A little survival guide to power dynamics, for autistics. 👇
Intended as a resource for confused #autistic people on social dynamics & power hierarchies!
Below are links to some threads & articles I've put together on the topic.
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#ActuallyAutistic #Neurodivergent #Autistic #Hierarchy #Society #Power #Capitalism #Education #Parenting #AuDHD #Exploitation
Are people naturally selfish and lazy?
Or are we built to be collaborative, and self-motivated?
A thread on human nature.
"Do you have to, or do you choose to?"
A thread on responsibility and empowerment.
Doghouse: the dynamics of blame.
An article.
https://www.neurofabulous.org.uk/dynamics-of-blame.html
#Heirarchy #Capitalism #Exploitation #Monopoly #Marginalized
22 fabulous and socially acceptable ways to shut people down.
An article.
https://www.neurofabulous.org.uk/article-tips-on-shutting-people-down.html
Why I don’t (usually) tell people when I’m not okay.
An article.
https://www.neurofabulous.org.uk/article-why-i-dont-say-when-not-okay.html
Ten ways in which rich, white, straight, educated males aren't lucky.
A thread.
What is bullying?
What is bullying? Bullying is defined as any action, words, behaviour (indeed , anything!) that's: 1. Repeated. 2. Done to harm someone. 3. Containing a power differential in the favour of the person doing it. A short thread 🧵 ⬇️ #ActuallyAutistic #Neurodivergent #Bullying #Education #Marginalized #PowerDifferentials #Heirarchy #School
@KatyElphinstone many years ago I saw an education department definition of bullying which was incredibly simple. It just said bullying has occurred when a person says they have been bullied.
It was a kind of recognition that the same type of comment on consecutive days depending on the tone of voice of the bully, the humour of the victim or the people around might have been received as bullying one day or might have been laughed off another day.
That's an oddly simplistic definition. I guess it must've developed since then into what it is now.
But whether it is bullying or not isn't, I feel, very connected with whether somebody laughs it off.
There is a lot of social pressure to laugh things off, especially for boys.
It's the element of somebody intending to harm you that's considered, and not your reaction. Which, I feel, is right & good. Focus should be on the perpetrator & not on the victim. (Although this often isn't the case).
@KatyElphinstone the laughing it off was my words not theirs. They merely said that the definition was that the bullying takes place when the person feels they have been bullied, and I like that.
if they think they were bullied, then they were.
I'm afraid I disagree... I've been thinking a lot about the phrase 'I don't mind' and why I hear it so much from the mouths of the powerless.
I do not think they have the luxury of minding.
I didn't, for many years.
It's better to think you don't mind if you have no choice about a thing. Point being, I think that even if the person appears fine, says they're fine, 'laughs it off', the thing that happened can still, absolutely, be bullying.
It's just occurred to me we may be talking at cross purposes about one element of all this.
Earlier, I perhaps made it sound as though I believe we shouldn't trust the recipient's judgement of the situation, nor their own experience of the event.
In which case, I didn't mean that in the way it came across.
I think we absolutely should trust their experience (while being aware that, due to societal conditioning & pressures, they may be unable to fully know and/or report on their real, deep, internal feelings).
And the other factors should be taken into account alongside that. Namely: if there was a power differential & in which direction, if the act was repeated, and it if was intended to harm.
And now, of course lol, I'm having the 'hmmm' moment of thinking...
Hey, what if the person being targeted by bullying genuinely doesn't give a crap and it doesn't affect them at all??
But... tbh... I think when there's a power differential... well, people with more power (by definition, really) have the traction - the resources - to in some way punish those with less.
Which makes genuinely not minding a kind of unlikely scenario.
Hmm.
Katy Elphinstone
Peter Brown