if you go to the circus for news
ball pit
nedjem
I literally say this to my beloved several times a week
most feminist line to ever not pass the bechdel test
stark
satan is not a fucking pogo stick/the orangutan
assigned cop at birth
kat goes to the 7/11
a smug, insufferable little clown baby
5p bags
gandalf big naturals
hands
short cows
cricket (too long to alt-text, enjoy here if you use a screenreader https://elodieunderglass.tumblr.com/post/178921341318/my-boyfriend-is-trying-to-explain-cricket-to-me)
ELODIEUNDERGLASS

if people haven’t been exposed to cricket before, here is the experience. The person who likes cricket turns on a radio with an air of happy expectation. “We’ll just catch up with the cricket,” they...

Tumblr
r2d2 sounds
class war
i am support
goddammit, mr noodle
twitter alternative
journal
real life creepypasta
this post has everything
times new bastard
making this screenshot mastodon-exclusive content because it sums up my experience of you lot so far
barbie really squirts
improving conservative memes
2007 wrapped
tell me why
to become god is the loneliest achievement of them all
green knight
post cancelled
elf pussy
tumblr user gandalfsbignaturals
straw man
mary magdalene
baba yaga
the matrix (1999)
furby island's ultimate survivor
a theological discussion
dost thou even hoist
behold a centaur
post punk
the laws of man may celebrate your deeds, but higher powers may say otherwise
sleepytime tea
prophecy
donkey from shrek
donald duck
scam caller
british lads
perverted deviance of modern society
buttbuttinations
people being mean to me
best sluntations
ok
what do your elf eyes see?
the delivery boys
ravioli approved
slutshaming alexander hamilton
@stavvers I still don't know who Alexander Hamilton is. Sounds like a guy who'd present Top Gear.
@stavvers As the owner-executor of several $10 bills, I’m going to allow the slutshaming to proceed.
@stavvers wasn’t Hercules Mulligan the super slutty one in the play, anyway?
@js_thrill to be fair, irl Hamilton was in love with Laurens and went so far as to invite him for a threesome with his wife, so he was a bit slutty
@stavvers The alttext is pretty bad, some I were transformed into |, “WTF is” became “Wifis”.

@stavvers ha yess this is ace

So gigantic magic eyes

@stavvers I’m afraid I thought the same when I read LOTR age 14.
Legolas must have enormous eyes or the wavelength of the light was different in the third age compared to now.
And Middle Earth was flat, not round.
@stavvers seeing people walking around with wide, dilated eyes and it's not drugs, they're elves seeing the Flat Earth.
@stavvers the last one fucks me up, can elves see their own back? By looking forward into a massive spyglass? How does the magic behave if they try to look into space? Does the sun never set for them?
@Mae look pal, you're gonna have to take this up with tolkien via a ouija board

@Mae @stavvers

I believe no on seeing themselves because the world doesn't loop for them (the edge connects to Valinor).

No matter how powerful the spyglass.

Obviously space is "flat" too.

The sun is obviously a super huge and intense spotlight.

@Mae @stavvers Maybe the earth is transparent for them and they can see through it!

@stavvers omg it got everything I love: physics, literature and a cute drawing of Legolas.

Made my day. 🥰

@stavvers my mother could make out the number of the bus coming around the curve of the hill a good four miles away. Had to hold her knitting out at arms length to count stitches, but she could make out the difference between the Edinburgh and Haddington buses on the road from Dunbar.
@stavvers I want all my elves to look like owls.
@stavvers i suppose they've zoom in eyes like the eagles.
@stavvers I am going to sign all my emails with best slutantions from now on

@stavvers

This is wrong. Venn diagrams use circles.

@stavvers this is depressingly accurate for me

@stavvers I just had a flashback to the old rec.games.frp.misc days, specifically the Inphobia debacle. Specifically, the Hey Net Punk post. Heady days.

https://groups.google.com/g/alt.games.whitewolf/c/ZLVNWrOIAOM

@stavvers
#TIL about whitewolf forums. Assamites only came out in the expansion though. But I was a #Brujah to the core!
Down with the #Ventrue
@stavvers these guys need to go to a FKK beach and chill.
There they can learn that nudity and eroticism are not the same.
Plus the majority of erotical pics is with (sometimes very tiny) clothes or other covering things.
@stavvers these guys will grow up to write “never happened” on posts where anything interesting happened.
@BethanyBlack honestly tempted to write "never happened" on Dean lying on the floor, bet that didn't happen, lads
@stavvers “you’re not drunk, you’re just sweeping”
@stavvers hashtag fucking nailed it
@stavvers Well he screwed a Dragon so that says something.
@stavvers very annoying to answer this as if it’s not just a funny shitpost, but I’m nd, and also a gardner w/ experience composting, and the real problem w/ those teabags is that celestial seasonings makes them with plastic so they don’t break down. you end up with little clods of plastic mesh all over your compost.
@stavvers
Union man, I bet. I'm canukian, I dunno if you have unions there...
@stavvers that image still exists? That was already around at Memebase 20 years ago. I wonder where the punk post person is now ...