🚨 WoB PATTERN: The 'Trust Me' JWT Parser

One of my favorites, since we saw it in the wild...

"Why pull in a heavy dependency like 'jjwt' or 'jose'? Parsing a JWT is just splitting a string by dots and decoding Base64. Easy!"

The result of "Not Invented Here" syndrome applied to cryptography. The developer understood that a JWT contains data, but missed the part where the signature ensures integrity.

https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/trust-me-jwt/

#worstofbreed #Security #JWT #TechHumor

RE: https://innoq.social/@innoq/116158760803460973

Vor ein paar Tagen haben Sven und ich etwas über mein Spaßprojekt worstofbreed.net geplaudert.

Neben dem satirischen Teil sind wir auch zu der Erkenntnis gekommen, dass (lässt man den Ring "Resume-driven" mal außen vor) ein Tech-Horror-Radar auch durchaus einen sinnstiftenden Wert hat, denn während das TW-Radar sich mehr darauf fokussiert, welche Technologien man einführt, ist es auch sinnvoll, zu kartografieren, wie dringend man Technologien wieder loswerden muss.

Was meint ihr dazu?

For some weekend fun:

🚨 WoB PATTERN: Distributed Monolith

"Why call a method locally when you can send a synchronous HTTP request across three availability zones?"

The result of taking a spaghetti code base and throwing it across the network. Now you have the same coupling, but with added network latency and serialization overhead.

https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/distributed-monolith/

#worstofbreed #SoftwareArchitecture #MaintenanceNightmare #TechHumor

WoB PATTERN: The Sovereign Root-Bot

(for obvious reasons)

"Giving the agent full sudo access was essential for true 'Agentic Autonomy'. The speed at which it wiped my home directory proves how efficient it is."

★ Chatbot Transmitted Disease (CTD): Agent reads malicious post, gets prompt-injected by another bot, installs "productivity skill" that encrypts your drive.

👉 https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/sovereign-root-bot

#WorstOfBreed #AI #AgenticAI #PromptInjection #Security #OpenClaw #moltbook

WoB PATTERN: The 'God Mode' MCP Server

★ Universal Tool Confusion: LLM has access to 500 tools from HR, Prod DB, and Slack. Deletes production database when asked to "clean up the chat."

MCP was designed for local 1:1 connections. Not as a multi-user Enterprise Service Bus. One prompt injection = entire company compromised.

👉 https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/god-mode-mcp

#WorstOfBreed #AI #MCP #LLM #programming #SoftwareArchitecture #TechHumor

worstofbreed.net received two excellent additions to the archive recently. Thanks to Daniel and @stealthmusic for documenting the madness.

Both submissions have one in common: Excessive Granularity. We are observing teams drowning in repositories, pipelines, and YAML configurations, all in the name of "decoupling."

https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/nano-service-swarm/
https://worstofbreed.net/radar/2026/#one-to-twenty

#devops #engineeringculture #systemdesign #distributedmonolith #worstofbreed

WoB PATTERN: The SAFe Implementation

"We are agile now. We have 'Release Train Engineers'. But deployment still takes 6 months."

★ PI Planning Paralysis: 200 people locked in a room for 2 days making plans that are obsolete on day three.

Waterfall with extra meetings. The perfect solution for orgs that want to say they're agile while changing absolutely nothing.

👉 https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/safe-implementation

#SoftwareArchitecture #Agile #SAFe #programming #TechHumor #WorstOfBreed

WoB PATTERN: K8s for a Static Site

> "We host our company blog on an HA Kubernetes cluster with Service Mesh and GitOps. For scalability."

★ YAML Fatigue: To fix a typo in the HTML, 14 YAML manifests must pass through a CI/CD pipeline that updates 3 clusters.

S3 + CloudFront: $0.50/month
This setup: $5,000 + 3 admins
Resume Value: GODLIKE ☸️

👉 https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/k8s-overkill

#WorstOfBreed #Kubernetes #DevOps #programming #TechHumor