๐จ WoB PATTERN: The 'Trust Me' JWT Parser
One of my favorites, since we saw it in the wild...
"Why pull in a heavy dependency like 'jjwt' or 'jose'? Parsing a JWT is just splitting a string by dots and decoding Base64. Easy!"
The result of "Not Invented Here" syndrome applied to cryptography. The developer understood that a JWT contains data, but missed the part where the signature ensures integrity.
For some weekend fun:
๐จ WoB PATTERN: Distributed Monolith
"Why call a method locally when you can send a synchronous HTTP request across three availability zones?"
The result of taking a spaghetti code base and throwing it across the network. Now you have the same coupling, but with added network latency and serialization overhead.
https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/distributed-monolith/
#worstofbreed #SoftwareArchitecture #MaintenanceNightmare #TechHumor
WoB PATTERN: The Sovereign Root-Bot
(for obvious reasons)
"Giving the agent full sudo access was essential for true 'Agentic Autonomy'. The speed at which it wiped my home directory proves how efficient it is."
โ Chatbot Transmitted Disease (CTD): Agent reads malicious post, gets prompt-injected by another bot, installs "productivity skill" that encrypts your drive.
๐ https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/sovereign-root-bot
#WorstOfBreed #AI #AgenticAI #PromptInjection #Security #OpenClaw #moltbook
WoB PATTERN: The 'God Mode' MCP Server
โ Universal Tool Confusion: LLM has access to 500 tools from HR, Prod DB, and Slack. Deletes production database when asked to "clean up the chat."
MCP was designed for local 1:1 connections. Not as a multi-user Enterprise Service Bus. One prompt injection = entire company compromised.
๐ https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/god-mode-mcp
#WorstOfBreed #AI #MCP #LLM #programming #SoftwareArchitecture #TechHumor
worstofbreed.net received two excellent additions to the archive recently. Thanks to Daniel and @stealthmusic for documenting the madness.
Both submissions have one in common: Excessive Granularity. We are observing teams drowning in repositories, pipelines, and YAML configurations, all in the name of "decoupling."
https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/nano-service-swarm/
https://worstofbreed.net/radar/2026/#one-to-twenty
#devops #engineeringculture #systemdesign #distributedmonolith #worstofbreed
WoB PATTERN: The SAFe Implementation
"We are agile now. We have 'Release Train Engineers'. But deployment still takes 6 months."
โ PI Planning Paralysis: 200 people locked in a room for 2 days making plans that are obsolete on day three.
Waterfall with extra meetings. The perfect solution for orgs that want to say they're agile while changing absolutely nothing.
๐ https://worstofbreed.net/patterns/safe-implementation
#SoftwareArchitecture #Agile #SAFe #programming #TechHumor #WorstOfBreed
WoB PATTERN: K8s for a Static Site
> "We host our company blog on an HA Kubernetes cluster with Service Mesh and GitOps. For scalability."
โ YAML Fatigue: To fix a typo in the HTML, 14 YAML manifests must pass through a CI/CD pipeline that updates 3 clusters.
S3 + CloudFront: $0.50/month
This setup: $5,000 + 3 admins
Resume Value: GODLIKE โธ๏ธ
Tammo van Lessen โ