Mastodawn

I seem to have identified a bug in my systems.
No matter how much time (in hours not minutes) I give myself to wrap my head around prepping & even starting to prep for eventually going to be at or if possible before midnight, I somehow still end up not getting to bed till 02:00 give or take half an hour.

I can feel completely zonked all day or all evening due to short nights of sleep if I have to get up early. It makes no sense. I think I need to start using a metaphorical hammer & somehow persuade myself that the world won't end if I do that thing tomorrow or those things the day after.

It does seem to be because there's that one thing, out of many that's been hanging over me for days, weeks, months or longer & today was going to be the day. So it may be late but this maybe the only time I have a set of spoons the right shape or strong enough to deal with this task. It's now or never.

It can be a small complex task, revamping bullet journal templates in my more app, sorting out all the stages for a future batch cook or a long laborious one involving things I'm not keen on like clearing up cobwebs & bugs 😱 or unidentified spills, dirt & giant dust bunnies 🤢.

I've tried reminders, alarms. I've planned days where everything has all the time I need & more but inevitably this either leads to stagnation because I'm so out of spoons not helped by the side effects of lack of sleep. Alternatively, the ADHD trait of getting sidetracked comes along & nixes my timings & tasks.
I've tried getting up earlier which, unless I have an early enough appointment or planned activity with or for other people generally fail to launch on time or if I survived the important thing in the early hours, I'm then a zombie & spend more time just sitting, gathering dice / spoons by not doing anything.

I keep telling myself I'll figure it out & find a way but I'm not sure I'm wired to ever find a fix for getting myself to bed before midnight.

#AuDHD #Autistic #ADHD #ActuallyADHD #ActuallyAutistic #TimeBlindness #ExecutiveDysfunction #LackOfFocus #SelfCare #Life #Sleep #SleepProblems

Verđandi K Soldusty Feb 5

@actuallyadhd @autistics

My getting up has slipped into the afternoons & I'm not happy about it.
Especially as in a few days I'll have to be up before 07:00 to be able to spend the day on an outing with friends. 🫣

Stricter morning routine?
- Alarm goes, switch on radio or preselected podcast instead of noticing the Mastodon notifications so I don't vanish down a 40+ notification hole?
🤔 … 🤔 In theory very easy to do, in practice very difficult to stick to, as my AuDHD screams for comfort from not being ready to face the day.

- Swap chores around with things I enjoy, want to get stuck into?
My big worry is that once I start the thing I want to do I will ignore all cues for stopping & doing the 'must do' tasks.

One possible fix for ignoring cues, is have lunch be the cut off point as I, like a lot of critters can be greatly motivated by food.
Current problem, lunch is around 18:00 give or take an hour & as I'm painfully aware of it being evening my brain & body default to evening mode, time to read or ideally, relax so those 'must do' tasks have pretty much a zero chance of happening.

I guess, I might be spending some time working this one out this afternoon / evening. I don't mind spending my evenings messing with dilemmas like this, as long as I can shove a movie I enjoy on whilst I'm doing it 🙂.
… That's if I remember 😅.

#AuDHD #Autistic #ADHD #ActuallyADHD #ActuallyAutistic
#Hyperfocus #TimeBlindness #ExecutiveDysfunction
#MindFog #Burnout #Spoons #NoSpoons #LackOfFocus #SelfCare

Verđandi K Soldusty Nov 17

@actuallyadhd @autistics

Really need to get to bed before midnight tonight, or I turn into a gremlin or something 🤷.

I need to start reclaiming my mornings as it would be nice to get to about lunch time & actually have accomplished some thing. Just simple things maybe but things like a bit of house cleaning, going for a walk, some reading & maybe a little bit of writing & drawing.

Maybe it could boost my confidence & make it possible to volunteer somewhere, even if the local volunteering options are only charity shop work.

#AuDHD #Autistic #ADHD #ActuallyADHD #ActuallyAutistic #MindFog #Burnout #Spoons #NoSpoons #LackOfFocus #SelfCare #Depression #Life #Sleep #SleepProblems