Anouk | The Anxious Cyclist

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359 Followers
258 Following
196 Posts

🏳️‍🌈 | Wife ❤️ | #Dutch person who loves #cats, #coffee and #cycling. I talk a lot about that. #Anxiety is my middle name, but I have made friends with it.

Oh, and I may have to mention that I have some #activism in me as well, especially regarding #climate and #animalwelfare.

Anouk | The Anxious CyclistJul 1, 2023

HAPPY TOUR DE FRANCE DAY Y'ALL!

Here's my almost successful attempt of making cartoon kids out of these titans.

#TDF2023 #drawingoftheday #pencilart #Velophants #Velophant #couchpeloton #BikeTooter #TourdeFrance

Show threadAnouk | The Anxious CyclistMay 29, 2023
@Grimulon I'll have to get more of these jackets 😂
Show threadAnouk | The Anxious CyclistMay 29, 2023
@Steveb I sure wish it was! No, it's actually a very retro looking bluetooth headphones, so connected to my phone. I know, way too modern aged. 😅
Anouk | The Anxious CyclistMay 28, 2023

I've surrendered myself to my obsession with everything #80s or #90s and I've been spending a lot of my time on Ebay. I found this gem of an oldschool bikers jacket the other day. Side AND back pockets. Man, it's so great. I received it yesterday and it's safe to say I fell head over heels in love with it. I need more of these. This thing is awesome 🤩

#vintage #cycling #BikeTooter #Velophants #Velophant #couchpeloton #bikersjacket #80svibes #90svibes #oldschool

Anouk | The Anxious CyclistMay 28, 2023
@hermannus dank je wel! Ik hoop het ook. Het lijkt momenteel best oké waar ik heen ga (grens met Zwitserland) dus ik heb goede moed! :)
Anouk | The Anxious CyclistMay 28, 2023

I've been quiet here for a bit. The Giro d’Italia has been a welcome distraction from all the previously shared misery.
Mentally I'm doing okay, physically I'm pretty tired after an intense week of courier shifts. Two more shifts to go this week and Friday I will hop on a train (two actually) to Italy for a recharge of the soul solo cycling trip. I desperately need it.

#cycling #cyclinglife #courierlife #bikecourier #fietskoerier #BikeTooter #Velophants #Velophant #couchpeloton

Show threadAnouk | The Anxious CyclistMay 9, 2023
@C_Miller thanks so much. I think so too. I'm handling it pretty well indeed. I'm absolutely devastated, but the way she did it was so next level mean, it does make it easier to accept. If this is who she is now, she's extremely toxic, especially to me. No way I can have that in my life and remain okay. Knowing that helps me now. That and cats. 😉
Show threadAnouk | The Anxious CyclistMay 9, 2023
@suicideprevention it does help, and it helps knowing here on Mas folks are reading it. I'm doing as good as I can considering the circumstances.
I have a few good people in my life as a safety net. It just breaks my heart that my sister turned out to not be one of them. 💔
Anouk | The Anxious CyclistMay 8, 2023

Well, I guess it's as intense as one would expect, having both my past and my present self's hearts broken in one go. I don't even know what to feel. I'm in this constant semi-dissociative state it feels like. It's why I write some of it down on here. It helps at least staying in touch with the ground instead of completely floating.
It's going to take quite some time to process this and find a place to put it away.
Mourning without death. So fricking complicated.

#CPTSD #MentalHealth

Show threadAnouk | The Anxious CyclistMay 8, 2023
@C_Miller thanks. It's good that the Giro has started and the women's Vuelta definitely helped yesterday. I do struggle, but it is what it is. It's like she's gone back to this persona of like 12 years ago. We were at a low point and she really hated me back then. I recognise so much of the pain. It's just like back then. I'll get through it, I have good people. Thank goodness..