HAPPY TOUR DE FRANCE DAY Y'ALL!
Here's my almost successful attempt of making cartoon kids out of these titans.
#TDF2023 #drawingoftheday #pencilart #Velophants #Velophant #couchpeloton #BikeTooter #TourdeFrance
I've surrendered myself to my obsession with everything #80s or #90s and I've been spending a lot of my time on Ebay. I found this gem of an oldschool bikers jacket the other day. Side AND back pockets. Man, it's so great. I received it yesterday and it's safe to say I fell head over heels in love with it. I need more of these. This thing is awesome 🤩
#vintage #cycling #BikeTooter #Velophants #Velophant #couchpeloton #bikersjacket #80svibes #90svibes #oldschool
I've been quiet here for a bit. The Giro d’Italia has been a welcome distraction from all the previously shared misery.
Mentally I'm doing okay, physically I'm pretty tired after an intense week of courier shifts. Two more shifts to go this week and Friday I will hop on a train (two actually) to Italy for a recharge of the soul solo cycling trip. I desperately need it.
#cycling #cyclinglife #courierlife #bikecourier #fietskoerier #BikeTooter #Velophants #Velophant #couchpeloton
Well, I guess it's as intense as one would expect, having both my past and my present self's hearts broken in one go. I don't even know what to feel. I'm in this constant semi-dissociative state it feels like. It's why I write some of it down on here. It helps at least staying in touch with the ground instead of completely floating.
It's going to take quite some time to process this and find a place to put it away.
Mourning without death. So fricking complicated.
I don't feel authentic in that regard. My sister knows that. I just don't understand why she would say that.
I'm struggling with not letting my mind go back to my old belief system of being bad to the core. I know she's not, but my mind still goes: "What if she is? She is. You're a narcissist."
Narcissistic families, the gift that keeps on giving.
#CPTSD #mentalhealthmatters #CPTSDAwareness #mentalhealth #anxiety #narcissisticfamilies #dysfunctionalfamilies
It feels so unfair. She threw some things in my face that make her feel unsafe around me, she says. In a text message over WhatsApp. No room what so ever to even talk about stuff. I was expecting that in this process. Difficult conversations. I didn't expect her to cut me out without even talking about it.
I think I might be too far along in my process and living too much in reality now. Maybe that's too confronting for her and she's lashing out. I don't know. It hurts.
And because this sister has always been special to me it hurts more. I instantly start questioning myself, which is horrible after everything I did to escape and become okay. Luckily I have good people around me, including my half-sister, her partner, my wife and my best friend, and all of them passionately keep telling me my sister is just projecting. I know that deep within, but man, I don't know how to deal with this.
#CPTSD #mentalhealthmatters #CPTSDAwareness #dysfunctionalfamilies
Good news! The vet was very happy with how the wound looked and how everything inside felt. Another week of rest and our little boy should be fine! 🙏🏻