One suggestion: If you want the fedi to be a welcoming place, don't jump in to someone's mentions to explain the fedi UNLESS explicitly asked to do so.
"But...."
But nothing. This place will survive a little technical misunderstanding or misstatement.
It will not survive newcomers being bombarded with endless fedisplaining.
Well actually...
@gmate8 someone has to, since you're clearly unable to figure out this very basic thing yourself.
and go easy on that homeowners ass behaviour.
@design_law ironically, @jeffjarvis literally just wrote a thread about content management systems in newsrooms, saying “computers surface territorial instincts”.
Indeed.
@paninid @design_law @jeffjarvis I think it would be interesting to advance the concept of "consensual advice*.
1. "Ask if the other person would like advice with a subject?"
2. "If the answer is NO, then don't give advice."
It is more considerate, but slows conversations...
Maybe a user profile could indicate preferences beforehand. Everybody is different. We could mark ourselves as "safe to BS with" or "okay with non-consensual advice". Maybe AI pre-screening of comments would work?
The platform could say "That looks like unsolicited advice and this person doesn't enjoy comments like that. Cover your post with a warning?"
@EarthlingNathan An interesting idea. I'm definitely never against confirming consent. And I don't think there's anything wrong with slowing conversations, tbh.
But I don't know that we always have to go that far, or bring AI into the mix. A little empathy goes a long way. If you're interacting with a stranger for the first time, just realize that any unsolicited advice will come across as hostile and critical (whether you, subjectively, intend that or not).
@design_law How will they "just realize that any unsolicited advice will come across as hostile and critical"? That is why I feel AI/tech training wheels could help.
Who teaches "consensual advice"? I only discovered it at 44 years old while putting serious thought into the question: "Why does normal conversation really tick some people off and get called mansplaining?"
The "just realize" is the hard part, I think. Plenty of folks "just" do and say what they are thinking without worrying about other parties becoming hostile. Plenty of them believe talking without reserve is helpful/safe/conversation starter.
Asking for communication consent requires time/work/effort/training. That extra work can be an unwelcome cost of communicating compared to environments where people are not "easily offended".
It is culture clash, depending on perspective, experience, and levels of understanding others.
@design_law @PeoriaBummer there is a saying, ironically from someone who the fedisplainers drove off of mastodon that I think applies to them:
“less self-awareness than a dog licking its own asshole in public.”
@design_law Funny how I never encounter these chuckleheads. Sure, I have fewer followers than you, but I manage a viral toot once in a while.
They seem to be really showing up for you though. Hmmm, I wonder what the difference is between you and me… 🤔
@design_law don't you know the correct answer is never lol 😉
(Yeah... this is not great)
@design_law This has been one of the biggest complaints I've heard from people. It's usually some combination of
- "it's overly complicated"
- "the people there seem like pretentious know-it-alls"
Which is an absolute shame.
To be honest, it's also annoying and boring to those of us who are not new.
@MerelyAHut
@design_law
It's not fedisplaining if someone answers a general and direct question. 🙂
One option: I know that some instances blocked journa.host last November, in part due to some folks' general suspicion of journalists and in part to protest particular journalists being allowed to join. I'd check with an admin of your instance to see if journa.host is blocked.
@MerelyAHut
@design_law
Well, I just checked the mstdn.party ABOUT page, and journa.host isn't listed as a moderated server. So it might not be that.
It could be the other way around (journa.host blocking mstdn.party), but journa doesn't publish its list of moderated servers, so not sure.
Hi @jonah
Can you help?
@MerelyAHut wants to, but can’t, see posts or replies from people on journa.host . I believe you’re an Admin for both MerelyAHut’s server and mine, and I successfully follow many people on journa.host
Wait... why? Do people do that? Why would people do that?
A social media is whatever people perceive it to be, non? Arguing the structure of the thing is like debating whether or not you should enjoy your night out with the friends depending on what fusing methodology the chairs use...
How did you determine "It will not survive newcomers being bombarded with endless fedisplaining." in what seems your 1 year since sign up?
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no more strolls for empresses
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