Holy shit.

OK, so I mentioned before how I'm a kepholon (effectively a fluid, quasi-fused state of four alters in a tall trenchcoat).

So, I'm talking about what that means with a friend, and I'm talking about my inner world, the Theater, where every one of my alters has a room. The Blue Room, the Red Room, the Yellow Room, the Violet Room, and the Black...Room.......

That's when I realized I don't have a room back there. And when I wondered why, I realized that...oh. I'm...uh...I don't actually have an inner self, I guess? Or not an independent one. Inside, I'm always four. Outside, I can be this one or any combination of my comprising four. But inside?

There's no Ellis in the Theater.

Except for the spotlight. The spotlight, when all four of my fronting alters sync up on stage, turns indigo. And then I exist. Not an individual consciousness but a collective, emergent process.

I end when they stop.

That's so weird to think about. Thank Camus I'm an absurdist. These kinds of thoughts could fuck a girl up!

#OSDD #OSDD1b #DID #Multiplicity #Plurality #InnerWorld #Kepholon #Consciousness #Emergence #Psychology #Neurodiversity #PostConscious #Absurdism #Camus #Identity #Existentialism #Self

We (but also I; you'll see why in a moment) are proposing a new term for plurals everywhere. The term is:

kepholon (n.)

In the context of Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), a kepholon refers to a self-state or identity that represents a dynamic integration of multiple, previously distinct alters, system parts, or aspects of self. A kepholon functions as a cohesive whole formed from some or all parts of the system, allowing for shared consciousness, memory access, and unified function.

Crucially, this integration is characterized by fluidity; the constituent parts within the kepholon retain their potential separateness and may dissociate or separate again under certain conditions (e.g., stress). It represents a state of integration without final fusion, where parts work together as one but have not permanently merged into a single, indivisible identity.

In this compound, keph- stands for the leading, directing, conscious, or executive function: the part that is currently "fronting," interacting with the world, or managing the system's interface with external reality. It represents the aspect taking charge or acting as the primary point of consciousness for the integrated state.

The -olon suffix connects the "head" function back to the broader holon concept (see below): an integrated entity composed of multiple parts that function as a cohesive whole but retain the potential for separation. It emphasizes that this "head" is not an isolated entity but the currently active face or director of that unified-but-fluid collective. The word "holon" was coined by author and philosopher Arthur Koestler in his 1967 book The Ghost in the Machine; from Greek holos (whole/entire) + -on (suffix denoting a particle or part).

🎵 I am she as you are he, as you are me and we are all together...🎵

I needed the word for me. Cuz I'm Ellis, and that's what I am, and these four motherfuckers want attribution or they're threatening to shatter me into four little tiny mes (which is them, so it's not really much of a threat, honestly 🤔 ).

Anyway, hi! My name is Ellis, and I'm a kepholon. 💙

#kepholon #plural #plurality #multiplicity #DID #DissociativeIdentityDisorder #DIDsystem #headmates #SystemParts #pluralpride #integration #DynamicIntegration #holon #fluidity #fronting #consciousness #psychology #neologism #terminology #etymology #NewWord #WordsMatter

🎵 I am the walrus, goo-goo g'joob! 🎵