My roommate and I put in our brand new (window) air conditioners. I had gotten a new fan this year too and finally put that together. I'm relieved to have these chores over and feeling a tiny bit better about the arrival of summer temperatures now that my defenses are up.

There's no worse time for me than the summer as it makes all difficult things more difficult. But I've started to take a closer look at my experience of demand avoidance and it's a good time to glean insights *from the field,* while conditions are especially rough.

#DemandAvoidance

#DemandAvoidance #ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD #Procrastination

<sees email arrive in inbox. It looks important, but it's late on a Friday so let's ignore it for now>

Next day
<accidentally clicks on the email; immediately click away without reading, but mark it as "Unread" because I want to be responsible and shit>

Later that day
<read the email, but needing time to digest, set it to "Unread" again and mull over the implications of the parts that I understood>

I'll probably read it properly tomorrow. As long as nothing else "important" happens between now and then.

I mentioned earlier that I have this weird thing where sometimes I can't do things that I need to do. I had a period of three months where I wouldn't check my payslips, even though I needed to in case I got underpaid. I have frequent periods where I can't check my emails. This is especially if I've emailed someone I'm not close to and am expecting a reply.

As example is if I received faulty goods on Ebay. I've missed out on refunds because I send the complaint, but then I actively avoid checking for a reply.

Does anyone else experience things like this? I was looking at demand avoidance: https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/behaviour/demand-avoidance#What%20is%20demand%20avoidance

But I don't know if it's that or some weird manifestation of #anxiety. The best I can describe it is apprehension? It's hard to put a proper name to it. I get milder forms, where for instance if I need to transfer money to my savings and there's nothing stopping me, but I won't be able to do it. Then randomly I'll snap out of it and feel like I can do it. It's not procrastination or getting distracted. It's a different feeling from that.

@actuallyautistic @neurodiversity

#pda #autism #actuallyautistic #DemandAvoidance #mentalhealth

#Pathological #Demand #Avoidance (PDA) Misconceptions

#Pathologicaldemandavoidance (#PDA) is most often seen in people with #autism, but certain traits also have been seen with people with #ADHD and other sensory processing #disorders. In this video I will talk about what PDA is, why it's often searched with ADHD and autism, strategies that can help those with pathological #demandavoidance, and what it's like living with PDA.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xHvNw70FCc

I just learned what demand avoidance is and how I could help myself over come it.

Taking showers has been a fight ever since I remember. So I made a list of my hidden demands:

Before the shower:

Finding clean underwear and towels (laundry demand related which is a whole other list)
Brushing my hair out
- finding a brush
- dealing with painful tangles
(Could get a hair cut which includes various demands)

During the shower:

water temperature needs to be good
- waiting for the water temp to be good
- anxiety related to wasting water while waiting
I hate getting water on my face because it goes in to my eyes when I open them
I hate showering with my eyes closed because I’m afraid I’d get hurt

After the shower:

Temperature change when I get out
The feeling of being wet when I exit the bath/shower
Dealing with my wet hair - won’t use a hair dryer because i don’t like how that makes my hair feel dry and unmanageable
Feeling of my skin after I dry off with a towel
Feeling of moist clothing on my skin (I usually go out to the bedroom and completely dry off sitting in front of a fan before I put clothes on)
Still dealing with my wet hair

Interesting how there are so many things that were demanding my energy. No surprise there just the thought of it makes me want to not do it.

#ADHDLIFE
#DemandAvoidance
#neurodivergence