“My god!” She exclaimed.

“What is it?” He asked.

“There’s no time to explain.”

She jumped up and from her desk in the operations room and ran to the metal locker in the corner.

She flung it open to reveal a full-bore shotgun, which she grabbed, along with as many shells as she could fit in her hands and jeans pockets.

“Veronica?! What are you doing!!” He screamed, now standing as well.

But it was too late. She had already charged through the door and had headed on to the datacenter floor.

He walked out onto the balcony to see what was going on. He was treated to only the briefest listen to the familiar white noise hum of the servers and equipment racks, before the tranquility was shattered by the unmistakable carnage of several shot gun shells being fired towards the hardware.

He ducked for cover. It must’ve only been a couple of seconds, but it felt like an eternity as she laid waste to the computers that until just a few minutes ago she had been peacefully monitoring.

The shooting subsided, he felt comfortable enough to stand up once again.

Dust, bits of servers, smoke and other debris filled the air.

She slowly walked back up the stairs, now covered in a dirty layer of the various materials, and holding a still smoking shotgun.

“What the hell was that about?!” He asked.

“The AI,” she said. “It started podcasting.”

#microfiction

@BurrLand01

First words of the AI podcast: "I am Mecha Hitler..."

@SecureOwl
"as many shells as she could fit in her hands and jeans pockets."
So she had 6 shells, because as we all know, you can't fit anything in women's jean pockets! LOL

#WomenDeserveRealPockets

@OohOkayKay Men's jeans aren't much better these days. That's why Cargo Pants became so popular @SecureOwl
@BackFromTheDud
We call them 'purse pants' LOL
BTW. I loved the story!
@OohOkayKay @BackFromTheDud reminds me of the fact that #EngelbertStrauss seems to be the only company that makes #SkirtsWithPockets!

@kkarhan
It's getting better. I bought a dress this spring and it has pockets in it. They're not the greatest but at least it's a step forward.

@BackFromTheDud
I apologize in advance for hijacking your wonderful story with pocket complaints. Sorry.

@OohOkayKay @kkarhan @BackFromTheDud
Patch pockets on skirts and dresses. Side pockets bulge funny. But, any pockets are a step forward. Women's utility kilts would work.

@Puck @kkarhan @BackFromTheDud
No.
How about the manufacturers just put decent pocket in women's clothing, period. And not charge us extra!
They do it for men ... why not for women?

#WomenDeserveRealPockets

@OohOkayKay @Puck @BackFromTheDud OFC they deserve decent pockets.

- It's just that only by buying products that have pockets [and refusing tovbuy those that don't] will clothing companies see this as a "make or break" feature and correct their designs accordingly.

Remember: Under #capitalism, your reciept is your vote - every single time!

And yes, I am mad at the enshittification of things too…

@kkarhan @Puck @BackFromTheDud
And buy what instead?
When the market doesn't give you alternatives (that you can afford), what then?

The other thing is ... They used to put the same pockets in women's jeans back in the 70-80's, then they stopped giving us full pockets and replaced them with shallow useless excuses that we could only fit a tube of lipstick in. 🙄

@OohOkayKay @Puck @BackFromTheDud buy men's jeans or DIY?

IDK, but that's the only options I can see…

@OohOkayKay I didn't write the story. 😉
@SecureOwl "do not connect this machine to a Microsoft account, no matter how nice it asks!"
@SecureOwl
The horror... The horror...
@SecureOwl why I laugh and feel this could be good dark horror comedy pitch?
@SecureOwl having the shotgun so close to the server room was good planning.

I would've gone for wire cutters instead. Or an emergency power off switch.

@atomicbird @SecureOwl

@wonka @atomicbird @SecureOwl I knew a person that had a service axe.

Not as good as wire cutters for network cables inside a rack.

@ahltorp @atomicbird @SecureOwl

@SecureOwl
The faster action would be to just unplug the routers.
A couple of 800G optical links is all the isolation really needed...
@StompyRobot i should explain: this story takes place in the United States, so I wanted to capture the culture, traditions and customs when it comes to the preferred way of dealing with any sort of situation.

@SecureOwl @StompyRobot

"I got the last of the regular sausage at the store, but only 12 and we need 16, so I got these plant-based ones as a backup."

<sound of a shotgun being racked>

"Not on MY watch."

@tezoatlipoca @SecureOwl @StompyRobot

As a good Texan, I feel like that's not an overreaction.

@SecureOwl And here I was thinking that the MFP would be the recipient of 00 buckshot.

@poindexter @SecureOwl Not sure I'd use buck shot on a rack mounted PC. They're usually made of some pretty tough metal. Even 00 might not penetrate.

Think I'd go for slugs. The slime alone should do ruin the electronics.

@SecureOwl - understandable response
@SecureOwl Great story! Very well written
@SecureOwl True art, write some more and don't ever change.
@SecureOwl I was sure it was going to be the printer.
@SecureOwl To maintain the suspension of disbelief, this story should be set in the US or Russia because of the shotgun. An AI starting podcasting ... yeah, that sounds plausible.
Mike Sheward (@[email protected])

@[email protected] i should explain: this story takes place in the United States, so I wanted to capture the culture, traditions and customs when it comes to the preferred way of dealing with any sort of situation.

Infosec Exchange

@SecureOwl
Put a woman in charge. :)

I really need to swap my 12 gauge for a 16 gauge. With this shoulder I could only fire it once and I'll never use that shoulder again.

AI WWE Channel has a stroke THREE TIMES ON THE SAME VIDEO! (WORLD RECORD!)

YouTube
@SecureOwl
I, for one, give propz to this woman for her proportionate response.
@SecureOwl I know it’s fiction, but if it had been real, I would imagine the risk of ricochets had been quite high.

@ahltorp thats why you use lead instead of steel shot

steel shot damn near always bounces

also, safety glasses.. you only get hit by a shot coming back once before you decide that maybe they are a good idea 😅 proper PPE is important in the work environment

@SecureOwl

@bweller Our sergeants and lieutenants would not have passed me if I had trusted in ricochets not coming back, or even more importantly, risked hurting civilians. We didn’t use shots, though, we used 7.62 NATO.
@SecureOwl
Always know where the master power switch / breaker is!
@SecureOwl This story *is* glorious… and if anyone wants more glory on LLM-generated podcasts, this post is amazing: https://katedaviesdesigns.com/2026/04/29/knitting-bullshit/
Unraveling AI's 'Knitting Bullshit'

'Unraveling AI's 'Knitting Bullshit'

Kate Davies
@SecureOwl 000 buck. It’s the only way to be sure.
@SecureOwl I don't know how to clap my hands here. But yay, I want more please.
@SecureOwl
AI podcasts feels like they're probably already a thing?
AI/finance/bro podcasting could be rife with at least attempts to get traction for such?
@Gurre @SecureOwl I've had to endure excruciating AI-written and voiced "podcasts" creeping into corporate training material over the last couple of years. I can't stand them - they are dire and make my brain hurt.
@SecureOwl As a podcaster, I like that story! 😁
@SecureOwl sci-fi reality award-winner right here
@SecureOwl I feel sorry for those computers. If maybe she could do whatever she was doing to the people responsible for putting those computers there, it’d probably solve a lot of our problems.