Fesshole 🧻I told my partner I was fluent in French on our first date. Five years later, we're moving to Lyon for his job. I've spent £2,000 on intensive tutoring in the last three weeks. I'm currently at 'The cat is under the table' level. I am terrified.
Lulu Helle 
@fesshole bon chance!
Geoff
Dror Bedrack@fesshole on the bright , he probably never listened to you anyway
Inc Hulk 🧪@fesshole Needs immersion for rapid learning. You can get radio & TV in French, so have it on all the time that you can. Listening to the news is good because you know what subjects are in the world news currently (right now, that is dead easy). Lyon is a fantastic place!
Simon EI3JDB
Daburu Dar
RigsbySiv
KeithWM
Third spruce tree on the left
Tattie
Tired Sponge@fesshole Mon Dieu!
Don Magnétophone@fesshole You will be okay. French language is a scam and french people are not even fluent in their own language 👍
Peperlito
Nathan A. Stine@fesshole quelle dommage!
MFennVT has moved@fesshole Oopsie!
Alan Bellingham@fesshole "No dear, I'm pretty sure I said I wish I was fluent in French"
Rob Vincent 🎙️@fesshole J’peux bouffer du verre ça m’fait pas mal.
sonja dolinsek@fesshole having learned many languages: Watch videos with subtitles. Anything that gets you used to the sound. Enjoy Lyon
Sin Vega@fesshole I could have told him for you for £1,200 and taught you more than that myself. And I only did french for two weeks in school by accident
Telling someone I was fluent in #french taught me never to #lie on your #resume.
I worked at an indie record store in the early 90s. We were that cool indie store like in #highfidelity (complete with music snobbery and attitude). And like most indies we sold "smoking accessories".
1/
On Saturday nights, the #haitian field workers would be bussed into town to buy stuff and blow off some steam. A bunch of them came into the shop. My boss turns to me and says "ask Tree, he knows French."
Like every #ontario high school student, I had to take french up to grade 10. Unlike every #ontario high school student, I thought that practically made me fluently bilingual. So I said as much on my resume and then promptly forgot all about it.
2/
So flash forward. These dudes know ZERO anglais. But the word "fumer" isn't hard to sus, neither was one of them flicking a zippo lighter and pointing at it, turning it upside down like it was empty. "Oh, you need lighter fluid. yea we got that." We figured it out (I even counted their change out in french), but it was _painfully_ obvious that I was nowhere close to fluent.
3/
@tezoatlipoca @sinvega @fesshole In fairness, even if you had been fluent in French you might have struggled with the accent not being familiar.
n1k0@fesshole good news is, you only need one word https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GSeaDQ6sPs0&feature=youtu.be
Learn French in One Word
K4mpfie
felix
FiXato
Pseudonymous 
La langue française est une forme obsolète d'impérialisme culturel. Oubliez leur discours désastreux. 
Negative12DollarBill@fesshole Try to arrange lots of situations involving cats and tables. You're welcome.
Mans R
GJ Groothedde 🇪🇺@fesshole Cela t'apprendra à raconter des carabistouilles. Deux mille balles ! S'il découvre, ce ne sera pas ta fête, je me dis.
Von Xylofon@fesshole I am afraid there are no monkeys in the forests around Lyon either.
staringatclouds@fesshole Je ne parl pas français, trés desolé
Kids in the Hall - Directions (I speak no English)
Paul Edwin@fesshole Ah, c'est la vie !
C++ Wage SlaveI had the opposite experience. I knew my boss socially, and he knew I could speak passable French, so he called me into a meeting, without notice, as an interpreter in a highly technical discussion for which I knew none of the specialist vocabulary. Fortunately, in computing, as I rapidly discovered, French mostly uses mildly Frenchified versions of English terms, so a Raid controller is "un controller Raid", where "Raid" is pronounced like the French word "raide". Somehow, I muddled through and we had a productive discussion. It was hard work, though!
@fesshole when learning a language:
There is no such thing as one sentence. All conversion is made up of multiple interconnected sentences. You get to choose the sentences you want to use because you own your half of the conversation. The more you talk using more sentences the more grammar and vocabulary you use. It does not matter how bad your grammar and vocabulary is, what matters is how much you show you want to speak with other people.
Matthew Wilson@fesshole read Houellebecq.