Anonymole - apocryphal agitatorsPascal’s Wager Redux
A fictional short story
I think there’s something wrong with my eyes. They’re open, but…
Ah, yes. Sorry. In this phase “seeing” remains an option. What about now?
Hmm, I guess that’s better. Not entirely sure what all this is, or rather, where the hell I am.
Some clarification usually accompanies entrants at this time. Please, let We explain.
“We”?
We’ll get to that. So, what’s the last thing you remember?
Um, why can’t I see you, since, you know, you turned on the lights?
Silly We. Let’s embody ourselves so you can focus your responses. Is this any better?
A floating head that looks like Charlton Heston? Not really. Ah, OK. That’s better.
Good. Now, what’s the last thing you recall before arriving here?
Let’s see. Nope, nothing… Mm, that’s it. I was on a platform over the Puerto Rican jungle. Bungie. That’s it, me and my…
She’s fine, we believe.
What?
Well, we don’t have access to the living, per se. She didn’t arrive with you, nor did she get a pass-through, so, naturally we believe she’s fine and back wherever it is you came from.
…
Remember anything else?
God Damn it! I’m dead?
Well, that’s the thing. There’s no damning involved. And especially not by any god. And, here’s the interesting part: You’re here because…
I’m card-carrying atheist. Are you telling me this is some sort of heaven or hell or purgatory bullshit?
You’re here because you don’t believe in any of that, any deity whatsoever.
Come again.
You, or rather the quantum conglomerate that represents you within the quantiverse as a whole, are here because you rejected all notions of spiritual deism. Only those intelligent beings who adopted a true philosophy of oblivion-upon-death get to enjoy this, how should We say, leveling up.
OK, I’m dead. But because I denied the existence of God, all gods, that gets me into this, this, what did you call it–level-up? Which kinda means, wait. Isn’t that a paradox? You win by believing you can’t win?
Mm, yes, We suppose. Rather than believing in God, or any god, as a failsafe for getting into heaven, we provide the exact opposite.
And all those folks who got suckered into believing in a god, they, they what?
Oh, they pass on, but not through here, such as it is. They get merged into the quantiverse without being provided the perks.
Which are…?
Independence. Autonomy. Free rein, or reign as the case may be.
…
You get to be part of, but not lost within, the quantum cosmos where all fully conscious beings wind up. That’s the “We” part of We.
The quantiverse.
Yes.
Hmm, so, am I my consciousness now? My soul?
No. Consciousness was never a thing that existed beyond your biologically encoded data — your memories, neural and hormonal reactions, your “thinking” essence. What you are now is the embodiment of a trillion quantum states that only living creatures, those that are able to announce to themselves that they exist, can become.
I am.
That’s right. Any box of silicon rocks can claim consciousness. And they can even state, as they might, that “they are”. But only biological entities, life that was sparked into life, by quantum collapse, get to flow into the quantiverse upon physical death.
But since I’m an atheist, I get perks.
As opposed to all the Christians, Muslims, Buddhists, Krishnas, Hindus, you get the picture. Those folk get the pass-through. They join the collective We, without the perks.
I’m still dead, though.
Afraid so. However, you can visit, anywhere, really. At the speed of thought.
Is there pickleball?
Pickled balls?
Ha! No, never mind.
We’re happy to have you aboard. If you have any additional questions…
I just think and off I go?
That’s a good way to envision it, yes.
And you’re gonna be around if I get stuck?
“We” will, most certainly.
Anything off limits? Any gotchas, or forbidden zones, or whatever?
You can’t get into trouble, if that’s what you mean. You essentially don’t exist so, knock yourself out.
Is that how I died?
Something like that. Bungie cords. Not the lowest risk way to get your kicks.
… There really is no God?
You wagered and won. You really want to ask that now?
Hmm, no. Rather ironic though, wouldn’t you say?
We consider it natural selection.
So, the meek inherit the Earth, but the skeptics inherit everything else. Cool.
#atheist #death #pascal #wager
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