One half of the nation’s favourite Duopoly have today moved to calm down this whole ‘price gouging’ PR crisis.
With the Australian Competition And Consumer Commission threatening legal action against Woolworths and Coles for being price-gouging dogs, the Green Team have decided to make the ACCC an offer the can’t refuse.
A rare vintage Blue SPIRIT Mufasa Ooshie.
That’s right, literally one of the hardest Ooshie’s to get your hands on!
An Ooshie that could cause two suburban mum’s to throw hands at the counter over its possession.
The incredibly generous offer comes after months of negative headlines about the supermarkets behaviour in the middle of a cost of living crisis.
Both Coles and Woolworths have posted consecutive years of billion dollar profits, despite apparently being forced to up their prices to combat ‘logistical and supply costs.’
The ACCC also found the companies did things like sharply raise the prices of products for a short period of time before ‘price dropping them’ to way more than the original price.
That has lead to the ACCC launching legal action and threatening ‘heavy penalties’ – in seperate cases against the companies.
However, it’s believed Woolworths is now hoping to have the action dropped, with a very juicy special offer for the ACCC.
“You’d be mad not to take it,” said a spokesperson for Woolworths.
“We are operating exactly like a profit-driven company in a capitalist society should operate.”
“Everyone pretending like we need to have some moral and social compass should get their heads read.”
“The ACCC should accept our Ooshie offer and get back to chasing dodgy solar panel installers.”
The ACCC is yet to comment on the offer.
More to come.
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#satire #AusPol #gouging #duopoly #ShitParty #ShitLiteParty #FsckOffDutton #WhyIsLabor #groceries
Droppie [loma] 🐨♀🌈🐧🦘
