https://www.engadget.com/social-media/twitter-turned-20-and-i-feel-nothing-140000602.html?src=rss // we were supposed to open a time capsule on March 21, 2026 that we sealed at the Folsom Street office before moving HQ to Market Street.

Happy Vernal Equinox for people in the northern hemisphere!
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¡ǝɹǝɥdsᴉɯǝɥ uɹǝɥʇnos ǝɥʇ uᴉ ǝʅdoǝd ɹoɟ xouᴉnbƎ ʅɐuɯnʇnⱯ ʎddɐH

Pleroma is not for everyone. Minor side effects include weight gain, weight loss, abrupt loss of body hair, blood loss, clogged arteries, appetite suppression, appetite aggression, sudden and explosive bowel movements, irrational fear of loved ones, bleeding gums, severe vomiting, rectal chafing, sensitive nipples, and dizziness. In some cases, lab animals exposed to Pleroma have developed a second spine. More serious side effects include rapid bodily discharge from the nose, ears, mouth and eyes. Pleroma is known to cause spectacular and enduring yeast infections in both men and women. Pleroma will not respect you in the morning. Total tongue dysfunction is possible along with the spontaneous growth of a non-functioning nipple on your upper arm. Cultural side-effects include the affection of a Southern drawl. Chemical dependency on Pleroma is not only possible, but is classified by the government as "likely" or "very likely". Pleroma is not legal in all states. Prolonged use of Pleroma may result in bouts of blindness, hallucination, and allergic reactions to your own saliva. Pleroma may cause you to commit crimes against God or nature. Rashes caused by Pleroma are nothing compared to other side effects including evolutionary reversal in children and an uncontrollable thirst for blood controlled by the lunar cycle. Taking Pleroma may result in impaired function of your motor skills and in some rare cases, illiteracy. Pleroma may become angry at you and seek revenge. Often, men who take Pleroma have reported developing female reproductive organs. Pleroma will not be held responsible should it demand you offer it your eldest son in sacrifice. Should an overdose of Pleroma be accidentally taken, God help you. Some people who take Pleroma have reported itching eye sockets that drove them insane. Do not drive, operate heavy machinery, or run within five weeks after taking Pleroma. People over forty who take Pleroma have reported that their gums have taken on the color, texture, and taste of chocolate pudding. Taking Pleroma when the temperature is over seventy degrees may result in the melting of your brain, scorched liver, and internal bleeding. Three out of five people who took Pleroma reported that their spouses and children left them. Some doctors will lie about Pleroma, because we pay them to. For additional warning, please see the side of the package. Thank you for choosing Pleroma.