@ralfmaximus Your love language should be tailored to the person you love's needs. "How can I support you?" is something you should be familiar with saying to someone you love, because it puts them first. They may very well say "help me research this thing" or "do you have advice?", but if someone is venting, and they haven't asked for a solution, you should always ask first, because it can seem dismissive or fall into something like mansplaining because it makes the assumption that this person has not done the research for their own problems in the first place.

I agree, it's easy to fall into wanting to fix people's problems when you just want to help your loved ones, but you can be nuerodivergent and considerate to another neurodivergent person's needs at a given time.