For a while now I've been trying to come up with some truly bad programming language ideas (basically combining features from languages I don't like into a behemoth that should never have been born) and here are some of the most horrifying ones I could think of:

  • Perl 5 combined with Objective-C
  • A Brainfuck dialect that includes the weird reflective and meta properties of Lisp
  • Java but with the stability of Node.js
  • C# but also it's been turned into an Objective-C like
  • COBOL but with the structure of Pascal
  • A purely object-oriented Itanium assembly language (the worst form of assembly I can think of with the added hell of Smalltalk).
  • More suggestions welcome.


    #Programminghumor #programming-languages #psychic-damage?

    "If you have used OCaml 5 this will feel familiar, except OCaml keeps its effects out of the types, so you find out about an unhandled one at runtime, in production, on a Friday."

    "If you have used Haskell this will also feel familiar, except in Haskell you would be assembling a monad transformer stack, lifting each operation through every layer by hand, and explaining to a junior colleague that a monad is just a monoid in the category of endofunctors, what's the problem."

    https://www.stephendiehl.com/posts/prism/

    #ocaml #functionalprogramming #haskell #programminglanguages

    Crypto in 2026: Oh, This is the Bad Place - Stephen Diehl

    Personal blog of Stephen Diehl - Software engineer writing about technology, programming, and the future

    Stephen Diehl
    Crypto in 2026: Oh, This is the Bad Place - Stephen Diehl

    Personal blog of Stephen Diehl - Software engineer writing about technology, programming, and the future

    Stephen Diehl

    @ekuber I fully agree, but as you know #Rust wasn't designed to prevent as many bugs and vulnerabilities as possible, only some of them, mostly memory safety issues.

    That's why I've been trying to make a comprehensive list of problems and how they might be solved or mitigated by a next-generation programming language: https://github.com/gato-lang/gato/blob/main/design/bug-types.md

    #ProgrammingLanguages

    gato/design/bug-types.md at main · gato-lang/gato

    The Gato programming language. Contribute to gato-lang/gato development by creating an account on GitHub.

    GitHub
    🚀 Ah, the intellectual elite has spoken: Lisp in Rust's type system! Because why not complicate your life with a cocktail of languages that no one asked for? 🎩🤔 Clearly, the world was just waiting for another #GitHub labyrinth to navigate while pretending to be productive. 🔄💻
    https://github.com/playX18/lisp-in-types/ #LispInRust #TypeSystem #ProgrammingLanguages #Complexity #DeveloperHumor #HackerNews #ngated
    GitHub - playX18/lisp-in-types: Lisp implemented inside Rust trait system

    Lisp implemented inside Rust trait system. Contribute to playX18/lisp-in-types development by creating an account on GitHub.

    GitHub

    #ProgrammingLanguages, targets, and platforms

    I started as a #Java developer, but for some time now, I have broadened my horizons. Recently, I thought about how early languages were dedicated to a single target and platform, and now they are broadening their focus. In this post, I want to write down my thoughts in the hope that it may be useful to others, probably to my future self.

    https://blog.frankel.ch/programming-languages-targets-platforms/

    Programming languages, targets, and platforms

    I started as a Java developer, but for some time now, I have broadened my horizons. Recently, I thought about how early languages were dedicated to a single target and platform, and now they are broadening their focus. In this post, I want to write down my thoughts in the hope that it may be useful to others, probably to my future self. Definitions You may have been wondering about the title terms.

    A Java geek

    I wonder if anyone has ever invented a programming language where their primary goal was to make it easy to debug?
    What features would it need to have, in that case?

    #Programming #ProgrammingLanguages

    If you had to choose - just based on the enjoyment of writing the code - what programming language would you choose?

    Looking for some inspiration. I’ve heard good things about the Odin programming language.

    #programming #programminglanguages #coding

    PLDI keynote: we don’t need LLVM IR; we need LLM IR 🤦‍♀️

    #programminglanguages

    Nanowar Of Steel - Kotlin (Official Power Point Video)

    YouTube