Sometimes y’all, there is the perfect meme.

#witchy #infosec #darkarts #updates #funny

My two eldest were talking yesterday about social anxiety and how it can be debilitating, suggesting perhaps I didn't understand this. I explained that I get enormous social anxiety but have just learned - maybe not necessarily to deal with it - but to compartmentalise. I know the payoff will be worthwhile.

I had to attend a party last week I reeeally didn't want to go to, but I knew I owed it to the person who's party it was who I love very much, and that there would be people there I love very much and don't see that often, and crucially, the last big party like that I went to for them was 20 years ago, so I'd check a big one off the list I won't have to do again for absolutely ages. Turns out I also had a great time, which was unexpected (of course I always do and it is always unexpected).

But I told them instead about my trip to the spa the other day. I'm in the pool and there's a group of maybe 20 young men all approximately the same age, all very very tall and very very thin and athletic. All I'm saying is that I've never seen so many abs in one place since the 5ive-themed fancy dress party. Outside is 30° sunshine, jacuzzis and sun-loungers. I want to be outside but it is *busy*. Lots of young people in various states of undress - some quite bold. I keep looking out there to see if I can scurry my way to a location where I can set up basecamp. I then worry I look like I'm checking people out like some horrendous pervert-ogre. But I realise I might be overthinking things and resolve to try and put this silliness to one side and just go out there, soaking wet in nothing but essentially some large pants in front of all of these beautiful confident young people and I won't look like a freakish aged mutant intent on ruining their day - I am just a man, a normal man, I am not a weird hideous monster I am just a normal person who wants to sit in the sun. OK I'm definitely overthinking this. So I go outside. Oh no. It is *really* busy and the space is much smaller than I thought. There is one sunlounger left. It's in extremely close proximity to two young ladies. I'm going for it...... E-excuse me, b-b-but is someone sitting there?... Looks. From everywhere. It's fine Ben, just breathe, you haven't done or said anything weird, you're overthinking this. One replies; 'dunno mate - if there's no towel on it I reckon you're fine'. A normal response. I passed the test. I thank them and go to lie on a bed right next to them like it's totally normal. Just like I'm breaking into their home and getting into bed with them. Totally normal. Normal people stuff. You're overthinking this, Ben. Oh no. What if I sit on the end and it flips up and everyone laughs? How am I supposed to get on it? Do I straddle it then ease myself down? I think...... No. I will slide my way up from the bottom. So I sort of straddle then ease down onto it, for some reason expecting my shorts to just fly off, so am terrified, then lay down and sort of slither up. What do I do with my arms? The arm bits are too high up. This can't be right. So I put them inside the arm rests squashed down by my side. It's very uncomfortable. Then I realise. The lounger is sort of a relaxed L shape, but my head is at the hinge area. I've made a mistake. I'm squished into the lower part straight out like a snake and my legs are totally off the end.

I. Must. Look. Insane.

So I then have to get up and sit on it like a normal human being and then I realise there's someones shoes next to it and that I've stolen someone's seat but that's another story and that is one small tale of an experience that lasted less than a minute that I had to navigate, which was essentially working out how to sit down.

I don't know about social anxiety? Honey I *am* social anxiety.

Just sharing this reminder of a really glorious day in the #mountains .
I spent quite a bit of time to find exactly THIS spot so that fore and midground blended so well together.

And currently I'm having this as a background image in teams. Sometimes I wonder if this might look unprofessional - and then I think "maybe I don't care".

#photography #hiking #landscape #bavaria #alps #outdoors