Mastodawn

Mark Holtom (aka Kingbeard)

"Back to work today, forgot my pass so locked bike outside Cannon Street station. Left work at 6pm to find just the cut lock and no bike, resigned to never seeing my trusty stead again asked the station if they have cameras. A guy appeared waving at me, asked me to put the code into my cut lock. He replied ‘I have your bike’ with a smile I will never forget!! His name is Abdul Muneeb and he works for South Eastern Railways, he was on a break and saw a guy bolt cut the lock and challenged him to give it back, he then took it inside and waited 4 hours after his shift finished to personally make sure I got my bike back. The world needs more Abdul’s, he is a legend of a man and a credit to his employer."
Story Credit: Steve Farmer

Kerplunk Sep 26, 2025

Ouch, Mark you were very lucky.

But please buy a real lock, intelligent thieves crack the code, dumbasses cut the cable.

And I appreciate all locks are breakable but some are much harder that others and take longer meaning more time for attentive persons to catch shitbag bike thieves.

FreediverX Sep 26, 2025

@Kerplunk @MarkHoltom
Any lock can be picked and any cable or chain can be cut. These are only theft deterrents, and any bike left unattended long enough will be stolen.

Clinton Anderson SwordForHire Sep 26, 2025

@freediverx @Kerplunk @MarkHoltom

Lots of locks take longer to cut than a cable lock.

Lots of locks take longer to "pick" than a cable lock with a tumbler.

Of course it's a deterrent.... What else would you expect a lock to be?

I'm not trying to make my bike unstealable. I'm making sure your bike is way easier to steal than mine.

And yes, there needs to be waaaaaay better End Of Ride facilities all over.

Mark Burton Sep 26, 2025

@MarkHoltom
Thanks for sharing. A lovely anecdote.

myrmepropagandist Sep 26, 2025

I'm glad you got your bike back. But also if it's not a U lock it's not doing anything for a bike.

I used two U locks and my bike is old and frankly worth less than the locks.

MJ Ray Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @MarkHoltom is that victim-blaming?

myrmepropagandist Sep 26, 2025

@mjr @MarkHoltom

Yes.

I've thought about doing a youTube channel where I'd walk around and make videos about how badly locked up some bikes are. "Rate My Lock Job"

Mark really lucked out to have Mr.Muneeb looking out for him.

MJ Ray Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @MarkHoltom there's enough such vids and I suspect it inspires more thieves to go look than lockers to upgrade. Most locks are either casual deterrents or the minimum for insurance. On one level, I know what you mean because I don't lock in town with only a cable, but you ought to be and it seems like police are AWOL on this.

myrmepropagandist Sep 26, 2025

@mjr @MarkHoltom

NYPD laughs in the face of people who have their bike stolen. I've always said if they wanted to be better liked all they'd need to do is a few stings every year to catch prolific bike thieves but they can't be bothered and so those of us who bike live in the wild wild west.

Phosphenes Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom

Yeah and if you catch 1 thief you've probably solved and prevented 100 other thefts. Only a few people steal stuff and we are all creatures of habit.

The police in our area showed a similar lack of concern when our car was stolen. Why investigate one car? Because the people who took it probably stole dozens of other cars. Arresting one can end a crime wave.

Michael Reese Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom while it's not surprising, I'm still a wee surprised the NYC cops don't prioritize it at all. My understanding is that bike theft often helps fund a lot of other (much more headline grabbing) criminal activity. I can't find any of the articles that I recall having read on it, but I know in the Bay Area that's the case, and that there are major police ops on stolen bikes.

myrmepropagandist Sep 26, 2025

@notoriousiptg @mjr @MarkHoltom

This might sound absurdly petty, but for a variety of reasons NYPD dislikes people who ride bikes. They constantly have these absurd little traffic stops for bikes near the bridges that come in to Manhattan from the Bronx and Brooklyn and hold up everyone exiting the bridge looking for someone who ran a red light. Or they give everyone tickets even if you didn’t run a red light.

myrmepropagandist Sep 26, 2025

@notoriousiptg @mjr @MarkHoltom

If you simply contest it and show up it will be dropped since the won’t pull the camera footage or (as it was in my case) even if they did it wouldn’t show me running the light. But I’ve had two Saturdays wasted over bogus tickets.

I think they just assume everyone on a bike is a “terrorist”

Michael Reese Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom 🤷‍♀️ many policy decisions I just don't get. That def sounds frustrating

@futurebird @notoriousiptg @mjr @MarkHoltom

More likely they're mad because bike activist rightly raise a stink when cops park in the bike lanes

K M Lawrence Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @notoriousiptg @mjr @MarkHoltom here's how the metropolitan police treated London cyclists in 2012:

https://www.counterfire.org/article/london-2012-police-attack-critical-mass-cyclists/

(Important to note that critical mass rides are broadly legal, or at least were at the time)

London 2012: police attack Critical Mass cyclists

Hundreds of cyclists taking part in the monthly Critical Mass bike ride were detained and kettled by the police on Friday evening, while the Olympic opening ceremony was in full swing The cycle ride was in defiance of anticipated 'resistance' by the Metropolitan police.

Counterfire

otto Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @notoriousiptg @mjr @MarkHoltom That seems a bass ackwards way to reduce traffic congestion...or what do they think they will buy with the funds gained from congestion pricing?

patsplat Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom

A colleague shared this story a while back. He lost the key to his bike. He got a cordless drill and started drilling out the cylinder of a very solid bike lock. While doing so, the police walked past and said nothing. His thought was - what is the point of this lock, if the police won’t even stop to ask what’s going on?

I’m glad a fellow human helped out in the situation up thread.

don Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom as always - fuck the police.

BeeCycling has moved Sep 26, 2025

@mjr @futurebird @MarkHoltom The police do not give one single fuck about bike theft. They'll give you a crime number for an insurance claim and that's it. No investigation. They might luck into some scally with a garage full of stolen bikes when arresting him for something else, but that seems to be about it.

myrmepropagandist Sep 26, 2025

@mjr @MarkHoltom

Here is the simple rule of thumb for a lock job:

The cost of your bike locks should be at least HALF the value of your bike. If you can't muster that it's not locked up enough.

Of course there are various tamper-proof screws and hardware that are mandatory. If something can be removed with a tool it will be.

I once had my break (I only had the one) stolen.

Both wheels and the frame must be locked. Location is important too.

Gavin Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom Cost aside, it needs to be at least one Gold or Diamond-rated D-lock for the back wheel & frame.

The front wheel also needs to be secured to the stand, especially if it has quick-release. This doesn't need to be as big a lock, unless there is also a bike on the stand more secure than yours. https://soldsecure.com

TheSecondVariation Sep 26, 2025

@gavin57 @futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom I am really lucky that I live in a place were bike stealing is not so much a thing. I do have a very good lock and also nobody here is so honorless to steal your front wheel or your bike saddle. My feeling is also that you really want to think about where you lock your bicycle.

Doesn't help if you live in places like Berlin where your 50 Euro bike will be stolen out of your cellar.

MJ Ray Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @MarkHoltom depends where you are. Village post office and one strong lock is ample. There's not really any lock big enough in parts of London. I reckon they'd find a way to nick a bike buried in concrete in some boroughs!

myrmepropagandist Sep 26, 2025

@mjr @MarkHoltom

In NYC Manhattan and downtown Brooklyn are the worst for bike theft. Oddly enough my bike is fine up in the Bronx. But then I lock it up next to the bikes from the delivery guys next to the old people playing cards.

These things are more powerful than any lock.

BeeCycling has moved Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom I saw some footage lately as a warning not to only put the U lock around the top tube. It showed two thieves turn a bike horizontal over the top of the rack and turn it until the lock broke open, because the tube and the rack were stronger than the lock itself, so that gave out first. 😬

MJ Ray Sep 26, 2025

@beecycling @futurebird @MarkHoltom the #ProperLockIt rule of thumb is two locks, different types but both strong (at least one from LFGSS list, if that's still around), each through a wheel, a frame triangle and the parking stand or fixed object. Bolt cutters, bottle jacks and angle grinders are all more common than thieves doing bicycle gymnastics here, but locking only the top tube enables loads of attacks.

Clinton Anderson SwordForHire Sep 26, 2025

@beecycling @futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom

This is by far the best resource for sourcing good locks and for learning how best to use them.

https://thebestbikelock.com/

#BikeTooter
#OntarioBikeTooter
#Bicycle

The Best Bike Lock

The best bike locks available in 2025. I will also guide you through 3 simple steps to find the right one for you. I've got the ultimate guide on how to lock your bike. And much, much more!

The Best Bike Lock

Kaleissin Sep 26, 2025

@ClintonAnderson @beecycling @futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom For which countries? In my country, with any of those locks, I can't even get insurance. (None of the acceptable locks in my country are angle grinder resistant...)

Clinton Anderson SwordForHire Sep 26, 2025

@kaleissin @beecycling @futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom

Sorry, but your specifics are yours to deal with......

Bill Sep 26, 2025

@ClintonAnderson @beecycling @futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom

I would double check your selection against some of the YouTube lock picking channels such as the lock picking lawyer

Clinton Anderson SwordForHire Sep 26, 2025

@w_b @beecycling @futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom

Even he admits his videos shoildnt be used as indictment of locks.... His skills are exceptional and do not represent most bike thieves.

They are absolutely entertaining though

@futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom

Those cable locks are all but useless. For one thing, the cable is much thinner than it appears. The plastic casing magnifies the appearance of the cable. Secondly, you don't even need bolt cutters. A simple pair of diagonal wire cutters will get through one of those fairly quickly by cutting one or two strands at a time.

Sarah dreams of beans Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @mjr @MarkHoltom I would absolutely watch a channel that rated bike lock jobs! I still remember watching this whole (similar) series which was apparently 15 years ago (edit-- or 22??). I learned a lot and it's fun to chat about bikes in public 🚲

https://vimeo.com/12061685

Hal Grades Your Bike Locking

Vimeo

George E. 🇺🇸♥

🇺🇦🇵🇸🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @MarkHoltom @mjr
If all you have is a bike chain there's really not that many ways you can lock up a bike is there? Provided the chain was wrapped around permanently attached parts of the frame and the bike was secured to an appropriate "spot" I'm not sure what OP could have done differently. If someone is walking around with bolt cutters or a battery operated Dremel there's not much most chains are going to be able to to do stop a determined thief.

Or am I missing something?

Tim McCormack Sep 28

@futurebird @mjr Just today I saw two bikes U-locked to the wires of chain-link fences.

Thinking of carrying around some flyers to put on such bikes to let people know their bikes *will* be stolen by someone who just cuts through the fence.

@timmc @futurebird Depends where. I know of two places people do that, which I won't name, but they're more remote than nowhere and I've not yet heard of a bike stolen from those.

Tim McCormack Sep 28

@mjr @futurebird True enough, but I'm in a dense urban environment where there are a lot of cut chain-link fences.

In a small enough town you don't even need to lock the bike up. People probably even know which bike is whose.

Moté Sep 26, 2025

@mjr @futurebird @MarkHoltom folks, that's not victim blaming if that's not a real story and not even Mark's.

David Chisnall (*Now with 50% more sarcasm!*)Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @MarkHoltom

I had a friend lose a key for a lock like that one, and we found that squeezing the barrel with some garden sheers popped it open. My bike came with a lock built into the back that has a slot for a chain (close it and it immobilises the back wheel). I really like that design and still have one, but the model it came with has the world’s worst lock: you can open it with a key blank.

And no lock works against the attack that a gang did here 10-15 years ago: they came with a forklift and a low loader and pulled up the metal hoops that you attach the bike to. In five minutes, they were able to take an entire bike park. They presumably cut off the locks later.

This is the main reason I haven’t bought an e-bike. My bike looks old and cheap. My main defence against theft is to always park near a more expensive-looking bike.

myrmepropagandist Sep 26, 2025

@david_chisnall @MarkHoltom

The whole bike thing kind of radicalized me because, coming from Ohio when I first moved to NYC and had the brand new 300 bike I bought on my very tight budget stolen (I used a lock like the one in the photo) I went to the police expecting they would be helpful and interested in the CRIME. They were so rude and mean about it I became totally self reliant. I do not need bike theft police. I am my own sheriff.

*cue western music*

David Chisnall (*Now with 50% more sarcasm!*)Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @MarkHoltom

When my father went to university, he had heard that Cambridge had a big problem with bike theft but that cycling was the easiest way to get around, so he bought an expensive bike lock. He parked his bike using it and came back to find that the bike was still there, but the lock had been stolen.

Dave Mc Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @MarkHoltom Most U locks are a 30 second defense with a battery angle grinder.

My tactic is two locks of two different types. Normally a U lock and a cable lock. I know neither provide much defence on their own. Just the thief needs to carry two tools and they're unlikely to have a full tool bag with them.

Ambulocetus Sep 26, 2025

@guigsy @futurebird @MarkHoltom Angle Grinders are too noisy. All you need is the pick designed by Bosnian Bill and the Lockpicking Lawyer. It's faster and quieter. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZtNEC1uGg4

[1242] NYT Wirecutter Says These Are The Best Bike Locks

YouTube

Dave Mc Sep 26, 2025

@Ambulocetus @futurebird @MarkHoltom they requires far too much skill and several minutes. Most bike thieves are fine with noisy and fast. Who is going to mess with an adrenaline stoked bloke with an angle grinder?

MidgePhoto Sep 26, 2025

@guigsy @futurebird @MarkHoltom
Some fibres/fabric seem difficult for angle grinders.
A composite shackle with embedded Kevlar etc might add amusement with spinning threads and a jammed hot disc.

Dave Mc Sep 26, 2025

@Photo55 @futurebird @MarkHoltom even a cable lock isn't easy for an angle grinder. But they're trivially easy with some good long croppers.

the hatter Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @MarkHoltom It's not Mark's bike. Story is 5 years old, https://metro.co.uk/2020/07/02/rail-worker-saved-mans-bike-thief-waited-hours-shift-return-12935219/ Not sure why it's had a recent resurgence in popularity

Rail worker saved man's bike from thief then waited hours to return it

'The world needs more Abduls, he is a legend of a man and a credit to his employer'.

Metro

myrmepropagandist Sep 26, 2025

@hatter @MarkHoltom

I'm desperate for some good news. Tell me again about that one time someone got their bike back.

the hatter Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird @MarkHoltom It's a great story. Miracles do happen. Humans can be thoughtful and selfless.

Spoofer3 Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird maybe you would enjoy https://darknetdiaries.com/episode/153/ on the bike index. https://bikeindex.org/about

Bike Index – Darknet Diaries

Have you ever got your bike stolen? In this episode we dive into the world of stolen bikes. Who does it and where do the bikes go? We talk with Bryan from Bike Index who investigates this.

Trammell Hudson Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird sometimes one u lock is enough.

Kim Sep 26, 2025

@th @futurebird Trick is to have your cycle security spidey sense calibrated for London (or presumably NYC) and then move to somewhere less bike-thief-infested. Your half-arsed locking will be at least twice as good as all the other bikes in the rack, and the best deterrent is an easier to steal bike.

Riding something weird / uncool can help to some extent, but it's not going to so much if theives are willing to strip it for parts.

Sometimes the only cycle security I trust is using my Brompton and keeping it with me.

@th @futurebird

Damn… how did they steal the rest of the bike?

/s

Ewen Bell 📸Sep 26, 2025

@futurebird

I have a mental image in my head, that you return to your bike only to find the U-lock has been stolen!

@MarkHoltom

John G Fitzgerald Sep 26, 2025

@MarkHoltom Bravo Abdul

MJ Ray Sep 26, 2025

@MarkHoltom Great. I wish there was a system in place so Abduls didn't have to stay after their shift, and that the transport police took more action against people found cutting locks.

FreediverX Sep 26, 2025

@mjr @MarkHoltom
The police have never been there to protect and serve the public. They exist to protect capital and intimidate minorities and the poor.