#Tuesday #Journal #Asher

I will have to continue in the morning as this is just to hard to do. G night Fedi, love you all! 🥰xoxo

#Tuesday #Journal #Asher

I have spoke to others with extreme Hyperphantasia snd they all told me, it increases the likelihood of a trauma Groundhog Day. It keeps playing.
Keeping busy helps. Support from friends and family help.

I’m hanging in there.
People have offered me Maine Coone kittens and I just can’t right now.
Then I think,💭 well it’s not everyday people offer up up these cats with all these health checks and markers. The opportunity may not be there?

#Tuesday #Journal #Asher

Things weren’t going great as far as a bunch of things are concerned. Surviving and being poor need to be remedied, however I felt I needed to finish a few projects and I am close.
Well now I am starting the local educational coop on animal.
So that’s a huge thing.

That doesn’t stress me out though.
What stresses me out is seeing Asher everywhere in my thoughts. In my reality, no not a ghost, Hyperphantasia.

#Tuesday #Journal #Asher

I did blog about my journey if you go through my account. I write for myself, and I write for others so if they read it and something seems familiar it may help them understand the language or vocabulary of what I live with and what it’s like.

I narrowed my focus this summer because,
“In my meta awareness I was doing a systems check and realised, I was swimming against the rapids on a bunch of things”
So I went back to basics focusing on self, local community etc.

#Tuesday #Journal #Asher

Mind: I got nothing.
Me: yeah I know you’re a mess too, I’ve tried to be kind to you!

It’s been umm about two months I have felt behind. I imagine a bunch of people feel this.

I was making super good progress. I was remodeling my flat for flow and ease of use pounding those routines and healthy habits with compassion and drive? I guess I’m rechanneling some energy into getting things done.

I’ve been working with my self for 3.5 years since my audhd diagnosis

#Tuesday #Journal #Asher

How did I get my mind to do that?
No idea.
I have had to setup boundaries so my empathy doesn’t kite me around like a yo-yo.
Between that and adhd and autism it’s confusing.
Thankfully I expanded my emotional arsenal to about 124 emotions so far so now I can somewhat trace events to specific actions and emotions.

I have never felt so lost in the fog of life before.

Back to work:
Physically I got in my exercise and many of my tasks done.
I just sat down 🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️

#Tuesday #Journal
#Asher
4/?
It honestly feels like I have to be multiple people.

I need to be supportive to the other kids(cats) they lost their brother too! My partner lost him too and the pain is immeasurable from them.

Side note: I have something some people call hyper empathy, which basically means I feel things from people all the time…

Mostly that which is not said, I notice the micro expressions or lack of. I feel the tensions from people’s body language if it’s variable.