Scrolling through my (semi) recent toots. It's interesting to see ways in which I've tried to capture my gender. Even some recent ones seem off. Yet, I don't think my gender has changed. I've merely learned more about it. It's a complex beast and the fact it's always on the move makes it hard to catch.
I recently said masculine and feminine are just energy and not core genders for me. As of this week, I've settled with demiboy being part of a continuum. In other words it's part of the core.
The nature of my femininity, on the other hand, has been difficult for me to conceptualize. It being energy and more fleeting is fitting. While I've had many moments when demiboy has clearly been the gender of the moment, femininity has been just a seasoning. Over the last three years, I've only had very quick sparks of what I've called glitch girl. That's a rare moment of the energy "materializing" only to dissolve the next moment.
Last year, I went over a phase where I really struggled with whatever my femininity was. Even thought I'm female-aligned. Tried on the glitch girl label as a more consistent label. Yet, it never felt right. It felt forced.
#NonBinary #GenderQueer #GenderFluid