Scoobadood
Russell GarnerThere once was an X from place B
Who satisfied predicate P
The X did thing A
In a specified way
Resulting in circumstance C.
Who satisfied predicate P
The X did thing A
In a specified way
Resulting in circumstance C.
I still have no idea who originally wrote this.
inpcI went out on a nice 90K bike ride and I had to stop halfway through and disallow Tusky from sending notifications about this toot to my Garmin
Bradalot β
βI read all the way to the end,
and was not disappointed.
Matilda LoveThere once was a [person] from [place]
Whose [body part] was [special case].
When [event] would occur,
It would cause [him or her]
To violate [law of time/space]!
Geoff π΄σ §σ ’σ ³σ £σ ΄σ Ώ@matildalove @rgarner We've clearly read the same bash.org thread...
It's always a marvel to me,
For a pendulum hanging quite free,
Each tick and each tock of a grandfather clock
Is 2Pi(sqrt(L/g)).
I still mention this to students at that level (even though it's an approximation).
A mosquito was heard to exclaim,
"A chemist has poisoned my brain!"
The cause of its sorrow
Was paradichloro-
Diphenyltrichloroethane
[EDIT: Corrected bracketing on 2Pi(sqrt(L/g)), thanks Anton]
Extra_Special_Carbon@_thegeoff @matildalove @rgarner Here is a classic my mom taught me.
Johnny was a chemist, but Johnny is no more,
for what he thought was H2O was H2SO4!
@Extra_Special_Carbon @matildalove @rgarner
There once was a lady named Fisk,
Who's fencing was exceedingly brisk.
So swift was her action
Lorentz contraction
Reduced her Rapier to a disc
(This was on the wall of my high school physics lab in the 80s, a teacher who was there at the time, and a colleague today, retires next month.)
Vassil Nikolov | ΠΠ°ΡΠΈΠ» ΠΠΈΠΊΠΎΠ»ΠΎΠ²Another variant (unattributed in my source):
A fencing instructor named Fisk
In duels was terribly brisk.
So fast was his action,
The Fitzgerald contraction
Foreshortened his foil to a disk.
The next one (also unattributed):
A rocket explorer named Wright
Once travelled much faster than light.
He set out one day
In a relative way,
And returned on the previous night.
_________
Both from a collection published in 1978.
Alex is Adjusting
knack@_thegeoff @matildalove @rgarner
I archived the top 50(?) or so on limerickdb before it was lost.
I think my fave is
A woman in liquor production
Owns a still of exquisite construction
The alcohol boils
Through magnetic coils
She says that itβs βproof by inductionβ
@_thegeoff @matildalove @rgarner
Uploaded my archive: https://files.heath.cc/limerickdb.txt
Fish Id Wardrobe β
Virginicus@knack @_thegeoff @matildalove @rgarner
There once was a pirate named Bates,
Who was practicing fencing on skates
When he fell on his cutlass,
Which rendered him nutless
And practically useless on dates.
There once was a pirate named Bates,
Who was practicing fencing on skates
When he fell on his cutlass,
Which rendered him nutless
And practically useless on dates.
AntonWait, I think g needs to be under the square root too...
@anton Good point, well made: 2Pi(sqrt(L/g))
don@_thegeoff @matildalove @rgarner I think I remember the approximation comes from tan(x) is small for small angles?
Return of Aadmaa@donlamb_1 @_thegeoff @matildalove @rgarner
Here you go @donlamb_1 -
The math I'm afraid is in tangles
It's tough for us mortals to wrangle
But here where the angle is small
We can use the approximate law
That tan(x) is x for small angles
David Nash@aadmaa2 @donlamb_1 @_thegeoff @matildalove @rgarner
If your need for precision is keen
It is quite readily seen
That it takes the direction
Of a proportional correction
By squared theta divided by sixteen
Petrichor ααα
ααααααα
cognitively accessible math@matildalove @rgarner I had to make myself hear how it sounded; first read I didn't realize it was a legit limerick (but it wasn't on a thread of them, eitehr).
John R MacMillan@rgarner a few meta-limericks I enjoy but can't credit either:
There once was a girl named Sue
Whose limericks stopped at line two
There once was a man named Dunn
And lastly, the one about Nero
ππ¨π§ πππ«π ππ«
Kerr Avonsen (she/her)@jonberger @jrm @rgarner
Oh that's interesting, it's a variant of the version I know, which goes like this:
There was a young man from Japan
Whose poetry never would scan
When told this was so,
He answered, "I know,
But I always try to fit as many words into the last line as I possibly can."
ARGVMI~1.PIFWelp, that's it. Limericks are now mathematically solved. Everybody go home; we're done here.
cliffordheath@argv_minus_one @rgarner Au contraire! Now we have an algebra of limericks, we still need to find "x", solving for all variables
Admiral Memo@argv_minus_one @rgarner Speaking of mathematical limericks...
Integral of t-squared dt
from 1 to the cube root of 3
multiplied by cosine
of three pi over 9
equals log of the cube root of e.
patxi
Aris Leepvogel, gelukzoeker β
@rgarner Absolutely brilliant.
BenjohnThere once was a charming young miss
Who went down to the river to read.
A man in a punt
Stuck his hand in her eye,
And now when she reads she needs glasses.
NicolΓ‘s DanelΓ³n@rgarner There once was a dev from Milan
Who deployed with no rollback plan
He pushed it at night
Then screamed at the site
And blamed it on poor old Nginx
Who deployed with no rollback plan
He pushed it at night
Then screamed at the site
And blamed it on poor old Nginx
Stuart Celarier βπ@rgarner
There once was a lady from Hyde
Who ate sour green apples and died.
The lady lamented,
The apples fermented
Into cider inside her inside.
There once was a lady from Hyde
Who ate sour green apples and died.
The lady lamented,
The apples fermented
Into cider inside her inside.
Humphrey Archer@rgarner
There is a lady at my weekly writing group who specializes in limericks. I'm sure she will love these
There is a lady at my weekly writing group who specializes in limericks. I'm sure she will love these
Bram Moreinis@screwturn @rgarner not a limerick but I saw this once: roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.