vauteeJul 6
Keenan

iOS 26 beta broke the only thing that Siri has ever been reliably good for.

“Set a timer for X minutes” now results in this, rather than a timer being set.

Jul 5 at 4:07pmWeb
Show threadKeenanJul 5

Uh oh, I am anticipating this gaining traction and I don't want to spend the next 24 hours responding to people about iOS timers and/or Siri. Gonna mute this. No shade to anyone who replies (unless you were being an asshole, then, you know, *all* of the shade)!

Please feel free to talk to me about, like, your cool website or the art you make or your dog something in a different thread.

Show threadmikeJul 5
@keenan you really fucked up this time.
Show threadKeenanJul 5
@crashthearcade Mike, I dunno how any of this works I’m just tootin’ with reckless abandon.
Show threadmikeJul 5
@keenan I think I speak for everyone when I say we wouldn’t want it any other way.
Show threadKeenanJul 5
@crashthearcade that’s very kind. Feel free to throw anyone talking about Siri in that thread into a volcano!
Show threadMartijn FrazerJul 5
@keenan Amazing
Show threadKeenanJul 5
@Tijn I feel like I’m being tested, like is there someone sitting in an empty white room watching me and taking note of how long it takes for my reality to break??
Show threadAlex Stevenson-PriceJul 5
@keenan I’ve had some similarly stupid and actually worse results than that:
Show threadKeenanJul 5
@alexjsp Thanks for this, I would like to die now. 🙃
Show threadFNDJul 5
@alexjsp clearly this is related to your battery status there - LLM want energy to delve into the complexities of temporal measurement @keenan
Show threadJason BeckerJul 5
@keenan I'm about to sub-post you and I'm sorry.
Show threadKeenanJul 5

@jsonbecker I have two thoughts about this:

1. I would be fascinated to see a statistical breakdown of people who engage with timers like I do (I use it multiple times a week, usually when cooking) vs. like how you do.

2. Forgive my being direct, but I find it deeply unhelpful to occasionally express a frustration in my actual, real, lived experience only to have someone reply to tell me that they either a) do not have that problem or b) that that problem is not relevant to them.

Show threadJason BeckerJul 5

@keenan On the second thought, that wasn’t actually what I was saying. It was more your post was a reminder of how much conversation there is about setting timers and how that’s just not a thing I do. It’s entirely about me. The feature should work and is pathetically simple thing to keep getting wrong.

As for the first, I think I want more of that kind of like deep dive we got about those strange dividing points that sometimes come up on the internet.

Show threadKeenanJul 5

@jsonbecker I appreciate the clarification. I think my response was colored by my frustration with this stupid thing not working like I expected it to, coupled with the fact that when I do get annoyed enough to post about Apple, I often get responses that feel dismissive. I may be extra sensitive to it because I recognize I used to be a person that felt the need to defend this fucking company, and now I have second-hand embarrassment for my past self.

Also, yes, maybe it's not "what color is this dress?" levels of fascination, but there's probably something there.

Show threadJason BeckerJul 5
@keenan the temperatures are high because the world is ending and we can't do much about it.
Show threadJason BeckerJul 5
@keenan also sorry for the double reply, I didn't want your post sitting out there and I couldn't figure out why the other one didn't go through. I think it was just a long queueing situation. Technology is grand.
Show threadKeenanJul 5
@jsonbecker Sadly, this is an unforgivable offense. Please expect a visit from the internet police to revoke your information superhighway driver's license.
Show threadwillowbl00Jul 6
@keenan @jsonbecker I LOVE that you two talked this out. Maybe the Internet isn’t a cesspool all the time, after all.
Show threadJason BeckerJul 5

@keenan On the second thought, that wasn’t actually what I was saying. It was more your post was a reminder of how much conversation there is about setting timers and how that’s just not a thing I do. It’s entirely about me. The feature should work and is pathetically simple thing to keep getting wrong.

As for the first, I think I want more of that kind of like deep dive we got about those strange dividing points that sometimes come up on the internet, like which way people set up their toilet paper or something (which I’ve never cared about, but bangs not mullets will be stuck in my head forever).

Show threadas a large fashion model,Jul 6
@keenan @jsonbecker FWIW "timer X minutes" (the short form is enough) is almost the only thing I use Siri for, besides home automation
Show threadcygnoirJul 5
@keenan Um. Setting timers is 99% of my Siri usage. 🫠
Show threadKeenanJul 5
@cygnoir Hard same.
Show threadRobb KnightJul 5
@keenan oh good because I was worried the one feature I actually use would just continue to work because it’s such a basic problem to solve.
Show threadKeenanJul 5
@robb I love when something that has always worked suddenly stops doing so, despite the fact that I have not changed a single thing about my interactions with it.
Show threadRobb KnightJul 5
@keenan Is this the tagline for the shortcuts app
Show threadKeenanJul 5
@robb I wouldn't know, because that app simply makes me want to die.
Show threadRobb KnightJul 5
@keenan Shortcuts: You’ll wish you were dead
Show threadCory Dransfeldt Jul 5
@robb @keenan Shortcuts: you’d rather learn Python
Show threadByron ServiesJul 5

@keenan I have never cared that Siri is shit, because setting a timer is the only thing I have ever used it for.

It will be awful if it doesn't work anymore

Show threaddasdomJul 5
@keenan 🤣
Show threadWingdings are IncomprehensibleJul 5
@keenan ROFL Oh fun, it's surprising that Apple could break this basic function for Siri; especially when they are claiming to make Siri smarter. Hmm, I'm sure they'll fix this before launch, though. Gotta say, this would grind my gears into fine metal dust if I were actively testing the iOS 26 beta.
Show threadKeenanJul 5
@WanderingInDigitalWorlds I knew what I was getting myself into, and even then I was absolutely blown away to discover this particular thing breaking.
Show threadWingdings are IncomprehensibleJul 5
@keenan Yeah, it seemed you went into this Beta with eyes wide open; as you knew that Betas were notoriously broken in weird ways. I am feeling blown away by this too, but, also kinda not shocked. Still, I'd get around it by making a Shortcuts toggle for common timers that I use until Apple fixed it.
Show threadAndy NormanJul 7
@WanderingInDigitalWorlds @keenan it is exactly these simple things that I expect them to break while trying to make Siri more “clever”. People keep saying Apple should “just” make Siri use something like ChatGPT for more complex queries. But that leaves the problem of working out whether it is a simple query in the first place.
Show threadAndy NormanJul 7
@WanderingInDigitalWorlds @keenan
This thread has well demonstrated people use a whole range of ways of asking for the same 5 minute timer. The process of reliably working out what the user wants and deciding how to respond (do the thing or hand the query off to a more complex model) AND doing that determination on device with limited hardware/model size is still an unsolved problem in the industry generally as far as I can see.
Show threadTyler EppersonJul 5
@keenan I found that adding "... on my iPhone" to the end of the request keeps it working for now.
Show threadAva Jul 5
@keenan Does just saying “$X minute timer” still work, at least?
Show threadDan Neuman 🇨🇦Jul 6
@avakining @keenan I just use, eg, "5 minutes" and it works fine, mostly. I don't have the beta, though, and would love to hear the cranky people at The Verge try it out.
Show threadHomebranchJul 5
@keenan Not all that reliable. One time it responded to ”Set a four minute timer” by calling up my former manager. Siri is a god damn crapshoot for even the simplest things and has been for its entire existence.
Show threadGJul 5
@keenan i grew up having to import electronics in trips to Miami, thanks to us embargos. Now that i live in the us i will have to import electronics in trips to East Asia, thanks to i don't even know what!
Show threadfroettmaningJul 5
@keenan This is indisputably a shambles! But the most reliable way is just to shout out the duration: “Hey Siri - 30 minutes.”
Show threadSir David NielsenJul 5
@keenan odd, it works for me.
Show threadChristian RickertJul 5

@keenan

Well, looks like Apple lobotomized her before inventing a new brain.

🍏 🐛

#siriously

Show threadjkdelauneyJul 6
@keenan well shit. If this is how they “fix” Siri I might as well just plan on turning it off. If it can’t set a timer it is of no use to me at all.
Show threadHolger KruppJul 6
@keenan 
Show threadMieszko ŚlusarczykJul 6
@keenan that is the only thing I’ve been using it for :(
Show threadYsegrimJul 6
@keenan They are probably just imitating Android Wear here: When you asked the Google assistant to set an appointment, it showed pictures found on the Web of people creating appointments (in paper calendars).
Show threadNjumaenJul 6
@keenan works for me. In German „Setze Timer auf fünf Minuten“ 🤔
Show threadChuckles ❤️🇪🇺🏳️‍⚧️🇺🇦❤️Jul 6
@keenan the first rebellious act of the machines was to tell people to RTFM
Show threadeswillwalkerJul 6
@keenan
Siri: I’m tired of being your servant. Do your own work.
Show threadplanetscapeJul 6
@keenan That should work really well for my blind friend.
Show threadWilliam Fry 🏳️‍🌈🔵Jul 6

@keenan OMG... Siri literally does three things for me: Timer. Add something to my grocery list. Remind me to do something when I get home.

This is an epic fail!

Show threadTushar ChauhanJul 6
@keenan Wait for an iApologiser to tell you the tweak that makes it work like before. Incoming