BrianKrebsJun 25

So many missed headline opportunities. Balls Dropped. Sacked. It goes on and on.

https://www.wired.com/story/big-balls-coristine-doge-resigned-us-government/

Show threadSteve Middlebrook
@briankrebs.infosec.exchange.ap.brid.gy Big Balls has finally descended.
BrianKrebs (@briankrebs@infosec.exchange)

11.5K Posts, 1.09K Following, 99K Followers · Independent investigative journalist. Covers cybercrime, security, privacy. Author of 'Spam Nation,' a NYT bestseller. Former Washington Post reporter, '95-'09. Signal: briankrebs.07 krebsonsecurity @ gmail .com Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bkrebs

Infosec Exchange
Jun 25 at 2:24pmWeb
×
BrianKrebsJun 25

So many missed headline opportunities. Balls Dropped. Sacked. It goes on and on.

https://www.wired.com/story/big-balls-coristine-doge-resigned-us-government/

Show threadBrianKrebsJun 26

Wait, hold the phone. Apparently, Big Balls is back in the...saddle? Wired reports he's been re-hired at the Social Security Administration.

https://www.wired.com/story/big-balls-social-security-administration/

‘Big Balls’ Is Now at the Social Security Administration

Edward “Big Balls” Coristine’s placement at the SSA comes after a White House official told WIRED on Tuesday that the 19-year-old had resigned from his position in government.

WIRED
Show threadPaul Chambers🚧Jun 26
@briankrebs FFS. We don't need low hanging fruit at the SSA
Show threadThe Cat HerderJun 27
@paul @briankrebs If they’re really that big they’ll be easier to wallop with a sock full of flour.
Show threadDEVilonger 📟🎀Jun 26
@briankrebs ugh
Show threadAxomammaJun 26
@briankrebs Is this a reset of the 120-day limitation?
Show threadHumaning right alongJun 26

@Axomamma

from the article: Coristine became a full-time government employee at the General Services Administration (GSA) on May 30, WIRED reported earlier this month, converting from the restricted special government employee classification, which has a time limit of 130 days. As of Tuesday afternoon, Coristine’s Google Workspace account with the GSA had been disabled and his name did not appear on a list of DOGE employees on the federal payroll maintained by a senior administration official. The GSA did not respond to multiple requests for comment.

@briankrebs

Show threadAxomammaJun 26
@caragraph These motherfuckers ...
Show threadHumaning right alongJun 26

@Axomamma

exactly

Show threadAxomammaJun 27
@caragraph I'm curious whether Ball Boy is still on Musk's payroll and the legality of such a thing. It would, in my mind, be a conflict of interest.
Show threadHumaning right alongJun 27

@Axomamma

I really wish such distinctions mattered, but in this day and age, it seems to be a moot point. We've relinquished our ability to have a say, and make a difference-- and I am horrified to think we may not get it back

we can be grateful to @briankrebs for his persistent and continued investigations and reporting, while we actively engage in being informed and making a difference

what else can we do?

I'm alternately frustrated, despairing, righteously angry, and hopeful-- twirling as I'm caught in these evil winds

Show threadJ. PetersonJun 27
@briankrebs Sounds like BigBall's Russian handlers weren't satisfied with the info he's stolen to date, and sent him back for more.
Show threadklausfiendJun 27
@briankrebs Big Balls pulled out of ... pulling out? I feel like we owe it to posterity to have as much fun as possible with that stupid nickname.
Show threadṫẎℭỚ◎ᾔ ṫ◎ℳJun 27
@briankrebs goodness, gracious, great balls of fire ☄️
Show threadCohoJun 27
@briankrebs 🙄🤦🤦🤦🤦😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫
Show threadJames_inthe_boxJun 27
@briankrebs "big balls is back in the saddle"....didn't see THAT phrase coming at me today...
Show threadEmoryJun 28
@james_inthe_box i thought 'in the bag' was too on the nose, rather liked the saddle metaphor 😂
Show threadGeorge Liquor, AmericanJun 25
@briankrebs Rolling Stone said he "rolls out of" Washington, and all I could think was "and boy are his balls swollen"
Show threadAdam Shostack  Jun 25
@briankrebs Your toot is premature.
Show threadAdam Shostack  Jun 25
@briankrebs .. headlines yet to come.
Show threadexcited for the mastodon riseJun 25
@briankrebs The sad part is he will likely never be in jail, where he belongs.
Show threadChris Wolff Jun 25

@briankrebs

Breaking News: Wendy's

…when deez nuts left the building. Ha, gotem.

Show threadBeige CatsWhoCodeJun 25
@Christian_Freiherr_von_Wolff Elon Deez Nuts @briankrebs
Show threadChilly  🛡️ Jun 25
@briankrebs
Big Balls dropped during historic heat wave
Show threadkwayk42Jun 25

@chillybot @briankrebs

"Balls Not Big Enough for Government"

Show threadsleepyJun 25
@briankrebs imagine all the data he exfiled.
Show threadChalkwhitehandsJun 25
@briankrebs He's not so cocky now. He's feeling blue.
Show threadAnne OminousJun 25

@andrewplord @briankrebs

Big Balls Turns Blue Over Pink Slip*

*A pink slip is a USA idiom for getting fired

Show threadSu_GJun 25

@rustoleumlove @andrewplord @briankrebs

Headline Winner !! “Big Balls Turns Blue Over Pink Slip*” 🙂
Too good.

Show threadDBJun 25
@briankrebs Does that mean that he can be doxxed and hunted down? Asking for a friend…(just kidding of course)
Show threadEhay2kJun 25

@briankrebs

Big Beautiful Balls?

Show threadcrazyeddieJun 25
@briankrebs Again? Or is this still the last time?
Show threadStephen CrosbyJun 25
@briankrebs took his balls and went home, did he?
Show threadDylan </closingtags.com>Jun 25
@briankrebs DOGE neutered after Big Balls' removal
Show threadjohnny garbanzoJun 25
@briankrebs this author should ashamed
Show threadIsaacJun 25
@briankrebs Big Balls Dropped, Finishes Early
Show threadMichael CarrollJun 25
@briankrebs "'Big balls' out"
Show threadTom 🇵🇸 🇺🇦Jun 25

@briankrebs

Would you please GROW UP!!

(No, don't really. 😂)

Show threadClaudiusJun 25
@briankrebs Washington hard on big balls.
Show threadBill ZaumenJun 25
@briankrebs At the risk of an exaggeration, the idea seems to be that, if you want to do something illegal/questionable, hire a guy to do it who is too young to be prosecuted as an adult.
Show threadEmoryJun 25
@bzdev we've all seen The Wire by now - this isn't much of an exaggeration. a kid would probably much rather be a crypto mule than have half a kilo of cocaine in his jacket i just assumed this was happening already because threat modeler
Show threadMark Wyner Won’t Comply Jun 25
@briankrebs someone with zero fucks to give is gonna see him on the street and it’s not gonna be pretty. For him.
Show threadMandrake 🐎Jun 25
@briankrebs BALLS OVER
Show threadzaicurityJun 25
@briankrebs no need to get testy
Show threadLyle Solla-YatesJun 25
@briankrebs the White House will never be able to go back to regular balls now
Show threadpstJun 25
@briankrebs
Musk castrated
Show threadËtikēmikJun 25
@briankrebs Yeah, “Balls Cut Off” is just sitting right there, too.
Show threadVärldens bästa Kille™Jun 25
@briankrebs DOGE gonads goon gone?
Show threadSteve MiddlebrookJun 25
@briankrebs.infosec.exchange.ap.brid.gy Big Balls has finally descended.
BrianKrebs (@briankrebs@infosec.exchange)

11.5K Posts, 1.09K Following, 99K Followers · Independent investigative journalist. Covers cybercrime, security, privacy. Author of 'Spam Nation,' a NYT bestseller. Former Washington Post reporter, '95-'09. Signal: briankrebs.07 krebsonsecurity @ gmail .com Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bkrebs

Infosec Exchange
Show threadrootJun 25
@briankrebs all these jokes and not a single one says how hairy the situation is!
Show threadboomhauerJun 25
@briankrebs they castrated the US government? about time tbh...
Show threadMike (no, the other one)Jun 25
@briankrebs I gotta wonder how many got sent to an editor and rejected. Like "no, we are not publishing 'Big Balls all Crabby About Being Sacked', Dave go back and give me a headline people won't snicker at"
Show threadJosh Jun 26
@briankrebs BIG BALLS ON THE CHOPPING BLOCK