Mastodawn

zrike Dec 16, 2023

Ricki Yasha Tarr

Don't dress slutty, but please try to be sexy.

Be on the alert for predators at all times, this is your job, because they can't just be expected control themselves, but don't be afraid of all men...somehow.

You need to be strong, but not too strong, you don't want anyone to feel emasculated.

You need to want to have children, you have a womb, you just have to use it, but please don't let the children interfere with anything else you need to do. We are already doing you a favor giving you eight weeks of unpaid leave!

Be very thin, but also eat cheeseburgers and drink beer, because we don't want to acknowledge that for most people, being very thin involves not eating enough.

Be vulnerable and emotionally available, but I swear to God, if you cry at work, or express anger about anything, you're going to make everyone uncomfortable, HR needs to talk with you.

I get that you're working full time and 3 other people live in your house, but it's you're fault it's not clean enough, and did you really get take out again?

You need to have it all, but don't expect any hand outs.

Be smart, but don't show off, EVER, be demure, let them think it was their idea.

You need to be funny, but don't try to get attention, and don't snort laugh, and not too dirty, please don't mention your period!

And ffs, would it hurt you to smile?!

Ricki Yasha Tarr Dec 15, 2023

If this doesn't apply to you, it's not about you.

Max Leibman has moved!Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr The only people mad at you for making this toot are the ones saying things in it.

Steve Gisselbrecht Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr
Evergreen!

cognitively accessible math Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Sigh. I wish my current stuff hadn't drifted rather hard in this direction the past few years.... Well spoken.

Michael Gemar Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Anyone who doubts women’s strength just needs to look at all the shit they endure, because men are so weak.

🔥Cassandra🔥Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Right on. Fuck that.

@RickiTarr Hashtag ‘Things people say to women’ 🔥🔥🔥

Stuck Here Dec 15, 2023

Please let me paraphrase for you, because the testicles give me the right...

Be a person but only the type of person a patriarchal society prefers. Otherwise you're doing it wrong.

Now go about your business and be awesome! Just don't outshine me.

/s (some symbol I got to using so that people on other platforms wouldn't jump down my throat and know I'm kidding. Yes, it kills the vibe but I'm a sensitive Wooly Mastodon.)

Ginny Bee (she/her)Dec 16, 2023

@MyWoolyMastadon i think /s is /=end of, s=sarcasm

you might also see

/rant

Mycotropic Dec 15, 2023

I wish you beige types lived near Denver because I'd cover your beers on my tab all the damn time. Also I hope my daughter grows up to piss off literally everyone including me!

Skepticat 😸Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr
My entire 63 years. 🤬

Lundemo Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr @dabertime At work: “It’s not WHAT you said it’s how you said it” when how I said it mainly involved being a woman in a room full of men who thought I should have known my place.

Edelruth, PBS Passport Holder Dec 15, 2023

I was going to add the smile, and there it was, slipped in at the bottom like the shiv it is.

Well done. No notes.

SteveP 🇨🇦Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Barbie covered this nicely, but apparently it was "too preachy"

Steffani Cameron Dec 15, 2023

@stevecantsmell @RickiTarr yes, that’s why it made the most money of all time because it was too preachy.

SteveP 🇨🇦Dec 15, 2023

@snarkysteff @RickiTarr we all sure learned our lesson. (mini fridges are stupid)

Flowermob Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Owwww.

Imran Nazar ~ عمران نزر Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Lauren Mayberry's writing for Chvrches covers this in multiple tracks, but He Said She Said from their most recent album is very succinct: https://youtu.be/fyyiJc0Wk2M

"He said 'You need to be fed, but keep an eye on your waistline'; and 'Look good, but don't be obsessed', 'Just think it over'"

CHVRCHES - He Said She Said

YouTube

Justine Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr This was my (67) life.

Canadian Crone Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr it’s time for a #MatriarchalSociety. #EnoughIsEnough with patriarchal misogyny. Women have had enough.

SFborn1940 Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr ....but not too thin.

Diligence Jones Dec 15, 2023

This made me think about the ways these messages would be slightly different for Black women.

Huh.

Ricki Yasha Tarr Dec 16, 2023

@DeliaChristina Oh lord, I can only imagine! I have a friend switched to a "white voice" when she was on the phone, because she said it was easier and people took her more seriously, and I was just like, Well fuck, that's a whole new layer.

Ginny Bee (she/her)Dec 16, 2023

@DeliaChristina @RickiTarr tbh I bet it's almost a completely different list, and one I'm sure I would learn a lot from.

Diligence Jones Dec 16, 2023

@fixiemama @RickiTarr

It's on my list to write about this weekend.

If my damn dog will stop begging me for treats and scritches.

Virginia Murr Dec 15, 2023

Absolutely perfect.

👏 👏 👏 👏

We Should Bury This Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Jennette McCurdy writes in I'm Glad My Mom is Dead about how the irreconcilable paradox of her character on "iCarly" being obsessed with food and always eating while, simultaneously, in real life she was being shamed by her mom and show/studio execs about her weight contributed to her eating disorder.

無夢星球 Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr “you should have your own opinions but never say it if you disagree with men, cause men are so sensitive that they always need to be protected as a baby.” 🌚

PirateRo Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr you’re prettier if you smile…

Spooky Panda 🏳️‍🌈Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Very well said. I have NOTHING to add because you've said it all. Wow.

@RickiTarr Yeah that is incredibly accurately worded.

Aviva Gary Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr perfection 😁

AskPippa🇨🇦Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr To add to this, don't forget the things women say to (and about) other women in the workplace. I've gotten these: "You'd be more confident with a better hair cut." (btw I have no trouble with confidence) "You should wear makeup, you'd be more professional." "You're so thin, I hate you." "You should wear shorter skirts to show off your legs." And a I've had women say this to me about others: "She's too heavy to wear leggings." "She's someone who should never wear skirts above her knees." "Her legs are too chubby." "She should never wear a 2-piece." "How did she get that promotion, she must be sleeping with someone."

TeflonTrout Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Is your husband on here? I've got a problem with the way you post

William Conner Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Thank you for this. I recognize this is partly humor and partly satire.

I have two adult daughters - one is a doctor of Physical Therapy (DPT) who has encountered these things to a limited extent. Daughter 2 is a certified professional engineer (electrical, P.E.) and has encountered it more because of the "non-traditional" role of women in STEM.

READERS: Take care not to perpetuate these idiotic statements. Overall, women are as or more capable than men for their chosen roles.

Stu Duerson, machina exo deus Dec 15, 2023

You got me!!! Checking my caffeine level as I type. I read the first 3 paragraphs thinking, "My God, she's gone off her nut!"

Seán Fenian Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Our society is so broken.

Pets Save the Day Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr
Worth a watch
https://youtu.be/EsY9c9WodcE?feature=shared

Barbie - Women Speech (America Ferrera)

YouTube

Ricki Yasha Tarr Dec 15, 2023

@Petprez I've seen it, it's great

ex3mpted 🇵🇸Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr Go off, absolutely fire toot 🔥🔥🔥
Hope all can see its true meaning and burn it into their minds.

Bob Jamieson Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr What!! You are bleeding from your vagina? Take yourself off and sit in your period hut until you stop. Seriously, why do periods have to be taboo?
Why is it shameful for a woman to be seen naked by a man accidentally, but merely embarrassing for a man?
Why are there double standards when we should be equals?

cthululemon Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr
I don’t get it. I’m a man and I’ve literally *never* been told any of these things.

Joris Meys Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr can recommend. Insightful book for those confronted with ... well, other people basically.

EliJ quilter Dec 15, 2023

@RickiTarr 😐😮‍💨😟😠😡🤬

Sophia 🎶☃️🩵✨Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr As I used to say in my early 20's: Men like women, who are thin and eat a lot of unhealthy food. Men like women, who shit a lot.

Medea Vanamonde🏳️‍⚧️ ♀Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr thank goddess I’m a lesbian

Anca Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr 🔥. Just so you, I’m reading this with America Ferreira’s voice from the Barbie movie in my head

Miriam2k22 Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr Don't change a thing, darling, it's perfect. But here are some notes, when can you have these finished by, honey?

Don't rush it, no deadline, but the sooner we have it, the better it'll be received. You want your team to like you, right?

You're still here? Close the door on the way out, the boys and I have other matters to discuss in private.

Patsy Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr you have to know the rules in order to break them 😜

Catherine is not complacent Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr oh so sadly true. Walking a barbed wire high wire in bare feet but don’t let them see you bleed.

TJtreehugger2 for Harris Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr @TLB73 Perfect.

Guido Jansen Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr ashamed to admit this is an almost perfect description of our patriarchy. Even more ashamed when I observe myself contributing to it. Needs work and daily self questioning to overcome, I have no clue how long it’ll take us

🇪🇺🏳️‍🌈Dec 16, 2023

Spot on 👏👏👏👏👏

Nick Vendome Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr Ugh! I’m tired just reading this. And we didn’t even get into the whole working mom w/ several kids routine & a “workaholic” husband who does his best “work” at the pub every night, depleting your savings while you help the kids w/ their homework. Yes — still smiling! 😅

Amish Super Model Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr And if you do snort laugh, make it sexy!

Ponygirl Dec 16, 2023

@RickiTarr Brilliant!!!