Elon: "please post your videos on my platform where nobody will be able to find them and they will immediately be flooded with blue-boosted crypto scammers and schizos in the replies."
Lol that dude isn't posting shit to Twitter until Mush puts his John Hancock on a massive contract and the check clears. Mr. Beast is gross, but he knows which side his bread is buttered on.
Jesus christ, this is like reddit meltdown levels of posting.
What a sad man.
Apparently twitter is the new wingnut welfare
Very cool to start paying the worst posters for their dogshit takes, way better than paying severance.
data $0 (we aren't paying our cloud suppliers anymore)
rent $0 (we aren't paying our rent anymore)
krassenstein payments $24305
utilities $0 (see above)
someone who is good at the economy help me budget this. my company is dying
suing 4 john does
lol good luck
we will answer the questions. What questions? the important ones. they’re easy to answer we just haven’t asked them yet. we will find out what questions to ask. we will find the questions to the answers to the universe, and then we will be the ones who have all the questions
hey look a nerd reference, give me 44 billion dollars
just like with gab and parler etc. the right-wing absolutely hate being in their own echo chamber because then they realise they're all antisocial freaks with shit-stained undies and zero friends
they crave having liberals to wrinkle their nose at the smell of said undies and frown at their absolutely dogshit takes
So predictable, he thinks he's in control, and that this gives him leverage over his pet chuds, and everyone else will just shut up.
Pat yourself on the titanium plate buddy!
So everyone in the list of payees was manually given a thumbs up by Twitter for payouts, probably Elon personally.
These are the brand ambassadors he has chosen.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/technology/2023/07/13/twitter-creators-payments-right-wing/
I can't wait for Elon to create Tay 2.0
if they're training it on twitter data I bet Elon also had them scrape the shit out of reddit
the big lol is that elon has neither the business vision of what to do, the managerial capacity to implement it, nor the stomach for taking losses until his plan is implemented. every other week he wakes up in a cold sweat thinking about those mounting losses and freaks out and does something like fire more people or make another dumb edict like this one.
of course his fans don't understand that so he can just act like it was already failing and he's fixing it
this must have felt so nostalgic to him
https://edition.cnn.com/2023/07/17/tech/ghana-twitter-layoffs-severance-intl-hnk/index.html
Elon Musk is the richest despite being obviously and visibly incompetent.
There's no secret scheme. There's no deliberate plan. He's just that bad at this and has nobody to save him from himself. He's making what he thinks are the best decisions to run a platform because he's the World's Greatest Engineer and he's got solutions all these other idiots haven't thought of yet. When his decision blows up in his face, he blames someone else and goes on to his next blunder.
lmao cat turd is having a full on meltdown because he wasn't one of elon's hand chosen recipients of a big bag of cash for posting and now his life means nothing
this is the inevitable outcome of being a musk stan
I just hope they finally learn something from it
Elon's having himself a day
1. Doesn't understand the quote
2. Questions about my "not the CEO" shirt etc.
3. Pay me money to avoid any fraud enabled by my company. #NotExtortion
The Explosive Finale of The Twitter Files
Falun Gong! Hell yeah! Get that energy wheel spinning!!!
Just taking $44 billion and lighting it on fire.
imagine given up (whatever small) brand recognition twitter has for... X.
twitter has managed to get people to use "tweet" and "tweeting" as nouns and verbs.
"Yo dawg, just X me the deets"
we're only just beginning to imagine what this company is or will do, which is a very good position to be in, having purchased it almost a year ago
zombo.com has a better pitch than this
I'm still not sure if she's just there to collect a paycheck and doesn't give a fuck about anything else anymore (understandable), or if there's some actual thought process behind those words beyond saying what musk wants
I'd assume the former for almost anyone, but she's a marketing exec so who knows
Here he is STILL MAD that they wouldn’t run PayPal on windows NT in 1999
Even if you knew nothing about the state of webscale hosted services on windows vs *nix, which he clearly didn't and somehow still doesn't, what the fuck would video game development have to do with hosted service infrastructure in fucking 1999?
like, what platform was fucking hotmail being hosted on in 1999?
hint: it was not windows
it's me, the ceo, looking to spend our entire yearly revenue on hardware and sql licenses to build something slower and less reliable than we have today
If he has sunk cost fallacy / buyer's remorse over paying too much for x.com back in 1998 I can only imagine what he's going to be doing with the long-dead twitter brand in 20 years.
lol one of his stooges is gonna report on more of twitter's internal politics
but now it'll be ~the x files~
it isn't fucking "minimalist" "art deco" you tool you don't have any fucking idea what you're talking about aghghggghhhh
also can we just take a moment to appreciate how bad these all are?
Hilariously enough there is a chance that, since Twitter is incredibly fucking popular in Japan, the stupid rename will lead to Twitter Japan being known as X Japan... which is the name of one of the most famous rock bands in Japan.
Amazing foresight by Musk, literal brain genius
"Thanks for the name, idiot. You want all this Twitter shit we're throwing away?"
https://mashable.com/article/elon-musk-twitter-take-x-handle-from-original-user
Elon's sycophants getting pretty tinfoily once again. These morons will never be satisfied lol
Strangely, banks sometimes refuse to deal with people because of things they said, too. Like "I hate paying my bills on time" is a good example.
is it back or is this just another case of the twitter backend struggling for eventual consistency?
who knows!
even the backend people at twitter might not. could be an issue with something no one left at the company knows about, or it could be elon making changes to prod directly without telling anyone. they'll know when he tweets about it, same as everyone else
this man is the biggest idiot there is. here's a little story.
we are all pretty sure that the spark that lit the fuse here was the @elonjet account. the world's richest man was furious that some teenager was using publicly available data to report publicly on the movements of his publicly registered airplane through public airspace (this reaction was caused by amphetamine-induced paranoia).
first he tried to give the kid a tesla, an offer which was sensibly declined.
then he tried to pay him off for reportedly some amount under $10,000, which was also declined. after this rejection elon had a poopants hissy fit and started buying up twitter stock through third parties, accumulating nearly 10% of the company and failing to disclose same in the legally required way. presumably he was planning to gain some amount of leverage with the company and force them to disable the account.
a few months later, it became apparent that elon was doing this.
the twitter board, sensibly not wanting to let musk start dictating terms, agreed on a plan. they would invite elon to join the board, but simultaneously implement measures that would prevent him from owning more than 15% of the company.
when elon heard what the board had in mind, he shit right through the seat of his pants, got blasted on adderall and ketamine, and ordered his lawyers to make an offer to buy the company outright. we all know how it proceeded from there.
but that instigating event, the elonjet account. how he was so mad that anyone could track his jet and see where he was going?
the FAA already has a program to let aircraft owners obfuscate transponder IDs. you apply for the program and after some back and forth you can have an alternate id that is not registered to you in the civil aircraft registry.
https://www.faa.gov/air_traffic/technology/equipadsb/privacy
elon musk actually did enroll in this program, but the incompetent yes-men who work for him bungled the job and didn't program the alternate id into the plane correctly, letting the @elonjet account continue to track him.
https://www.vice.com/en/article/7kx8wa/emails-show-spacex-bungled-elon-musks-private-jet-privacy
a month after elon discovered this fuckup, he started buying twitter stock.
the end
big ol' lol, but you know, not. because he did that, and he's done it to others, and he keeps doing it, and no one is going to stop him
and no one is ever going to try to sue him for defamation again after what happened to vernon unsworth
Everyone asking what kind of person would still work at Twitter, now you know.
"Hunt Hunt the woke bird. Skin em alive and eat them bones!!! I do this act for Elon!"
While some longtime users decried the demise of the Twitter brand, a group of zealous X employees swept through the San Francisco headquarters on mission to purge remnants of the old brand.
lmao it just keeps getting dumber and dumber
@cspam ummm...yes. hello...
extra dimensional simulation creators...
What the fuck is this reality you have "made"? Holy fuck. You're bad at it.
All I'm getting from this is that Oreo advertising dollars support neo-n*zis.
Oh well, it's almost a month old. Hopefully they've stopped.
Unsworth of course had the misfortune to have the least competent trial counsel one could have (Lin Wood, who has been good at getting settlements, but incompetent at trial (though early onset dementia can't be ruled out)).
@cspam
I'm sur they know how to change a handle. But they can't abandon the @twitter handle, they have to leave it. So many things point to it, so many web pages all over the world.
They could code so that @twitter would redirect to @x but while there's existing tools for literally any user to change their handle, that sort of redirect might be new, and might be hard, and they might not know how to do it.
@cspam "According to Hwang, the company now formerly known as Twitter did offer "an alternative handle with the history of the @x account" so that his original account, complete with its posts and followers, could live on and continue to be used.
What short, catchy username did Musk's company change Hwang's handle to? @x12345678998765."
@cspam well, at least now he has the redirect from x.com to twitter.com up and running.
Seriously.
That's playing a seriously long, expensive game.
Twitter Death Cult
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