Charlie Stross

Over on twitter I am seeing how long it takes the mods—if there are any left—to hit on me for hurting Elon Musk's feelings by renaming myself.

Currently I'm up to "Elon Musk swives goats" (having skipped "fuck" because that's low-hanging fruit for bluenose bots), having started with "Elon Musk sucks goats" and, well, you get the picture.

Am thinking of ramping up to "Elon Musk swives goat clunge" tomorrow morning.

Any suggestions for where to go next?

Nov 6, 2022 at 8:41pmWeb
Show threadsnowchyld Nov 6, 2022

@cstross goatse

iykyk

elon goatse musk

Show threadRonathon Livingston SeagullNov 6, 2022
@cstross Perhaps use this as your profile photo? My account was locked for using it, and I never even had a bluecheck.
Show threadHighlandLawyerNov 6, 2022
@cstross Try some Scots- "Elon Musk bolt ya rocket" might be sufficiently confusing.
Show threadZoë 🏳️‍🌈🇺🇦Nov 6, 2022
@cstross Are you opening a book on this? If so, I’ll take 37 hours please.
Show threadRui CarmoNov 6, 2022
@cstross I don’t think you’ll get any reactions, really.
Show threadMarcus Nov 6, 2022
@cstross how about Elon drinks goat piss?
Show threadkexlineNov 7, 2022
@marcus @cstross That's a nice callback to other accounts that have been shut down for impersonation.
Show threadCautionWIP 🇨🇦🏳️‍🌈Nov 6, 2022
@cstross Elon Musk drastically misunderstands animal husbandry, creates new breed of goats.
Show threadInfinimitsuNov 6, 2022
@cstross ideally, you write a python script that has a list of names to pull from and changed the name automatically at a given rate.
Show threadRob LandleyNov 6, 2022
@cstross I'd say "hit him in the ego" but dude bought a company that MAKES expensive red sports cars for his quarter century crisis. His ego's so big and fragile I'm not sure what counts as a vulnerable spot?
Show threadRidley KempNov 6, 2022
@cstross Don't want to run afoul of the moderators here, but you could use the expression here used to describe the caver who criticized him. You know, the phrase he said was common in South Africa.
Show threadFish Id WardrobeNov 6, 2022
@cstross "is a"?
Show threadWGAvanDijkNov 6, 2022
@cstross - In Dutch, we would say "Elon Musk is een geitenneuker" (which is a rough translation of what you said), and I am pretty sure the bluenose bots can't handle Dutch slang.
Show threadHis Royal ChiggnessNov 6, 2022
@cstross add "for a nickel" to the end. Or maybe "for eight bucks".
Show threadJoachimNov 6, 2022
@cstross where to go next? You’re on the Fediverse, you’re already there :)
Show threadAngela Glansbury 🚽Nov 6, 2022
@cstross
My suggestion is ignore him, I don't think he's worth a moment of your time. What's your endgame here and how does it match your values.
Show threadHenry W. LamingtonNov 6, 2022
@cstross Elon has a short one. That always works.
Show threadCarl MuckenhouptNov 6, 2022
@cstross If the goal is to sneak increasingly rude things past the censor, you can always go Gaiman with it: "Elon Musk felches goats"
Show threadSeiðrNov 6, 2022
@cstross How about "Elon Musk Biblically knows farm animals"?
Show threadBad Ad JokesNov 7, 2022

@Illuminatus @cstross

Goat:

Musk: BE NOT AFRAID

Show threadyunchtimeNov 6, 2022
@cstross
I thought @thematthewcooke had a good point in his Nov 4th tweet in direct reply to Musk: "Nobody believes a word you say. You lost all trust when you used your 44B purchase to troll a violent crime victim sitting 2 seats from the presidency. Now we're credibly investigating whether you're a full-blown anti-government chaos agent working with foreign powers."
Show threadKristian LumNov 6, 2022
@cstross so apparently mastodon is also good for teaching me new vocabulary.
Show threadspafNov 6, 2022

@cstross Not sure I have an exact suggestion, but I will note that some goats are kinda adorable.

Pigs, on the other hand, ... and blobfish...

Show threadGaz 🐻Nov 6, 2022

@spaf @cstross unfair to the blobfish. That's just how they handle pressure.

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/in-defense-of-the-blobfish-why-the-worlds-ugliest-animal-isnt-as-ugly-as-you-think-it-is-6676336/

In Defense of the Blobfish: Why the 'World's Ugliest Animal' Isn't as Ugly as You Think It Is

The blobfish is the world's ugliest animal. But we don't think the contest was very fair

Smithsonian Magazine
Show threadspafNov 7, 2022
@cstross Just saw the note from Mush on Twitter than impersonation that isn't labelled as parody will result in permanent suspension. FYI.
Show threadMedea Vanamonde🏳️‍⚧️ ♀Nov 6, 2022
@cstross not sure If you are still up by The Must Eloi us back on line after 24 hours of silence and on a rampage
Show threadSpeakerToManagersNov 6, 2022
@cstross how about “Elon Musk sucks goatse”? One small step for a sentence, a giant step for insult.
Show threadTonyCNov 7, 2022
@cstross Elon Musk felches goats.
Show threadBrian SwetlandNov 7, 2022
@cstross Supreme Leader Musk has declared that there shall be a Twitter Death Penalty for any Impersonation. So I assume it's just a matter of time before the two unpaid interns remaining in ToS enforcement get around to banning everyone making fun of him...
Show threadAnita Larkens Nov 7, 2022
@cstross still up
Show threadMaggie KatNov 7, 2022
@cstross "Elon's dad says his son will never measure up"
Show threadStuart B. 🌐🏅🇨🇦 🇺🇦 🇺🇸Nov 7, 2022

@cstross - Mastodon isn't another instance of cesspooling like on the bird-site.

You are free to do as you wish over there but this is not the place for rage farming.

Show threadUnwelcome GrokeNov 7, 2022
@cstross This is good work.
Show threadunixjunk1eNov 7, 2022
@cstross If you want to get his attention, disparage cryptocurrency or spacex in the name change? That'll get you noticed if not reported in minutes :-)
Show threadAshley M GjøvikNov 7, 2022
@cstross I'm envisioning a thread of only slightly modified Bloodhound Gang lyrics
Show threadMark SlaterNov 7, 2022
@cstross With the volume of postings, account names and profiles comments of that nature over there at the moment, you’re a grain of sand in a Martian planet wide sandstorm. Chances you’ll get noticed are minuscule - esp. if you’re progressing into increasingly rustic vocabulary.
Show threadPutnamPuppeteerNov 7, 2022
@cstross "elon musk tongues goat rectum"
Show threadmumuNov 7, 2022
@cstross just go wild
Show threadPepe The GoblinNov 7, 2022
@cstross mention the fact he didn’t found Tesla but merely invested in it and then sorta took it over from its creators. He doesn’t take that very well
Show threadMike BartleyNov 7, 2022
@cstross maybe forget twitter and the work-experience kid running it. There are more pressing issues. Jam goes on after the cream.
Show threadBlueShiftNZNov 7, 2022
@cstross Have you considered the possibilities of caprine smegma?
Show threadCardboard RobotNov 7, 2022
@cstross I'd suggest packing up and leaving the platform. Seems like the most potent punch at this point, could be wrong.
Show threadAezyNov 7, 2022
@cstross any unused conspiracies from the Halting State series that could be applicable?
Show threadStefan SchollNov 7, 2022

@cstross that’s so immature!!

Please continue. 😀

Show threadBad Ad JokesNov 7, 2022
@cstross whatever you do, would adding "in exchange for handjobs" be too far past the pale?
Show threadFroodyNov 7, 2022
@cstross honestly Charlie, you’re better than this. Just ignore the man. He can’t help himself and twitter is a business; us folks never had any control and it may in the end be for the better that the illusion is shattered.
Show threadhaihappenNov 7, 2022
@cstross I could supply some German variations, e.g. "Elon Musk gurgelt Bullenklöten". Thete could also be a language replacement for musk itself: Gestank, Mief, etc
Show threaddampscotNov 7, 2022
@cstross gets dingied by goats?
Show threadJudge999Nov 9, 2022
@cstross What have goats done to be the only animals to suffer what not expand to elephants , sharks or slugs
Show threadGodzilla Died for Your SinsNov 9, 2022
@cstross Maybe mix it up a little? "Elon strangles kittens to achieve orgasm"?
Show threadScimon ProctorNov 10, 2022

@cstross Elon Musk flicks goats?

In the right font...

Show threadaresNov 14, 2022

@cstross

we've dealt with enough malignant narcissist authoritarians in the last six years to know that they get off when their name is mentioned in any context, positive or negative

we also know that ridicule is their kryptonite

so maybe we should mock them and laugh at them while never speaking or writing their names

can we agree that it's "elmo" from now on?

Show threadMrOpinionNov 21, 2022
@ares @cstross Elno