Esp., these past few decades.
While surely historically and before today, so much of this now has to do with social media...
#CallOutCruelty
#ProtectPeople
https://substack.com/profile/289465856-jz-murdock/note/c-217393018
JZ Murdock (@jzmurdock1)
We’ve seen far too much of someone attacking another in public from an ideological perspective. Esp., these past few decades. While surely historically and before today, so much of this now has to do with social media, polarization via the same, political parties and grandstanding self-involved influencers. When someone in public targets a gay person, a trans person, an immigrant, or other minority, we’re not trying to “win a debate.” Just trying to: Protect the person being targeted. Reframe the behavior. Raise the social cost of cruelty. Here’s approaches that can work in live situations. 1. Name the Behavior, Not the Ideology Avoid arguing policy. Call out the conduct. Example: “You’re not debating policy right now. You’re singling out a person.” “This isn’t about immigration law. You’re targeting someone standing in front of you.” Reframe the moment from abstract ideology to visible behavior. 2. Separate Policy From Personal Attack Most ideologues justify cruelty by claiming they’re defending principles. Interrupt that narrative: “If you want to argue policy, fine. But attacking someone personally isn’t policy.” “Disagreeing with a law doesn’t require humiliating a stranger.” Force them to confront that their bad conduct is unnecessary to their stated goal. 3. Appeal to Strategic Self-Interest Many activists care about optics and influence. Use that. “This is exactly the kind of behavior that turns people away from your cause.” “If your goal is persuasion, this isn’t persuasive.” “You’re hurting your own credibility right now.” Shift the cost-benefit calculation. 4. Use Social Norm Pressure Ideologues often rely on perceived audience support. “Most people here don’t want to see someone bullied.” “This isn’t how adults handle disagreement.” “We can disagree without attacking people.” Calm, firm tone matters more than volume. 5. Center the Targeted Person Sometimes the most powerful move is to ignore the aggressor and support the person targeted. “Are you okay?” “You don’t have to respond to that.” Stand beside them physically. This denies the aggressor the spotlight. 6. Don’t Over-Explain Long moral lectures escalate. Short statements work better: “That’s not okay.” “Leave them alone.” “Stop.” Clarity > cleverness. 7. Safety First If the person is escalating or unstable, sometimes it’s best to leave the person they are attacking to deal with it. If you see they are not overwhelmed, if they appear to be sensible and patient, they may know what they are doing, have handled this before, or have dealt with this individual before. Be ready to help but read the social cues: Do not argue. Create space. Alert staff/security if appropriate. Document if necessary. The objective is de-escalation, not rhetorical victory. What Actually Shuts It Down? Not facts. Not ideology. Not counter-outrage. What shuts it down is: Removing the moral high ground. Making the behavior look small. Raising social cost. Protecting the target. We’re not going to defeat their (and not infrequently today their bizarre, or toxic) worldview in that moment. We’re just interrupting harm. Be safe out there. We need to simply be there sometimes to help others be safe, too.

