#NarcissistDictionary: “I hate you!!!”
When a #narcissist, #borderline, #histrionic or other #ClusterB variety pack says, "I love you" it doesn't mean "I love you" the way it does to a normal or a #codependent. Their declarations of love are intense, but superficial. “I love you means” they see you as all good in that moment.
A #NPD, #BPD or #HPD loves you when you make them feel good about themselves. They love you when they're getting everything they want. This is the pleasurable side of splitting.
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#Narcissists, #borderlines and #histrionics love the way toddlers and teens love. Their construct of you is dependent on their immediate ego and feelings states. This is why you can be their soulmate on Monday and by Thursday they’re sharing photos of themselves with their newest soulmate.
Just like kids often have a new #FavoritePerson every few months. The instant there's a disappointment, frustration or a new shiny object they drop their best friend.
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Alternately, "I hate you" actually means they hate you. Ultimately, narcissists hate everyone and respect no one. They hate you because:
• You see their limitations, flaws and pathology.
• You told them no.
• You held them accountable for lying or cruel behavior.
• You're not okay with their cheating.
• You don’t #enable them anymore.
• They can’t possess your goodness and talent.
• You didn't buy them a pony.
What does love mean to you? Does it mean suffering abuse to prove you're a good and loyal person? Does it mean allowing someone to hurt you in the hopes that they'll love you? What's your half of the equation?
If you’re confused because they ping pong between loving you and hating you, then be confused no more. These individuals are incapable of enduring mature adult love.
#AbuseHasNoGender