Since I’m new to JavaScript, I wrote:

𝚒𝚏 (𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔) { 𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔(); }

…like an idiot. Then, I realized I should be adapting to JavaScript culture and make it inscrutable, so I re-wrote the line to:

𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 && 𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔();

But I suspected there was something even more nightmarish, and sure enough, of course. This is how _real_ JavaScript developers do it:

𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔?.();

And by “real JavaScript developers,” I mean “monsters”.