abadidea5d ago

Company wide email last week: there is an emergency patch for some software you’ve never heard of. Please update manually NOW; if it’s not patched by Tuesday, your machine will forcibly reboot.

Me: o software management portal of my work machine, is this software even installed, that I might update it?

portal: it’s not installed, no.

[Tuesday comes]

Your machine is going down NOW in the middle of the workday because you FAILED TO INSTALL THE PATCH, SINNER.

Show threadabadidea

reader, the patch management system appears to have forcibly installed the vulnerable software in order to patch it.

thank gods! that was a close one

Apr 7 at 1:48pmWeb
Show threadThe Waveform Conglomerate5d ago
@0xabad1dea lmao WHAT
Show threadQueen of Anxiety5d ago
@0xabad1dea wow
Show threadDJGummikuh5d ago
@0xabad1dea stupid morons exist in every company in every department... 🤷
Show threadspell5d ago
@0xabad1dea amazing
Show threadKevin Mirsky 5d ago
@0xabad1dea *begins to type angry email to desktop team*
Show threadinfosec_j5d ago
@0xabad1dea I maintain that computers were a mistake and we should have stopped at the printing press
Show threadfuzzyfuzzyfungus5d ago
@infosec_j @0xabad1dea Be careful. Woodblock/offset plate is OK; but Gutenberg's fast, cheap, and out-of-control 'movable type' nonsense is just asking for a world of integrity and availability problems.
Show threadcaranea5d ago
@0xabad1dea
🤣 Classic. But hey, at least your machine is safe again! (at least until the next emergency patch)
Show threadAgnieszka R. Turczyńska5d ago

@0xabad1dea "Compliance"

See also: https://circumstances.run/@agturcz/116362599345241424

Agnieszka R. Turczyńska (@[email protected])

Content warning: Work related noise

GSV Sleeper Service
Show threadYossi5d ago
@0xabad1dea now they can tell management that they patched 107% of vulnerable computers.
Show threadImpeach||GTFO 5d ago
@0xabad1dea that is the most US federal government thing ever to happen outside of the US federal government
Show threadLucas Treffenstädt5d ago
@0xabad1dea I was gonna joke that clearly, the right thing to do would be to install the vulnerable version first. I didn't think anyone would... actually...