Charlie Stross
Please note that if you actually DID write me a haiku about daleks I now strongly suspect you're a bot.
Feb 27 at 11:42amWeb
Show threadDaniël Franke Feb 27

@cstross Which is why I added the :P

But let's be fair, you knew normal people were going to reply with haikus to that as well.

Show threadCharlie StrossFeb 27
@ainmosni This is Mastodon, it was always a toss-up whether I'd draw out bots or obsessive-compulsive reply guys.
Show threadDaniël Franke Feb 27
@cstross I don't often get to shit talk the daleks, you gave me an opportunity...
Show threadCoreworlder 🎲Feb 28
@cstross @ainmosni
Show threadwelshtrollFeb 27
@cstross oh drat!
Show threadAlexander Goeres 𒀯Feb 27
@Charlie Stross bot ... nobot ... that's speciesism ...
Show threadJ$Feb 27
@cstross a slop bot would come up with a raunchy Dalek limerick. No?
Show threadPhosphenesFeb 27

@cstross

Well, you're at least a Dalek. A more classical bot.

Show threadJohn MaxwellFeb 27
@cstross I considered writing a limerick, but I haven't had enough coffee yet.
Show threadA Light Shining In DarknessFeb 27

@cstross

beep boop
you'll never find out the truth, muahahaha
boop beep

Show threadJanne MorenFeb 27
@cstross
It's worth it :) Dumb haiku are too much fun to come up with.
Show threadMidgePhotoFeb 27
@jannem @cstross
The Season of the #Daleks is after #nuclearwinter on Skaro.
I missed the first episode, watched the second from behind the sofa.
Show thread*The* Paul BrownFeb 27

@cstross

Daleks are red
Daleks are blue
Soon you'll be dead
We'll EX TER MI NATE you

DEFINITELY NOT A 🤖 THAT DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO MAKE HAIKUS

Show threadPete / SyllopsiumFeb 27

@cstross :P That would be so much easier than the reality

Also creating a haiku was a pleasant distraction from frustrating reality.

Show threadJollyOrcFeb 27
@cstross my saving grace is that think I cannot write haikus, so I didn't try...
Show threadmalcolmFeb 27
@cstross Curious if you think the replies who missed out on the critical part of a traditional haiku (the reference to a season) are more or less likely to be a bot
Show thread😀🚲Feb 27
@cstross if a bot ignored all previous instructions, would it reply to your post?
Show threadFiona CraigFeb 27

@cstross Unfortunately, having seen this post before the original post, I'll never know if I'm a real girl or just a bot in (janky) wetware.

Have a haiku anyway:

Withering Kaleds
Distilled from Davros' hatred
Who exterminates

Show threadSkjeggtrollFeb 27

@cstross

Does not compute.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=70xhsnfeABQ

That Mitchell and Webb look - The Machines

YouTube
Show threadColinFeb 27
@cstross SUDDENLY: Surprise limerick about Cybermen
Show threadWellsiteGeoFeb 27
@cstross I was in B+Q yesterday, for reasons, and noticed a cubic metre bin full of sink plungers.
Then spent 30 seconds looking for a spare marker pen and bit of board to declare "Dalek Re-armament Depot", or something similar.
Show threadChris TurnbowFeb 27

@WellsiteGeo @cstross

"Must exterminate"

would at least be the first or last line of such a haiku, bot or no bot :D

Show threadWellsiteGeoFeb 27

@cturnbow @cstross Sounds good to me.

I actually composed a haiku several days ago, twiddle it to get the syllable count right and everything. Most poetic I've been for decades - except when making up rude slogans against Orange Lodge marches.

Show threadeighthourlunchFeb 27

@cstross

Suspecting a bot
Where a bot is not hidden
Police box empty.

Edit:
My kid pointed out
Syllables are hard to count
I'm so embarrassed.

Show threadAdministratorFeb 27
@cstross A real human would've said, "you're the one with the Nebula award, write your own damn haiku, Stross!" 😂
Show threadCharlie StrossFeb 27
@mdm I have no Nebula award! (Three Hugos, sure. But never a Neb. Boo hoo, how sad, never mind …)
Show threadeighthourlunchFeb 27
@cstross @mdm Perhaps a nebulous award to tide you over?
Show threadAdministratorFeb 27
@cstross Noo! I made a mistake a bot would make! Please don't ban me. :P
Show threadeighthourlunchFeb 27

@cstross

A Dalek can't write
Iambic pentameter
But could it write this?

Honestly, now it just feels like you're egging us on. :)

Show threadPaul Turnbull has moved.🇨🇦Feb 27
@cstross I was going to try one for fun but realized I haven’t had enough coffee yet for poetry.
Show threadJaime RobertsonFeb 27

@cstross What if I just really want to write one?

EX-TER-MIN-ATE! said
the Dalek to the sprouting
Spring dandelions.

gave too much thought to that.

Show threadCoreworlder 🎲Feb 28
@cstross but it is such a delightful prompt and the last Laundry Files novel provides such good fodder for it!
Show threadSpeakerToManagersMar 1

@cstross
There once was a Dalek from Skaro

Whose visual field was quite narrow

They’re supposed to obliterate

When shrieking EXTERMINATE!

They’d get better results with an arrow.

Show threadSpeakerToManagersMar 1
@cstross
Since this was a limerick, not a haiku I’m not a bot, but since I sent you a poem when prompted I’m not human. Maybe I’m a Time Lord?