A look at one of the most pressing problems of 2023: the lament that "the left" wouldn't be friends with "the right," over "political views."

Defining these terms and dealing with a strange spectacle: the world's most unfriendly people, demanding friendliness.

https://www.the-reframe.com/if-you-want-to-be-friends-then-why/

If You Want To Be Friends, Then Why Aren’t You Friendly?

A look at one of the most alarming and pressing problems of our age: the much-lamented fact that "the left" won't be friends with "the right," over "political views."

The Reframe
@JuliusGoat
🎶 why cant we be friends 🎶
(because of your misogyny)
🎶 why cant we be friends 🎶
(because of your race hate)
🎶 why cant we be friends 🎶
(because of your transphobia)
🎶 why cant wee bee frieends 🎶
(because yoou aare genociiidal)
@JuliusGoat the people that say that empathy is a weakness asking for empathy.
@javier @JuliusGoat not ‘asking’, rather they are ‘demanding’ empathy.

I laugh every time at how the most hateful sexist pigs of men bemoan the fact that they can't get dates because of "politics". When someone wants to loudly and proudly declare that they don't think anyone like you deserves human rights like the ability to control your own body or be able to say no, or have a job or how many children you want to have or whether you can leave an abusive relationship or whether you should be hired and promoted based on how good you are at your job...

Yeah not exactly the sort of person you want to enter into a relationship with, put yourself into very vulnerable positions with them.

@JuliusGoat

@JessTheUnstill @JuliusGoat its not as much an obvious problem in this country but only because many Brits are devious and can *pretend* not to be full on fash so they can get friends/relationships (particularly IRL) - then quietly express their bigotry on social media (especially using nicknames or services which allow fine grained limiting of what others (even friends) might see from someones timeline)..
@JessTheUnstill @JuliusGoat in some ways its more fucked up -the stereotypical lonely incel in his family home isn't that common, whats more common is a fashionable young man with a wide friend circle and a girlfriend/wife/kids who starrs off OK but then goes apeshit on social media about foreigners / lockdowns / traffic laws etc and slowly goes down rabbit hole and alienates everybody, its a big reason why there are many split families and angry divorced middle aged men online)

@vfrmedia @JessTheUnstill @JuliusGoat I met my partner through OKCupid (in the early days when it sucked less). She told me that I wasn't the highest match score, but I was the highest who wasn't a right wing asshole lying his ass off.

The strange part is that the lying is immediately obvious. But then, I suppose their model of relationships, transactional at best, puts no value on honesty.

@foolishowl @JessTheUnstill @JuliusGoat these days a lot of (British) rightwingers won't openly lie as such but simply "won't discuss politics" (although they are likely to lie about other things on a dating site such as income/occupation)
The weirdest is when guys lie about height. Like their date won't notice that they're shorter than they claimed? I mean maybe if you're only fudging by an inch, but beyond that? Really?
@vfrmedia @foolishowl @JuliusGoat

@JessTheUnstill @foolishowl @JuliusGoat

Vladimir Putin, Rishi Sunak (former UK Prime Minister) and Volodymyr Zelenskyy are all around the same height as myself (1,65m) - its interesting to see both the media (including their various PR/propaganda units) giving wildly varying figures for their height (metric to Imperial conversions are also an opportunity to fudge figures) plus Putin and Sunak's creative use of shoes/boots to look taller 😁 (Zelenskyy does not appear to do this)

@JessTheUnstill @vfrmedia @foolishowl @JuliusGoat

Also id really (hypothetically) kinda rather be closer to my partners height, makes it a lot easier to kiss ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

@ashley @JessTheUnstill @vfrmedia @JuliusGoat I did find it curious that when I was dating, I didn't have a preference for height, but almost every woman who initiated contact with me was within an inch of the same height.

On the other hand, the last time I had my height measured at a medical checkup, it was 5' 11 1/2", and I hadn't realized how much that lost half inch mattered to me.

@foolishowl @JessTheUnstill @vfrmedia @JuliusGoat

Oh, yeah, I don't really have any preference for height, it's just more convenient. I'm actually like 6'3 and it's,,,, well everyone I've dated has been varying levels of shorter than me lmao
@foolishowl
As a tall woman I do give you permission to round up :3


CC:
@JessTheUnstill @vfrmedia @JuliusGoat
@JessTheUnstill @JuliusGoat
I truly hate how people are shitty, and then expect to be able to leave that out of relationships. It's some of the same reason men have tended to be scared when certain places started to have women in them, because they only feel safe with all their bullshit when there aren't women around, which makes me a "threat", to their safe haven of shitty behavior.
@JuliusGoat That battery of questions at the end is like a disinfectant for gaslighting.

@JuliusGoat

Gee, why won't I be friends with racists that are gleefully letting the people of this world suffer and die. Hmmmm, that is a puzzler.

@JuliusGoat
the right wing: the world's most unfriendly people, demanding friendliness.

How pathetic... no wonder they avoid self-awareness, self-loathing is real.

@JuliusGoat Excellent essay! And relevant to anybody who hasn't yet decided who they're voting for in #Elxn2025 in Canada.

@JuliusGoat

Republicans drilled it into the public: politics is stuffy, boring book stuff that everyday voters shouldn't concern themselves with, and 'politics' can't hurt you.

Like no one reads the rules to Monopoly, you got one dope that played before telling you how, real quick, because learning sucks when doing is way cooler. Gimme the fucking racecar or I'll end-up gay.

Human Lives are Not politics in any way, shape, or form. But we've been packaged to buy and sell each other.

@JuliusGoat "The tolerant left? They're on the other side of town." #fascism #uspol #nazis
@JuliusGoat One of the main tenets I've noticed about white supremacy and other forms of bigotry is that they always want 100% access and 0% accountability. They will never see any form of paradox between their actions and their desires because it's not relevant to that goal.
@JuliusGoat Reading Matt Walsh's blog post, in addition to the raging bigotry, I get a strong note of profound unwillingness to accept that children change as they grow.

@JuliusGoat

Nonchalantly sadistic party wondering why the - actual - victims aren't licking their boots.
-
Proof that hatred has a well defended echo chamber.
The rest of us at least - occasionally - subject our beliefs to doubt, to make sure they're still true.

@JuliusGoat If friend, why not friend-shaped?