emmett (they/he)Apr 8, 2024
Russell Garner
Have you noticed that these days when time travellers grab you by the shoulders and ask what year it is, when you reply "2024" they no longer say "Thank God. I'm not too late"?
Apr 8, 2024 at 10:03amWeb
Show threadRussell GarnerApr 8, 2024

I dredged this joke from my own moribund Facebook feed. I told it six years ago today. Didn't even get one Like.

I guess the zeit has amplified some geist.

Show threadWeaselApr 11, 2024

@rgarner @[email protected]

Back then it was just "too soon" for that joke.

Show threadJack of all tradesApr 8, 2024

https://mas.to/@jackofalltrades/110305772115183897

😔

@rgarner

Jack of all trades (@[email protected])

Attached: 1 image It's like in the movies: just because you know the future doesn't mean you can change it. #climateChange

mas.to
Show threadCourt Cantrell does not complyApr 8, 2024
@rgarner What's worse is when you say 2024 and they break down in tears of joy, saying, "Oh, it worked! It worked! It's all so much better now!"
Show threadRussell GarnerApr 8, 2024
@courtcan ah, the absolute worst: libertarian timelords
Show threadCourt Cantrell does not complyApr 8, 2024
@rgarner Half a tick, looking for the nearest Dumpster... 😆🖖
Show threadBilly SmithApr 8, 2024

@rgarner @courtcan

So which timeline did they come from...?

One of the timelines where the planet was destroyed in a nuclear war? :D

Show threadCourt Cantrell does not complyApr 8, 2024
@BillySmith @rgarner RIGHT?!
Show threadDec [{()}]Apr 9, 2024
@courtcan @rgarner
This was basically the plot of "Timescape" by Gregory Benford, with the future being 1998.
Show threadCourt Cantrell does not complyApr 9, 2024
@dec23k @rgarner Okay, I thought for sure I'd seen a movie of that, but apparently there isn't one. So I really need to read this novel. Thanks for the (inadvertent?) recommendation! 😄
Show threadDec [{()}]Apr 10, 2024

@courtcan @rgarner
The time travel in "Timescape" is done with messages, not people moving through a portal. It's pretty good about the need to avoid paradox.

Excerpt available here: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/11313/timescape-by-gregory-benford/

Timescape by Gregory Benford: 9780553297096 | PenguinRandomHouse.com: Books

Winner of the 1980 Nebula Award, Timescape has since become a classic of the science fiction genre, combining hard science, bold speculation, and human ...

PenguinRandomhouse.com
Show threadRussell GarnerApr 10, 2024

@dec23k @courtcan "Remember to smile a lot, John Renfrew thought moodily. People seemed to like that. They never wondered why you kept on smiling, no matter what was said. It was a kind of general sign of good will, he supposed, one of the tricks he could never master."

Oh fuck they've got *my* number

Show threadDec [{()}]Apr 10, 2024

@courtcan @rgarner
Don't go near the Wikipedia page if you want to enjoy reading the book (especially if you haven't read it before).

Not only does it spoiler most of the plot, it explains a lot of elements that the reader is supposed to work out the hard way.

Show threadUrban HermitApr 8, 2024
@rgarner you remember that, do you? Hmm.. Have to do something about that.
Show threadStevenSavage (he/him)Apr 8, 2024
@rgarner it's the maniacal laughing that really gets to me.
Show threadJake in the desertApr 8, 2024
@rgarner you're right. I get grabbed by the shoulders a lot and I never hear that anymore
Show threadMartin EscardoApr 8, 2024

@rgarner

Whenever I reach 2025, a time traveller offers me to go to the past, either keeping my memory or erasing it. Apparently, I've chosen to go back to 1984 repeatedly, with my memory erased for the sake of my sanity.

But this time the time traveller came earlier and told me that I have to endure the coming dystopia. And instead of erasing my memory she made it seem like her appearance was a dream. But I am sure it was true.

Show threadEdelruth, PBS Passport HolderApr 10, 2024

@rgarner

Alas!

Show threadTxomin70Apr 12, 2024
@rgarner Es cosa que ya sabíamos todos que Netanyahu es simplemente una marioneta de EE.UU.
Show threadSteve HerseyJul 3, 2025
@rgarner
Yeah, the response is usually "Oh, <expletive>," then they reach into their pocket and abruptly disappear.