Do you get, or have you ever had, recurring nightmares?
If so, what were they about? What was the atmosphere like? And - if you remember - what were your feelings in them? Was there anything else notable about them, or making them different from other dreams?
Interested in your stories.
What would your interactions with people be if you didn’t have the trauma responses, but you had the ability to attune?
I’m also working on getting to a simple explanation. Yesterday I had another two chances to test out my explanation (yay Christmas…)
I know I’m taking liberty with many definitions, but I’ve found exactness gets in the way.
A little more structured than I could in the conversations:
My brain thinks more, my brain and body feel more than “normal” people do. Where feel is not only touch and the internal feelings of my body, but sight, sound, smell, taste, and emotions.
With think I mean not only cognitive analysis, but also remembering, planning, daydreaming, worrying, fantasising, etc.
And both thinking and feeling are not only more often, but also more intense.
This landed.
Then I explained that I lack the ability to “numb down” on most of the impulses I get.
I used the example of how I keep getting jump scares from fireworks explosions long after other people are just watching the show. Or how I can’t filter out the noise of vacuuming, or that irritating label in my T-shirt.
So, everything, all the time, at the highest input they can imagine, without a knob to turn it down.
What I didn’t say in either conversation yesterday:
This is why I like my quiet time, this is why I don’t like crowds, this is why I have a hard time falling asleep, this is why I either can’t focus/ get lost in thought, this is why I like predictable things, this is why I “just think too much”, this is why I like the numbing drugs, this is why I don’t have many friends.
It helped me, hope it helps someone else too.
I’ve been trying to explain two autistic / AuDHD experiences that I have to a non-autistic loved one for a couple of years now, but I’m finding it really hard!
1. The first: difficulty with uncertainty.
I explain this like it is an anxiety that diminishes the more information I gain that reduces the levels of uncertainty. But the word “anxiety” makes my loved one interpret it as always being about fear, just like anxiety usually means more generally. E.g. fear, on any level, even minor, of a potential negative event happening in the future. But I am not always afraid or worried, so this interpretation doesn’t work. It’s purely the uncertainty itself I find hard to deal with, and I can experience this around things I enjoy and when know there will be no negative outcomes at all. It relates strongly to disliking surprises. E.g. if I am walking from A to B and someone suddenly bumps into me, I HATE that! But if I choose to walk in a busy crowd, I expect people to bump into me and it’s totally fine. I hate being uncertain whether someone will bump into me or not, too.
2. The second topic can be totally separate or experienced together with the first: anticipation!
I have also tried to explain this as like a form of anxiety, but I have frequently felt this anticipation before hugely and purely positive events! It relates to something coming up soon that I am not familiar with. Familiarity in this sense usually only happens when I have either done things so frequently in my life that I can’t forget it, or I’ve experienced it about 3 or so times in the last month. This means revisiting a favourite restaurant that I haven’t been to for a year would cause this type of anticipation. The anticipation often stops me from being able to sleep the night before and my mind is often running through how the event might unfold, planning and so on, even if all the plans are already made and all preparation already done. As I said before, this often happens with purely positive events, so it’s so strange to explain it!
I suspect that these two experiences are very common for autistic people, and the latter, anticipation, probably affects lots of neurodivergent people. I wondered if my ADHD is influencing the anticipation, for example, and maybe I’m just wanting to remember what I need to do for the event since I likely can’t use a routine for something unfamiliar to me? I don’t know! In this case, perhaps anticipation WOULD be classic anxiety since it relates to fear of forgetting something important or losing track of time. But sometimes it’s just an impatient feeling.
What do you think?
Does anyone else experience these two things? Perhaps in a different way to me? If so, how would you describe it to someone who has never experienced it?
What can someone do about all the times when one was bad, and/or inadequate, and someone else was hurt ?
It was autisme, partially. But still...
What if a meltdown wasn't a "bad" thing, but a signal that you're having trouble coping with something? Or that you need something you're not getting?
#AskingAutistics #ActuallyAutistic #BurnoutRecovery #Sensory #Interoception
Can you read while there is audible language around you? Talking, shows, music, etc.
As for me, that’s a strong no.
#AskingAutistics #ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD #Neurodiversity #Sensory #Interoception
I struggle to rest and recharge as an #AuDHD because I need mental stimulation and I get bored easily with classic rest (watching a show doing nothing elese ? NOPE)... But maybe there is a form of active rest ? Activities with low sensory input ? What do you think ?
#actuallyautistic #askingautistics #actuallyadhd #askingadhders #askingadhd #askingaudhd #askingaudhdists
(Edit to replace "Netflix and chill"... Seems used to say something else 😬)
What's the autistic version of the ADHD tax? How does it cost you more to go through life because you're autistic?
Katy Elphinstone
Heather Cook🖖Autistic Coach
⠠⠵ avuko
JB 🐎 
Aevole
Dr. Figuring-things-aut