Mastodawn

Finished up our flower planting from last weekend to take my mind off of things.

Didn’t really work, so I instead spent my Friday evening being productive and beginning inquiries to both DMM (daily money management - i.e. bill pay) and GCM (geriatric care management) providers.

Both parents are falling apart and my sister an I are trying to be proactive. We’re not in any crisis yet, but it’s safe to say the storm clouds are gathering.

#SandwichGeneration

Jonathan Kamens 86 47 May 15

Tonight was an extremely shitty night in the elder-care department. Buckle in, this is a long rant I need to get off my chest.
#elderCare #careGiving #sandwichGeneration #narcissism #scams
1/19

Jonathan Kamens 86 47 May 14

I don't remember whether I've posted before about how Uncle's Adult Protective Services caseworker and the caseworker's supervisor both basically ghosted me, stopped paying Uncle's rent from his Social Security checks which they were managing, without notifying either Uncle or me that they were going to do that, and before doing that sent a rent payment which was totally the wrong amount for some hitherto unexplained reason.
#elderCare #careGiving #sandwichGeneration
(1/3)

Longreads May 12

"I hope that these stories make you feel less alone in the intermingling joy and grief that caregiving up and down the generational line elicits for so many of us."

https://longreads.com/2026/05/12/intergenerational-caregiving-courtney-e-martin/?utm_source=mastodon&utm_medium=social

#IntergenerationalCare #MultigenerationalCare #SandwichGeneration

‘This Was Our Life’: A Reading List on Multigenerational Caregiving

Five stories on the overwhelming, profound art of caring for other people.

Longreads

Jonathan Kamens 86 47 May 8

A hard thing about trying to care for Uncle from several states away is I need to rely on other people and people let me down repeatedly.
I repeatedly asked the people who promised to gather up Uncle's incorrectly unforwarded mail and ship it to me to search his apartment for mail and make sure to send me all of it.
Today after several months' hiatus I finally made it to Uncle's apartment and found multiple piles of mail they didn't send me.
🤦😡
#elderCare #sandwichGeneration #careGiving

Jonathan Kamens 86 47 Apr 30

Fun and games with #elderCare by the #sandwichGeneration…
Uncle missed a specialist medical appointment yesterday because the medical transport van scheduled to drive him to the appointment arrived an hour late, and by the time he got to the doctor's office, the doctor was gone.
Today I called to reschedule the appointment.
#healthcare (1/4)

Jonathan Kamens 86 47 Apr 10

Last year NYC's Human Resources Administration (specifically, Adult Protective Services) took over receiving Uncle's monthly Social Security checks, paying his rent out of that income, and then sending Uncle the remainder via paper checks (direct deposit not offered as an option *sigh*).
#elderCare #sandwichGeneration (1/8)

jflannigan360 Apr 9

Caregiving from miles away comes with guilt, worry, and impossible choices. Practical insights for those navigating this difficult distance.
Read here: https://www.onecaregiversjourney.com/long-distance-caregiving-challenges/

#Caregiving #LongDistanceCare #ElderCare #FamilyCaregiver #SandwichGeneration #CaregiverSupport

jflannigan360 Apr 2

Caregiving from miles away brings unique challenges. Practical strategies and emotional support for those navigating this difficult distance.

Read here: https://www.onecaregiversjourney.com/long-distance-caregiving-challenges/ #Caregiving

#LongDistanceCare #ElderCare #FamilyCaregiver #SandwichGeneration #CaregiverSupport

James Stegall Mar 20

The sale of my mom's house was complete a week ago. I'm still getting used to someone else living in the house I grew up in. It was different with renters. They were borrowing it. Now the house is gone.

I had felt for a long time that the house was dead for my family. My parents divorced not long after my brother and I moved out, and my mom lived there alone for another twenty years. I liked seeing families with kids checking it out during the selling process. It's a house and yard with a lot of room for a new family. I hope it brings them joy.

My mom has been in a memory care facility since June, 2025, and the cost has gradually increased from $6800 a month to $7800, due to room changes and care needs. She declined more in the last month and an opening came up in a house with "increased care." It's now $9800 a month.

We were fortunate in the sale of the house. It happened just before her other savings ran out. Now we have enough for about three years before I'll need to figure out Medicare. The house is still taking care of her, I guess.

There won't be anything for the next generation, but I never really expected that. I worry about housing for our kids, but I understand why they wouldn't want to be tied to the logging town where we grew up.

Still, it's amazing how fast the medical machine can eat a family's legacy these days. The house is gone, and in just a few years the money will be gone, too.

#getablog, #sandwichgeneration