Spending some time this morning reflecting on this podcast episode that was recommended to me about people pleasing.
I'm trying to whittle it down to a couple of key take-aways that I can put somewhere to remind myself.
So far, I've got:
- People pleasing is like setting yourself on fire to keep everybody else warm.
- As long as I'm honest with myself and I'm not being rude about it, I'm not responsible for how other people react to a boundary.
- Commit to open and honest communication with myself and those around me.
- Saying yes out of obligation/people-pleasing is not really saying yes and is not showing up authentically
- Every time you force yourself to say yes, you are abandoning yourself.
Looking at this list, the absolute hardest one for me to internalize is that I'm not responsible for other people's reactions.
I get it, in theory. But I'm struggling to fully internalize it. If I say no, and someone is disappointed or upset because I said no... it's because I said no.
Maybe I'm not responsible for it, but I started it, and I made them feel that way.
This stuff is _hard_!
https://pca.st/b1dd24m2