Multiple head syndrome doesn't sound like a bad thing.
Inventor of excuses and other things. Do it tomorrow!
First, do no harm, and then do whatever else seems like the thing to do at the time.
Vacuum Forest 🌳
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Here's to pretty much anyone and anything I don't get along with someday vanishing up its own ass. I say this slightly because I'm still residually spiteful on account of the devil's mouthwash, and more the fact that I find such a phrase to be fucking hilarious.
I can scarcely imagine something vanishing up its own ass, but my best bet is that it's like a sea cucumber taking on a non-euclidean configuration, and then with an audible *pop*, it just disappears, ass and all, into thin fucking air.
I hate tequila in a spite-fuck sense that I'll drink it just to remind myself how much I hate it.
Probably as much as I love anything, I hate tequila. The more I drink it, the less I have left to love about life, and the easier it is to drink. Before long, everything is tequila, and you can smell it in the air around you, like satan's ass-crack.
Here's to the goddamn agave plant someday vanishing up its own ass and going on to bother another plane of existence where I'm not around, damn it.
Remember there is but one Earth, and we mustn't destroy our selves in order to be vindicated, we must only survive. That is the only real criteria. I just hope something is left when all the idiots are finished.
I once knew a Japanese man who married a woman from Holland. A few friends of mine got together after this happened and were talking about it in a bar. People in the vicinity became very confused as we discussed this fellow and his "Dutch wife".
Try to make a move on bae while you're watching a movie together on the couch, unfortunately it's a bridge too far.
Drove down to the Keys but now you're lost because you went a bridge too far.
Went to the dentist and now you're broke, it was a bridge too far.
Getting owned by the ghost of Omar Sharif while playing cards. That's just bridge, but am I taking this too far?
Some Chinese hotels keep Tibetan Mastiffs for security near the border. Mountain cities are metal as fuck.
Someone puts what is basically okay rafute on top of instant ramen and calls it "world's best ramen". No, it's not ramen at all! It's rafute on top of instant ramen... I'm seriously divided here. On one hand, it's a really good first attempt at rafute, but the noodles were rubbish. Ahhh, whatever. I'm still in awe that someone accidentally did rafute in an okay manner (slightly overcooked, and what's with the 5-spice?) I thought it's hard to find rafute outside of Okinawa, so I'm happy, but...
Maiyannah BishopConsider: we don't often WANT to be fair to people. We WANT to think they're the bad people, we WANT to think they meant the bad thing. The outrage is easier for us, and considerably more rationalized than compassion often is. If you are outraged and be oppressive to another, and it turns out they're good, you can always just apologize, and hey, we're only human right? But if you are compassionate to one of the Bad People, this is an unforgivable sin, whether it's done out of principle or not. We abhor those who fraternize with the Others, even if there is no good reason they are othered.
Just for completion...