I am always shocked to find out that I am indeed living in an echo chamber. Even though it is vast and varies in what is in it I am always shocked to find out what all is out there.
It's hard to not wonder how many other thoughts and ideas and values are out there but I imagine it's even harder to entertain them all.
Oh, that's handy
I'm quite fond of "Thou gleeking knotty-pated mumble-news"
https://www.writerswrite.co.za/shakespearean-insults/
Shakespearean Insult Kit
William Shakespeare was an English poet and playwright. In this post, we share a wonderfully funny Shakespearean Insult Kit.
It was meant as a jest but sometimes I think about the implication that saying no makes me a bitch. He himself is rather misogynistic but what does it say about me that I found that funny at the time and still kind of do?
A few years ago I worked with a man who had recently immigrated to the united states and was trying to perfect his English. He would commonly ask us if he used the right word or pronunciation. One time he asked me about the difference between "Can I?" and "May I?" I gave it some thought and said "If you were to say "Can I buy you a drink" I may reply with "Yes you can, but no you may not." He considered this for a second and said "Why do you have to be such a bitch about it?"
I told him that I supposed I understood but it still sucked. He asked for forgiveness and invited me to a secret tea party with his partner Stacy, his right hand man Dillon, and a hand full of sentient teddy bears.
Hours later I was approached by a balloon guard who opened my cell. A cloaked figured entered the room and I rose to my feet. The figure removed his hood to reveal that he was my friend Nate. I asked him what the hell was going on, why was I in jail. He said he said he didn't want to throw me in jail but he had to put on the appearance of a stern king for his kingdom at this time of unrest.
He sat in his pink overalls and blue shirt on a throne of balloons looking unamused. I called his name and I was snapped with a long skinny balloon that was made into a whip. I was told that I was to address him as "Your Majesty the King" "Your Highness" or "Your Grace".
I was certain that he would hear me out since he knew me but instead he sentenced me to the darkest, deepest dungeon. I was dragged away and tossed in a dark and cold cell with nothing to entertain me.
I was quickly apprehended by the balloon army. I was wrapped head to toe in a rope of latex free balloons and carried off by a racing team of balloon dogs toward what looked like a bouncy castle.
Once we arrived I was taken to the King of the Balloon Kingdom which juts happened to be my friend Nate. In the real world Nate is a master balloon artist and owns his own company that does giant balloon art installations. (I'll attach a picture of him later)
I stripped out of my armor and climbed to the surface against the commands of the commanding officers. The balloon people had a wall of heating coils and from behind them they fired water guns and launched water balloons. I laughed and simply walked over, drawing all the fire and allowing the candy people to advance.
I did not want to injury any balloon people so I had cast aside my sword and approached the wall with my hands up. I am not sure what I was trying to accomplish.
Traveling through the trenches towards the front line I saw umbrellas and wide brimmed hats stacked up along the walls. The injured candy people looked like they were in various stages of melting. One of the candy soldiers signaled that there was incoming heavy fire causing everyone to take shelter. I was not quick enough and was exposed to the fire. The incoming object was a simple water balloon that splashed me enough to make my armor gross, sticky, and unpleasant to wear.
r҉ustic cy͠be̸rpu̵nk🤠🤖