Violet@Ice:~$💜
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Lilith, Mother of Darkness@Lunalucardrose20 how do you touchstone? I'm angry and I feel justified to be angry. But I know if I burn all these bridges, I will be wishing I hadn't in two days
@violet I'm not sure how much help I can be, but I'll try what little I (maybe, hopefully) can.
As far as I know, avpd has been researched woefully little, so there seems be very few established therapies for it.
I don't have a lot in coping mechanisms, it took me many, way too many, years to get myself to the point of trying to rebuild any bridges I burned. Even that happened mostly as a side effect of me feeling better, so while avpd didn't go anywhere, I'm able to at least try and fight it.
I guess experience is the best I might be able to offer right now. I burned many bridges, disappeared for years from peoples lives. I also was justified in being angry, I'm not denying that. But I personally regretted it every single day, and still do. I have managed to sort of rebuild some connections, but to this day it's hard. So at least in my experience, try not to burn those bridges, you might very well make yourself feel worse by doing that.
With all of this being said, I obviously don't know your situation. There might very well be some connections that should not only be burned, but also nuked from orbit. I'm just saying, really try to evaluate if it's worth it.
I hurt some people who are dear to me, and I despise myself even more because of that.
Edit. This might not be helpful, and for that, I am sorry. For now, it's the best I can do.
@Lunalucardrose20 it makes me feel better for not being able to see a clear line of delineation, and that if nothing else is appreciated 💜
@violet I do use distracting myself with different hobbies when my mind gets bad, but that only goes so far when the mind is bad all the time.
@Lunalucardrose20 mind bad 24/7, depression ramped up cause I am going off my meds so the things I do have to do don't feel enjoyable. Today's episode kicked me out of writing just as I was sitting down to do it for the first time in a week I think? Maybe less, idk. Now I just think I'm done with it altogether and the people I was doing it with. And it's so damn infuriating to feel like 5 months ago I could have understood the line of what was reasonable and what wasn't, and now that my brains got all fucked up and bonked around, I don't know which way is up anymore.
Bleh, sorry for the wall of text. I may be suffering from feel overflow 
@violet No worries, I'm happy to read walls of text coming my way. 
Quitting meds is something I know all to well. Have a fair amount of experience with how fucked up ones brain can get during the process.
Hopefully you feel a bit clearer after the worst withdrawals pass. Maybe see things more clearly then, don't know. Always a possibility.
Hopefully enjoy things again. If possible, try to "allow" this time of difficulty to yourself. You are coming of your meds, you feel like crap. That's normal.
Sorry if I sound like a self-help book, not my intention. 