They told me Jesus would open doors, but I decided to try him on smaller padlocks first.

(some Christian organization sent out bulk Jesus ads that contained little metal crosses, so I decided to make a holy jiggler)

#AlicePics #Locksport #Jesus #Challenge

@alice
Holy Jiggler is my new band name. #IMNBN

First album: Jesus Is My Lock Pick.

@ColesStreetPothole @alice I did once hear a real sermon in a real church about how we all had holes in the walls of our hearts and the minister exhorted us to allow ‘Jesus to fill your hole.’ To my shame (or pride) I was the only person sniggering 🤭. There’s no metaphor like a mixed metaphor I say…

@Janet_52square @ColesStreetPothole @alice

Personally, I put my thrust in Jesus.

@wakame @Janet_52square @alice
Hello, and welcome to the We Are All Going To Hell thread! 😂
@ColesStreetPothole @wakame @alice Speak for yourself. This story *comes* to you from one who attended her mother’s church and was a good daughter who hid her fit of the giggles. Personally I think that puts me up there with the nicest of the damned if not on the naughty step in heaven…
@ColesStreetPothole @wakame @alice though perhaps I also lose points for sharing on mastodon… 🙄😇
@Janet_52square Also, do I sense a feeling of . . . PRIDE? @wakame @alice
@ColesStreetPothole @wakame @alice in the proper sense. I might have stayed in a church that was inclusive and embraced Pride.

@Janet_52square @alice I think the minister knew what he was doing.

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