StephenJan 9
mhoye

Daughter just came home to tell me the teachers at school tried to confiscate her vape but they couldn't because it's actually a kazoo.

"I made a kazoo noise at them and I could see them dying on the inside so I made a sad kazoo noise instead. I don't think it helped."

The grin on her face.

Jan 8 at 9:14pmWeb
Show threadBlake CoverettJan 8
@mhoye Child-rearing achievement unlocked!
Show threadJeremy KahnJan 8

@mhoye

what a phenomenal hellion you have

Show threadWendy NatherJan 8
@mhoye Your daughter is a treasure.
Show threadStacey Cornelius ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฆJan 8
@mhoye I so needed this today.
Show threadThe Orange ThemeJan 8
@mhoye You parented exactly 100% right. ๐Ÿ˜‚
Show threadcoldclimateJan 8
@mhoye please thank you daughter for making my day. Did they confiscate the kazoo?
Show threadvfigJan 8
@mhoye making a sad kazoo noise instead! just genius
Show threadLog ๐ŸชตJan 8
@mhoye This is the best story I have read this week.
Show threaddotmavriqJan 8
@mhoye
You know what they say:
Some heroes don't have Vapes
Show threadCollette's BrainJan 9
@dotmavriq you win Dad Joke of the Week
Show threadJudithJan 8
@mhoye Top parenting! ๐Ÿ’ฏ ๐Ÿ†
Show threadAngua Jan 8
@mhoye

Add a Swanee Whistle and you have a radio band.
Winter Wonderland always works well (2 of each).
Show threaddanaJan 8
@mhoye Thank you! Really needed that laugh just about now.
Show threadFull Metal ArchaeopteryxJan 8

@mhoye
Next week, the school district outlaws kazoos because they are gateway devices

The dreaded kazoo-vape pipeline

Show threadLuqa ๐Ÿฆ„๐Ÿ’œโœŒ๏ธโ™พ๏ธJan 9
@DelilahTech @mhoye the vapeline, if you will
Show threadNickJan 8
@mhoye Heroic.
Show threadRichard HollowayJan 8
@mhoye love it.
Show thread9th   SageJan 8
@mhoye Baaahahahaha....the sad kazoo noise is next level, that's so good.
Show threadRobot Diver ๐ŸŒŠ๐ŸŒฌ๏ธ๐Ÿƒ๐ŸŒฟ๐ŸŒธ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑJan 8

@mhoye

This is a life skill. Absurdity in the face of oppression is PhD in life stuff.

Show threadRobot Diver ๐ŸŒŠ๐ŸŒฌ๏ธ๐Ÿƒ๐ŸŒฟ๐ŸŒธ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑJan 8

@mhoye

The world would be that much better if crowds of people followed ICE around making sad kazoo sounds everywhere they went.

Show threadCollette's BrainJan 9
@RobotDiver @mhoye I say, disarm them first
Show threadMorgan โšง๏ธJan 12
@collette @RobotDiver @mhoye distract them with the kazoo so you can disarm them
Show thread8tpercentJan 8
@mhoye bravo ๐ŸŽถ๐ŸŽถ๐ŸŽถ
Show threadThe FrogJan 8

@mhoye

As a teacher, I would have laughed my head off!

Show threadRuss SharekJan 8

@mhoye

*applauds*

I recommend gifting a kazumpet (a kazoo with large amplifying horn attached) as a reward.

Show threadVirginicusJan 9
@RussSharek @mhoye I have a kazoombone, which is also awesome.
Show threadRuss SharekJan 9

@Virginicus @mhoye

Pictures please!

Show threadVirginicusJan 9
@RussSharek @mhoye Behold the mighty Kazoombone!
Show threadRuss SharekJan 9

@Virginicus @mhoye

It is a magical thing of beauty.

Show threadCrazyDogLadySezPEACEJan 8
@mhoye Legend! ๐Ÿฆ„
Show threadMark DownJan 8
@mhoye tell your daughter I'm impressed, and I'm a former teacher
Show threadJ   Jan 8
@mhoye ๐Ÿ˜‚
Show threadSarah SammisJan 8
@mhoye hilarious.
Show threadjoeldnJan 8
@mhoye https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MxhRoK0KP0w
Jimi Hendrix - Crosstown Traffic (Guitar Kazoo jam)

YouTube
Show threadforza4galiciaJan 8
@mhoye They tried to confiscate really a vape...or a kazoo?
Show threadMx. Eddie RJan 9
@forza4galicia @mhoye
It was really a kazoo, they assumed it was a vape.
Show threadforza4galiciaJan 10
@silvermoon82 @mhoye See or touch the object (in case of being blind) is totally necessary in order to know reality.
Show threadGeorge BJan 8

@mhoye

https://song.link/y/U14IBek-wNU

Bolero Completely Unraveled by Sandra Boynton & The Highly Irritating Orchestra Michael Ford conducting

Listen now on your favorite streaming service. Powered by Songlink/Odesli, an on-demand, customizable smart link service to help you share songs, albums, podcasts and more.

Songlink/Odesli
Show threadMajd al-Shihabi ๐Ÿด ู…ุฌุฏ ุงู„ุดู‡ุงุจูŠJan 9
@gbargoud this is both delightful and horrifying at the same time ๐Ÿ˜ณ
Show threadBen ToddJan 8

@mhoye

That's the best kanews today!

Show threadAndrew ElwellJan 8
@mhoye I can neither confirm nor deny that a school classroom (TV at the front) was once reduced to chaos with many students pointing their calculators at the TV when others had the matching model remote to mute / pause the vcr and the teacher trying to confiscate the 'remote' calculators.
Show threadAirelle ๐Ÿ•ธJan 9
@Elwell @mhoye To be fair, my calculator (HP-48gx) had an IR transmitter and could be (and was, at a time) programmed to be a TV remote.
Show threadAndrew ElwellJan 9
@epithumia @mhoye true, but ye humble casio fx-82 wasn't quite that fancy
Show threadgordoooo_zJan 9
@Elwell @mhoye Omg, this just unlocked a lost memory. I don't know what happened to it, because I forgot it even existed, but in grade 7 or 8 I had a universal remote wrist watch (pretty sure I got it from thinkgeek.com (rip)), the primary function of which became confusing and annoying teachers ๐Ÿ˜…
Show threadThe Human CapybaraJan 8
@mhoye I think you can tell her she made all Mastodon proud.๐Ÿ˜
Show threadmostly tameJan 8
@mhoye as a former child I love this, as a current teacher, you're getting that back at the end of class
Show threadPaul Wermer, CC BY-NC-SA 4.0Jan 8
@mhoye
Thank you . That helped enormously.
Show threadGondorJan 9
@mhoye
Show threadsu_liamJan 9
@mhoye I love that wonderful feeling when you realize you raised your kids right.
Show threadIsocatJan 9
@mhoye Chef's-kiss-minus. Grade could be improved to chef's-kiss-plus with a video or audio attachment of sad kazoo sounds.
Show threadRob IsaacJan 9
@mhoye 9th of January and we have post of the year already
Show threadepicdemiologistJan 9
@mhoye Oh my God how I needed that laugh!
Show threadEricka SimoneJan 9
@mhoye QUALITY PARENTING.
Show thread@FourQ โ™ฟJan 9
@mhoye Kazoos make everything better. Sad Kazoos are the sound of 1980's TV. If a picture says 1000 words then a Kazoo conveys 1000 emotions.
Hell, we used to have full blown conversations with Kazoos.
Show threadTim ChaseJan 9
@mhoye what a kid!
Show threadMichaล‚ "rysiek" Woลบniak ยท ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆJan 9
@mhoye 10/10 no notes
Show threadMark ReidJan 9
@mhoye @acb I related this story to my daughters who are at high school and it may have given them some ideas judging by their chuckles.
Show threadLongspeakJan 9
@mhoye My wife and I loved this. Kudos to your daughter.
Show threadSteve HerseyJan 9
@mhoye
Truly, there is hope for our youth.