Mastodawn

More name stuff.

A friend elsewhere reminded me many boomers and early GenX folk don't use their birth names - they go by nicknames that may be nothing to do with their actual birth certificate name.

I realised of my immediate family, mum, her brothers, dad, his brother & wife - and all their *kids* - none of them use their biological name. three quarters use entirely different names. the rest use similarish nicks.

It's just me. only me, who uses the name on my birth certificate.

Holy wow.

Irenes (many)Oct 20

@NanoRaptor you can pick another one! just feel it's our duty to point that out

@NanoRaptor Now that you mentioned it...

Cis people: "Hey, I prefer to be called [nickname]."
Transphobes: "Looking good there, [nickname]!"

Trans people: "Hey, I prefer to be called [preferred name]."
Transphobes: "You need to go to conversion therapy, [deadname]."

@rgbunny @NanoRaptor Just a bizarre mindset to think it's Polite and Normal to respond to, 'Hello, my name is Michael,' with, 'Wrong, it's George.'

@thepi @NanoRaptor The mindset of bigots is just bizarre. They wouldn't be bigots if they had even a semblance of sanity.

@rgbunny @thepi @NanoRaptor It’s just a poor attempt at cleverness by hateful idiots. Their arguments are as weak as a flat earther.

I’ll call anyone what they want, old, new, or nickname. Easy. Just don’t change too often, because as good as my intentions are, my memory is shite.

I mean it’s no different from our nicks here. Not trying to drag someone’s government name out. That would be crazy.

(Though I keep reading it as RGB Unny:))

@yon I do that sometimes too

I should've chosen a different handle.

@rgbunny Your handle is fine:) Better than mine :)

Admiral Memo Oct 20

@yon @rgbunny @thepi @NanoRaptor

@NanoRaptor as a 70s/80s kid we assumed that was always true

David Chisnall (*Now with 50% more sarcasm!*)Oct 20

Your birth certificate says 'NanoRaptor' on it?

Graham Nealon Oct 20

@NanoRaptor I know a lot of people with an Asian background who go by an Anglicised name because it’s easier for them in Australian society. It’s not on their birth certificate; they just pick one to use at some point.

Enigma Voice Oct 20

@nealon @NanoRaptor same here, many Central Asia people with turkic names go by slavic names, like Gulnora - Galya. It's kinda cringe tho when some people demand such name because "your real name is too difficult, you all have another, easy name".

Tzimisce Flesh Oct 20

biological nameYou ask people to call you "Homo sapiens"?

Nanoraptor Oct 20

@flesh yeah ever since a friend’s brother insisted he use her “biological name” I’ve reclaimed that berko level of assery.

Rylie Stargazer 🏳️‍⚧️Oct 20

@NanoRaptor I was wondering about that too... Glad to hear it was intentional. @flesh

Ryan Finnie Oct 20

@NanoRaptor A few months ago I bought an RV from a camping friend who is in my Burner circles. I had always known her by her "Burner" name, let's say Pinky (i.e. a name which would not be on anyone's birth certificate normally).

We were out having lunch during the sale process and I said "you know, at some point I'm going to learn your real name". And she says "Oh, you don't know? It's Mandy." But yeah, I never had a reason to know, because she's always been Pinky to me.

... Until we get to the actual DMV paperwork and I learn her "real" "real" name is actually Sarah, and Mandy is what's she's known to her regular, non-Burner friends.

So she's out there just hogging all the names, is what I'm saying.

CM Harrington Oct 20

@NanoRaptor admittedly ‘Nanoraptor’ is a pretty cool name.

June T. Michael Oct 20

@NanoRaptor I'm from a culture where legal names are almost never used unless you're addressing someone very formal (using first name and patronym).
Moving to Germany, where most people use their legal name in their daily offline life, including parents, spouses, friends with each other, being adamant they can't call me by the short form, as "that's a distinct name, not the same, we don't do this here". (Think of Tatiana / Tanya - not my real name, just the pattern.)
Name culture is diverse :D

@NanoRaptor I didn't find it what my grandmother's first name was until after she had died. Apparently she just didn't like it every much, and so went by her middle name instead her whole life.

@thepi @NanoRaptor At times it was pretty common to go by your middle name. My mom does. Seemed like it was just a thing.

@NanoRaptor I'm not a boomer or gen x by any means but nobody in my family calls me by my actual name. Miga has been my nickname since I was 4 years old 😅

@MigaIsNotACat @NanoRaptor Have you always not been a cat, though?

@NanoRaptor
I had a family member who went by Scooter for his entire life, well into his 70s.

I also had a coworker where he and all his brothers had the first name Michael, so they all went by their middle names.

Names are weird.

Sindarina, Edge Case Detective Oct 20

@NanoRaptor Isn't it interesting how few people are bothered by different names when it's cis folks not using their 'official' names? 🤔

Anonymous Freak Oct 20

@NanoRaptor GenXer here.

Other than online pseudonyms, I go by a "common shortening of my given name."

In high school, I was on yearbook my senior year.

One obnoxious prick insisted on deadnaming the one trans kid at school at every opportunity.

I discovered that he went by "not his given name." He went by a nonstandard shortened version of his middle. (Think "Johnny" when his middle name was "Jeremiah".)

His parents named him "Merlyn".

You bet your ass I made sure he was listed as that.

WooShell Oct 20

@NanoRaptor wait.. so you were born as Nano Raptor? Now that's some cool coincidence..

@NanoRaptor On the Burmese side of my family no-one uses their birth certificate name. My aunt Chip was legally Jennifer, but I never heard anyone call her that. My dad is usually called Shandy, and I'm not even allowed to tell you what his legal name is.

WooShell Oct 20

@NanoRaptor Seems to be more of a male thing.. My dad went by a nick he got as a toddler because he couldn't pronounce his own given name, *everywhere*. I think most people didn't even know it wasn't his real name. Same as did his father.
My uncle goes by a shorthand of his real name, as do/did all the women in my family.
I'm only using my real name with family, to everyone else (incl coworkers) I'm Woo or WooShell as I had that nick since the 90s..

Petherfile Oct 20

@NanoRaptor both my grandfathers went by names that were just different than their legal name. Like, Jack instead of Alfred for no reason anybody remembered anymore. Not sure if it was common in their generation (~1920 I guess) or my family is a statistical anomaly.

@NanoRaptor I remember one time I lived with 4 other people that got together thanks to one online community. I didn't know their birth certificate names for 2 years.

The Stage Rabbit (he/him)Oct 20

@NanoRaptor On the other hand, I'm Gen X (tail end) and I insist on people using my given name because I don't feel the nickname versions suit me. No one in my family has ever used a nickname for me either. That might be part of it. In university and while I was doing outdoor Shakespeare shows, I sometimes went by my family name or an abbreviation of it, but there are fewer than seven or eight people who still use that.

The Stage Rabbit (he/him)Oct 20

@NanoRaptor But yeah, just realized my Dad, a boomer, went by Bob his whole life. Only my grandmother called him Robert.
Maybe because there were fewer names to go around back then? My mother and her two sisters all had unusual names, and they never went by nicknames. So maybe that's why? When half the men you know are named John, you maybe want to be Jojo and have a bizarre adventure.

FlyingCowMan Oct 20

@NanoRaptor my dad never used his birth name, even as a kid.

These days he mostly uses it as a filter for telemarketers. Anyone calling him by his legal first name is trying to sell him something.

Hugo Mills Oct 20

@NanoRaptor Both my dad and a maternal great grandfather went by their official names... but in both cases, that wasn't the name that was originally anticipated by their parents.

Dad would have been Paul, but was born on March 17th, so ended up as Patrick.

GGF was christened Cecil, but we think the vicar had an attack of administrative deafness on being told that the baby's name was Thistle.

🌴 Seph 💭 👾Oct 20

@NanoRaptor My grandfather went by his middle name, and my husband's family always referred to him by his middle name, something I never understood

vulgalour - Free Range Queer Oct 20

@NanoRaptor It's so prevalent that my late gran (Silent Generation) was asked what her full name was fairly regularly because people assumed Betty must be short for something else. It wasn't. Used to annoy her to no end.

Naga (he/him)Oct 20

@NanoRaptor
My grandmother was known as "Tottie" (from "tot," not from her name) almost all her life.

She was in her mid-90s when she finally told people she'd never liked it.