No Samsung. Just no. Nobody asked for this.

#IFA2024

@kaiserkiwi
Das Touch-Display würde mich ja schon aggressiv machen.
@kaiserkiwi I remember that dream I had about the lawnmower with big speakers for playing metal music - so very long ago. Now this shit is not even funny.
@kaiserkiwi Just imagine people running through the city with their washer phone ...
@kaiserkiwi This implies your washing machine has a microphone built in.
@cheetah_spottycat @kaiserkiwi don't you already need that, to be able to use the smart voice assistant on your washing machine?
@mxk @kaiserkiwi My washing machine has four buttons and one knob, what level of brain rot do you have to require a freaking voice assistant to operate it ...

@cheetah_spottycat @kaiserkiwi how about you realize I am joking about the sad state of reality instead of insulting me?

The way the industry goes, manufacturers rather give you voice control and a touch screen than consider producing appliances with physical buttons ever again.

@mxk @kaiserkiwi

That wasn't directed at you personally. It was a general "you".

@cheetah_spottycat @kaiserkiwi Boss: Great, now doing laundry at home isn't even an excuse to not answer my calls.
@r0k @cheetah_spottycat @kaiserkiwi What do you think the reason for developing this was, eh?
@cheetah_spottycat @kaiserkiwi
A surprising amount of devices already has microphones inside, they are just not yet fully active for everything
@kaiserkiwi

What a Personal Laundry Assistant?
If it's that smart, it can also load & unload itself.
Ideally also do the shopping.
@kaiserkiwi Imagine receiving an important call during the 3 minutes that it takes to load the machine. How else could one answer!?
@kaiserkiwi Tech is out of ideas isn't it.
@kaiserkiwi
Ive worked with a few guys who won't get cell phones because they don't want to be able to be reached any time. If they're out, they're out.
This is the exact opposite of that
@kaiserkiwi "Are you incapable of finding your phone's speakerphone button but willing to dig through all the settings on your washing machine? Well do we have the product for you!"
@kaiserkiwi why reach all the way into your pocket for a portable device you can carry to other rooms, when you can answer it by awkwardly speaking to a large box at waist height that keeps making loud spinny motor noises and water pumping sounds?
@kaiserkiwi I don't even want to answer calls with my phone.
@alicemcalicepants @kaiserkiwi Unless it's my GP surgery I don’t. I let them all go to voicemail and if they leave a message I text or email them back.
@howrandom @kaiserkiwi I don't even have voicemail set up, if it's important that someone contacts me, then they can do so by email or text 😁

@alicemcalicepants @kaiserkiwi I salute you! That's next level. 😆

How did you mange to get away without setting up voicemail? Mine was on by default sadly.

@howrandom no idea, I've had this number since 2010 😄

Whenever I've used IAPT (or whatever it's called now), they've been like 'are you *sure* we can't leave a message?!' Like, they work with anxious people all the time, surely they of all organisations should understand.

@alicemcalicepants They probably started turning voicemail on automatically some time after 2010 then. I seem to remember having to manually set it up in the early 2000s but have had iPhones since 2007 and the early ones had Visual Voicemail on by default.

I think IAPT is now Talking Therapies; and yes, they should understand!

@kaiserkiwi

Is it real bullshit,
or AI generated bullshit ? 🤪

@kaiserkiwi you WILL let us listen to your phone calls through your washer
you WILL subscribe to this service and not be able to use your washer without it
you WILL give up personal ownership of all physical possessions and you WILL like it
And I thought internet-connected dishwashers make no sense.
@kaiserkiwi the only thing I want to do LESS than answer a phone call in any other context is answer a phone call during laundry time
@sofiav @kaiserkiwi That's until someone adds this "feature" to the toilet ...

@HollieK72 @sofiav @kaiserkiwi

I'm sure it's been added to toilets a long time ago... I've had a few conversations with God, in Swahili, in the big white telephone after a night out...

@kaiserkiwi I agree. I want a phone that makes and receives phone calls, and is optimised for that job, and a washer that washes, and is optimised for that job.
@kaiserkiwi "you'll never guess from where I'm calling you"
@kaiserkiwi I choose to believe this is fake.
@ryanc I want to believe it's at least a joke. But the whole hall from Samsung was pretty weird. AI here, AI there. Microphones in devices that shouldn't even need power to function. I so much don't want this.
@kaiserkiwi plllleeeeeaaaase put our malware on your network pllleeeeeeaaaaaase. If you do you can, i dont know, open google maps.
@kaiserkiwi wonder how the vibration alarm of the washing machine will sound like.
@kaiserkiwi @neingeist They are shouting the threat from the rooftops at least. So you know what to avoid 😅

@kaiserkiwi

To heavy to walk around with it…

@kaiserkiwi I just looked at their website. They have an AI vacuum cleaner.

Not, like, a Roomba or anything. Just an upright vacuum cleaner with "AI".

@kaiserkiwi i wish i could answer calls from my washing machine. i think the background noise from the motor on spin cycle would make such a romantic vibe....
@kaiserkiwi @ShadowJonathan this is satire, right? Please?
@h5e @ShadowJonathan I still hope so. But it was an advertisement right next to their new washing maschines. 🫠
@kaiserkiwi @ShadowJonathan But how would that even work? Like a bt speaker? That’s… I… YOUR PHONE AS A SPEAKER IN IT. You can do handsfree on your phone! Loading or unloading a washer takes what, 10 or 20 seconds? In what world would it be worth the effort to switch to an external speaker for that time you spend loading or unloading the washer? Or go “hang on a sec I need to load the washer” and put your phone down for moment? WHO NEEDS THIS

@h5e @kaiserkiwi @ShadowJonathan nope

> The AI Home LCD Display can also be used to manage other connected Samsung home appliances, making it a breeze to multi-task and knock out chores around the house. Users can check on the status of the food cooking in their connected Samsung oven while they fold clothes, order more detergent through their Amazon Essentials app and answer their doorbell4 and incoming phone calls – right from the screen on their Laundry Combo™.

https://news.samsung.com/us/samsung-expands-bespoke-ai-laundry-line-space-saving-formats-pair-smart-functionality-innovative-design/

@eloy @kaiserkiwi @ShadowJonathan ooooh what productivity! Checking the oven timer while loading the washer! Doing housework was never easier!
@eloy Thanks for the link. Noe I have something for the people that call me a liar that faked the image.
@kaiserkiwi @blogdiva At least it’s not an AI washing assistant feature.
@ramsey @blogdiva Well the new washing machines have AI, so maybe it is? 😅
@kaiserkiwi I mean, gen Z refuses to take calls even with their phones (some millennials do to).
@kaiserkiwi Modern people: What is this ”call” you talk about?
@kaiserkiwi but do they come with Samsung Knox? I want to store my credit card info on my washing machine
@kaiserkiwi none of the people involved in this "product idea" have ever done laundry themselves.
@kaiserkiwi I don't want to answer calls on my phone, let alone my washer.
@kaiserkiwi On the other hand, if I could wash clothes with my phone ...
@kaiserkiwi wow, exactly what I've always wanted.
- Nobody. Ever.
@kaiserkiwi Sorry I can't wash, you are not using Samsung washing pods, please sign in here to create your washing pod account.