Mark AsserJun 27, 2024
Ah, that new toaster smell...
SturmUndDrangerJun 28, 2024
Show threadMark Asser

New toaster review: Yep, this is toast. Toaster works. Not much else to say about it.

I think the strange individuals who left negative reviews of this cheap electrical appliance were putting too much faith in the transformative powers of twice-cooked bread. It's a toaster. It makes toast. What the fuck else were they hoping for?

Jun 27, 2024 at 10:34pmWeb
Show threadWokebloke for DemocracyJun 28, 2024
@MarkAsser
The camera could be better.
Show threadMark AsserJun 28, 2024
@dougiec3 And maybe the soundtrack.
Show threadstibJun 28, 2024
@MarkAsser
I don't know, we have a toaster that is almost certainly possessed by some ancient evil whose name I dare not utter. Like Tolstoy said in his Amazon review: all good toasters are alike, all bad toasters will make you miserable in different ways.
Show threadeconadsJun 28, 2024
@MarkAsser @TheBreadmonkey
Late for a review (like 10 years), but it would be lovely to be able to take the damn thing apart and see if something is obviously wrong with it before sending it to the tip. But no, the fuckers included that 1 "safety" screw which looks like - - to ensure built in obsolescence.
Show threadMark AsserJun 28, 2024
@econads @TheBreadmonkey My deceased toaster has a plastic case and a plastic base and there's no clear way to get at the actual mechanical bits without destroying the plastic bits. Utterly frustrating.
Show threadeconadsJun 28, 2024
@MarkAsser @TheBreadmonkey
Yep. Looking for a repairable replacement, there is some 300€ monster (I don't need 4 slices of toast and have limited kitchen space these days) and a university project to make a repairable toaster which is basically a metal box, which might be ok. I think you basically have to build it yourself though.
Show threadAmerigo BenaseraJun 28, 2024

@MarkAsser

There is apparently a smart toaster for nearly £500 that is all the rage on tickety tock

Show threadMark AsserJun 28, 2024
@TheBreadmonkey Five. Hundred. Quid. Bloody hell. The toaster could be smarter than its purchaser.
Show threadTony WellsJun 28, 2024

@TheBreadmonkey @MarkAsser

I wonder if that £500 toaster stops working when the company goes bust because it's linked to the cloud or something, like Unauthorized Bread by @pluralistic

https://arstechnica.com/gaming/2020/01/unauthorized-bread-a-near-future-tale-of-refugees-and-sinister-iot-appliances/

Unauthorized Bread: Real rebellions involve jailbreaking IoT toasters

Cory Doctorow's book, Radicalized, is up for a CBC award. To celebrate, here's an excerpt.

Ars Technica
Show thread"Mediocre Bunny" EvelynJun 28, 2024
@MarkAsser [Takes deep drag on medium-light slice of toast, exhales]
Look, kid, I’ve been around the block on this one, & then some. Bad crumb trays, hair-trigger darkness settings. That one toaster only my mother could love, that shot flames up to the ceiling if you didn’t take the toast out the minute it was done. (“But,” I hear Mom protest from the Great Beyond, “It made really good toast!”)
Ya got a toaster that does what you want. Just thank yer lucky stars, & finish yer breakfast already.
Show threadMennoJun 28, 2024
@MarkAsser
Look, this product works as intended, but I'm still giving it a negative review.
First of all, the user interface sucks.
It has two settings: on and off.
Sure, there's a knob with numbers on it, but what do they mean?
There's no help function, no video tutorial.
I mean, don't get me wrong, I've been toasting bread since I was 5, and if I'm honest, I make a pretty mean toast, but what if I were new to all this??
I tried to call their service number.
No help from them.
Two stars.