Elon Musk Twitter Meltdown Megathread Part 4

Part 1: https://mastodon.cloud/web/statuses/109520799673427113

Part 2: https://mastodon.cloud/web/statuses/109542103348007605

Part 3: https://mastodon.cloud/@cspam/109557995621239068

This time, Elon didn't pay his bills last month and now everything is falling apart on the first of the month, prompting *emergency action*

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guys the Titanic's beverage service is now cash bar due to piracy

*raucous, horrific booing almost but not quite drowned out by rushing water and groaning metal*

OK since the ship just snapped in half drinks are now 33% off. happy hour!

just in case anyone was wondering, twitter does indeed count viewing the same tweet multiple times as multiple views. every time you navigate to your feed, even if there's nothing new on it, -20 to your quota.

absolutely amazing

to make advertising worth it, you need to get as many eyeballs on ads as possible

so if the timeline doesn't work, and the ads are part of the timeline and the only part of the service users would remotely tolerate ads on (and also the hardest part of the service to filter ads from), how do you get ad dollars?

just, what an idiot baby who doesn't understand the emotional validation box he's utterly, neurotically addicted to and felt the need to buy in order to feed that addiction harder

this has to be a desperation move related to the migration off of google cloud rather than anything involving scraping

musk is not working as twitter ceo/head twit/whatever comedy title he has.

he is amphetamine and ketamine numbed, twitching and sweating, reacting with goldfish memory in real time and issuing grand decrees 13 times a day to the 112 H1Bs that put up with his shit because they don't want to back to mumbai.

there is no leadership happening. this is hitler in the bunker tweaked out and screaming shit.

https://www.bloomberg.com/opinion/articles/2023-06-27/silicon-valley-is-on-drugs

Silicon Valley Is On Drugs

Also private credit, the purpose of banking, bags of cash and biotech hedging.

Bloomberg

Katie Notopoulos, great tech journalist, did another Twitter Spaces for people to anguish at the changes. Mostly people throwing about theories and noting that there were no exceptions carved out for Amber alerts, weather alerts, etc.

The highlight was one defender who after delaying answering why it was a good decision could only cite "technical reasons" and "this will make Elon more money so he can make Twitter better, and then make X.com, we have to trust him".

https://twitter.com/i/spaces/1lPKqBmjyPYGb

This is a great idea I think there should be like subscription level options for how many tweets you can read a day. Like what if there was like ultra diamond gold Sergeant Master Sergeant III for $999.99/month that let you read more than 25 tweets

I mean honestly this isn't just good shit I'm really glad Twitter is going to fucking die as one of the most monetized things on the fucking planet because Elon musk is literally running this thing like somebody runs raid Shadow Legends

not only did he time this terribly, but he timed this terribly as everybody senior/staff or above is taking Monday off to turn this into a 4day weekend so fucking everybody that is tangentially engaged with twitter is getting pagerduty screeched when they're trying to enjoy some blue moons and shitty grillburgers right now. absolutely everybody jumping into the slack incident channel is angry as fuck and spinning the cylinder on their .38 in the desk drawer
Yaccarinooooooooooo, we lost the Turd!
The woman who slept in her office to appease Poppa Elon has some thoughts
He wanted to charge for API access an insane amount and everyone laughed at him. So he tried to "fix" it to show them whose boss. And now everything's on fire.

Reminder that he's still trying to turn Twitter into a clone of the one successful project he's ever been involved with because he's that unimaginative, but he almost killed that one too.

He wanted to name paypal to "X" even after every test audience thought it sounded like a name for a porn website and threw a big tantrum when they went with the name paypal lol... then he insisted they migrate all their servers from Linux to Windows NT4 until the board fired him for being an idiot

Is this the most openly fascist thing to normies he's said?

I feel like for me it was him saying "We Need a New Sulla" while referring to himself which sent me the final "nutcase fascist" vibe to me, but unless you are a Roman history nerd I feel like that's way too obscure for your average Twitter user.

This is the post you show any remaining Musk stans in your life.

Also people need to understand that the white South Africans that infest (and yeah I'll phrase it that way) the Anglophone tech scene very genuinely want to engineer a return to the homeland in conquering triumph. They want to restore white rule to the whole of southern Africa and have accepted that they need to do a shitload of violence to accomplish this. They are dyed-in-the-wool white supremacists and everything they do must be viewed through that lens.

they just want to be wherever they aren't invited so they can ruin shit for everyone else

they have like half a dozen right-wing crank twitters of their own where they can do unlimited slurs but if they aren't making other people miserable while they do it it's pointless

Great article by Charlie Warzel at The Atlantic

Matt Levine continues his run of being the writer who best keeps on top of Musk’s bullshittery:

https://www.bloomberg.com/opinion/articles/2023-07-03/insider-trading-is-better-from-home

Insider Trading Is Better From Home

WFH insider trading, Paxlovid shadow trading, SofBank bought the wrong AI and Elon Musk broke his website.

Bloomberg

Things are going great at twitter!

This is amazing to me; this is a carefully phrased statement released by whatever fragments of a PR department twitter has left, and it's just not able to disguise the loopiness with corporate-speak. These are the kind of people who can reframe eradicating indigenous peoples as "revitalizing deprived areas with new investment", and they can't make Elons flailings sound anything but insane.

If you, a corporate communications professional have to use the word "extreme"*, you are in trouble. That is a scare word, and your job is to soothe your users, your board, your investors and your advertisers.

"While this work will never be done" = "this chaos is not going to end any time soon" = RUN AWAAAAAAY

* barring the use of XXXXtreme Flavor, of course

This is just the "moments" feature they killed not long ago, moved to a different place on the UI and now you have to pay to use it.

Just put it all behind a pay wall Elmo and free everyone already.

big deal who even uses google to find tweets anyway twitter's search works perfectly fine and it totally doesn't matter that you have to log in to your account to use it

so it seems that some of the blue check simps are starting to realise that they can't pay to make their posts worth reading and are giving up on, leaving only the most pathetic ones still paying

https://www.theneweuropean.co.uk/the-slow-sad-death-of-twitter/

"if I get a blue check I'll have a million followers in no time" is very "if I buy a rolex I'll be just like a rich guy" energy

but rolex sells a million watches a year for 10 grand a pop, elon is getting $4.75 after app store fees. he should have made it at least a grand a mo.

The slow, sad death of Twitter

Elon Musk has hollowed out the social network just as a vital election cycle approaches

The New European

steal gasoline with one weird trick car owners hate!

lmao literally just advertising crime

gas siphoners, collapsible weapons, secret fire starters, car door unlocker wands, MyPillows, only the best advertisements on ElonTwitter

Is that a fact?

https://www.reuters.com/world/europe/twitter-not-suited-emergency-communications-dutch-say-after-storm-2023-07-05/

"Twitter is not the right place to seek information during an emergency, Dutch politicians and a prominent online group said on Wednesday, following an incident in which citizens were directed to the platform for updates during a large storm.

...

"You might see one tweet with great information from emergency services, but maybe there are 10 tweets that Twitter prioritizes which contain completely false information," he said."

Twitter not suited for emergency communications, Dutch say after storm

Twitter is not the right place to seek information during an emergency, Dutch politicians and a prominent online group said on Wednesday, following an incident in which citizens were directed to the platform for updates during a large storm.

Reuters

Tweetdeck just got got

all my columns gone

@cspam

Twitter: The home of Alternative Facts. 🙃

@cspam It is NOW. Didn't used to be.
@cspam this is the one based part of the new ad regime, crime is cool and good
@cspam Remove catalytic converter quickly with this one simple trick!
@cspam I saw this ad on fucking YouTube a couple days ago. And they wonder why we use ad blockers....
@cspam Excellent article, although the author seems unaware of the explosive growth in Fediverse signups in the last couple of weeks.
@cspam
Twitter actually charges $11 for the subscription if you buy it on an app store to account for fees (and people pay it for some reason)

@cspam

Unless you have no account and do not want an account but would kind of like to see what's going on with an earthquake in your area...

@cspam after they supposedly made some new deal recently just before the server bill was due, it’s clearly a sign of a strained relationship
@cspam BREAKING: Twitter links in general. They are breaking.
@cspam Chester Cheetah thrives on chaos.

@cspam
Suddenly it's about "preventing use in training models?"
Pick the latest vapid trends, say "we were on it before it was cool."

Also, isn't the rate limit actually because they didn't pay some bills?

@cspam and it’s only a small proportion of “users” as only a small proportion of their users engage at all. And it’s getting smaller every dayZ
@cspam
I think you have a typo, trouble arrives after the third "X."
@cspam Challenge: You are a PR person but Elon has final pass of your message.
@cspam the undeniable scent of 100% pure horseshit directly from the source.
@cspam @cstross the first two and second last paras read like ElonSpeak™ to me. Discuss…
@cspam @DGiant it’s now at the Parler visibility level as well.

@cspam

Remember, a few days ago they were only up to the level of emitting poop emoji. This is a big step up for them. Shouldn't we encourage them? /s

@cspam I'm surprised they didn't just issue a press release with the poop emoji.
@cspam but has anyone heard from the CEO since this all started? #WheresLinda, Elon?

@cspam

New #XCorp #Twitter #meme just dropped like 🐖+🐦=💥

@cspam

New policy change #meme for the #SortaOpenWeb #NoReplysWithoutLogin at #XCorp's #Twitter

Image Text Description: A Pig 🐖 in a Truck rolling up it's dark tinted window with an overlay of text on its head that reveals itself when the window that is tinted rolls up that that reads "#XCorp, You can view only #NonLoginUser #OneTweet 07-05-2023" with Homer staring at the pig 🐖 with #SortaOpenWeb #WebUsers on his head overlayed as text.

@cspam having spent a lifetime being a nerd and a dork, I can tell you that's just how bullies of all persuasions generally roll. When you remove yourself from their presence, they follow you while calling you names.
@cspam @lisamelton Dorsey is an investor on twitter. He is also an ally to musk.

@cspam

Just an aside...anyone who endorses RFKjr is not a liberal.

@cspam Afrikaners. The contempt for the not Nazis (I use my own frame of reference) is blatant.
@cspam 💯 they are easily spotted by syncophantic promotion of #RussianWarCrimes.
@cspam he wanted to migrate from Linux to Windows NT4? Why? Is he a degenerate? A pervert? Why?
@cspam ΠΔΦΛ ΠΟΥΛΑ ΚΑΙ ΠΟΥΛΟ
@cspam I'm away from social media for two days and come back to this! I missed all the fun.
@cspam big words from someone paying for a checkmark
@cspam Unfortunately, Elon prefers the traditional way of sleeping your way to the top.
@halfcocked @cspam A horse is a horse, of course, of course
@cspam I guess that explains why Lex invites ghouls onto his podcast
@cspam ok, gonna grab an XXXXXL basket of popcorns for the wait...