smells of bikes
I was at a gas station and the stupid gas pump ad machine was yammering "a dirty fuel system can reduce your car's performance" and I hate listening to ads so I snapped back "a dirty fuel system can reduce yer mom's performance" and the woman who was standing RIGHT BEHIND ME for no obvious reason as it's a huge empty gas station did a spit take so hard she shot pepsi out her nose and hit my back with it and then covered her face and started coughing and now neither of us can ever go there again.
Jun 27, 2023 at 1:57amWeb
Show threadÁngela Stella MatutinaJun 27, 2023

@smellsofbikes

I'm sure you made her day!

Show threadMaura HubbellJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes So much better than parking on a diaper. :’)
Show threadsmells of bikesJun 27, 2023
@SistaWendy oh no is this from personal experience?
Show threadMaura HubbellJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes Adr & Asp were at a gas station years ago. They reported parking on a diaper to MOO. It became a minor meme.
Show threadsmells of bikesJun 27, 2023
@SistaWendy alas that I missed this!
Show threadColes Street PotholeJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes  😂
Show threadNick 'The Viking'Jun 27, 2023

@smellsofbikes

I feel bad LOLing but it's a really awesome story 😅

Show threadChloe G artistJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes Wait…your fuel pumps have adverts? That’s awful.
Show threadsmells of bikesJun 27, 2023
@Chloeg full color video screens and stereo speakers. Yay USA.
Show threadAvocado ToastJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes of all of the things that definitely didn't happen, this is certainly one of those things
Show threadxs4me2Jun 27, 2023

@smellsofbikes

Hilarious!

Hey, that's a Spitfire with side pipes in your profile!!!

Show threadsmells of bikesJun 27, 2023
@xs4me2 HARLEY pipes! both sides, both functional.
Show threadJonathan MullJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes yer mom is the best
Show threadpixelbudJun 27, 2023

@smellsofbikes on a side note: top second unlabled button to the right of the screen = mute

On most of them.

Also, awesome story. 😂

Show threadsmells of bikesJun 27, 2023
@pixelbud I will try this. I'm too annoyed by the whole concept to do a good job thinking about it, usually.
Show threadpixelbudJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes I totally understand. I couldn't sleep so I thought I would share the accidental wisdom – I found it out by hitting all the buttons out of frustration – it's always SO LOUD lol 🙃
Show threadsmells of bikesJun 27, 2023
@pixelbud okay now "hit all the buttons" I can definitely manage. That's about my level of functionality.
I wish they'd make them so they'd shut off if someone is growling at them.
Show threadpixelbudJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes or give me a gas discount to leave it on – if it had volume control – share that ad revenue #wishfulthinking lol
Show threadWreckingball4goodJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes i stg this happened to me recently.
Show threadUserJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes lmao
Show threadMark FraserJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes and this is why adverts are a bad thing.
Show threadDr. PeteJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes If there's a Gofundme to buy you and her a gas station of your own where you can live in peace, I'm in for $20.
Show threadk cavaliereJun 27, 2023

@smellsofbikes Bravo! I stopped going to one gas station because of those annoying gas pumps. If I can't mute that noisy nonsense I leave.

How come public EV chargers don't have that annoyance?

Show threadsmells of bikesJun 27, 2023
@thinking_images yet another reason for me to go EV!
Show threadKat A Klysm Jun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes @tezoatlipoca if it’s a Gilbarco dispenser (brand name is below the grade selection), you can press the second button from the top and mute it. It makes the experience much better.
Show threadideaPDishJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes
Welcome to the world of driveby comedy.
Show threadMichael BaconJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes This is what is best in life.
Show threadDoug WinterJun 27, 2023
@smellsofbikes your gas pumps have talking adverts?!
Show threadsmells of bikesJun 27, 2023
@winjer I've been informed in this thread that it is possible to shut off the audio for what are essentially loudspeaker televisions blaring ads at their captive audiences.
Show threadRobin Frost Has MovedJun 28, 2023
@TSchulte @smellsofbikes Oh my goodness I'm legit cryin' over here from laughing so hard. I can't catch my breath. This struck me soooo funny because i have a friend who might say something so similar I could almost hear this post in his voice. Thank you gas station visitor for giving me the gift of the best laugh I've had in literal ages. I only wish we had audio or video of you actually saying it. 🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂
Show threadTammyJun 28, 2023
@robini71 @smellsofbikes It kind of broke me as well. lol
Show threadsmells of bikesJun 28, 2023
@robini71 @TSchulte alas I have a nondescript voice: if I could do a Tom Waits growl it would be memorable.
Show threadTammyJun 28, 2023
@smellsofbikes @robini71 It certainly would!
Show threadRobin Frost Has MovedJun 28, 2023
@smellsofbikes @TSchulte It'd be perfect no matter your voice I bet the tone was just right and fitting. And in that one moment inspired by frustration you brought this girl a great deal of joy in an other wise annoying time so I bless you for it truly. If I met you I'd shake your hand or give a hug in gratitude. 🤗🤗😁
Show threadHarmonicaPlayerJun 28, 2023
@smellsofbikes oh know rotfl
Show threadEnne is at [email protected]Jun 28, 2023
@smellsofbikes 😂😂😂🤣 That made my day. Thank you. 😂
Show threadThis is HellJun 28, 2023
@smellsofbikes 🤣🤣🤣
Show threadDushmanJun 28, 2023
@smellsofbikes
You people have audio ads at gas stations? America moment.
Show threadrinJun 28, 2023
@dushman @smellsofbikes it keeps getting more and more dystopic fr
Show threadsmells of bikesJun 28, 2023
@dushman weirdly, only at the nicer stations. The cheap ones buy the cheap pumps without the video screen.