Joe Fabisevich 
Oh haha, cool, spending my Friday night in an emergency room getting x-rays for a surfing accident that happened in Hawaii on Saturday (I hit rocks and there was lots of screaming) but has gotten so bad that the doctor I just went to saw the a 4x6 inch bruise on my lower back and said I need to go straight to the hospital for imaging.
Not to say this is the worst part but I was actually planning on releasing a beta tonight for a new app I’ve built in the last 48 hours, and am very excited to share. (I’ve actually built this so fast that the hold up is me waiting to pass through TestFlight review, not even app review.)
Also the surf school I went to is the absolute worst, an actual danger. Not only did they take us to a dangerously rocky beach (which I didn’t understand as a first time surfer), not only did they not teach me anything (we watched a three minute instructional video on an iPad, Colleen taught me some things before we went out), but when I was screaming in pain they didn’t provide me first aid, instead, and I swear this is true, they said “this is why you sign a waiver” and told me to “take five”.
Nurse: How did your accident happen?
Me: Surfing.
Nurse: What happened?
Me: I hit rocks.
Nurse: Did you throw yourself on rocks??
Nurse 2: Did you just ask if he threw himself on rocks?
Me, trying not to laugh: I fell off the board onto rocks.
Nurse 2: In all the years you’ve been working here have you ever seen a person who’s thrown themselves on a rock?
Nurse 3 as she’s walking me to the x-ray room: So, was Hawaii worth it?
Me: Well, you know, that’s a tough question to answer at the moment.
Entering hour six in the hospital, which of course means Colleen is here now and we’re watching Glee. #Gleewatch
Finally out of the hospital, can confirm that I’m not dying. Thankfully it’s just a hematoma, and even though they’re surprised at how big and painful it is after a week, all I should need is ice, ibuprofen, and a lot of bed rest. Even though it hurts so badly I wasn’t expecting the results to be too scary, and I’m very grateful nonetheless (especially after the doctor told me I needed to go get imaging done as soon as I possibly could). 🙏🏼
I don’t quite have the energy to respond to everyone who sent their well-wishes here and elsewhere, but thank you all so much. 🥺
Chris Wu 🪐@mergesort my mom is visiting right now and I read her your posts last night. She was asking about you today. Glad I could tell her a good update.
Daniel 🏳️🌈 Jilg 
@mergesort get better soon! What an awful experience with the surfing school!!
Tyler Hillsman@mergesort Phew, I'm glad it's a better than expected outcome and hopeful it heals quickly, pal!
Adam Wulf@mergesort glad it’s turned out well, hope you can get a lot of rest!
Brian Michel@mergesort fuck, happy to hear you are okay, need me to bring anything over to you?
Keir@mergesort phew! Glad everything is (relatively) ok Joe!
Evan Davis@mergesort whenever you encounter real urgency from a medical professional you know there’s some potential for things to take a bad turn. Glad it didn’t for you!
@mergesort !!! Yikes! Hope the scans turn out ok!
Romain Pouclet@mergesort feel better soon! ❤️
Florent Vilmart@mergesort hope you feel beater soon. Sending big waves of positivity your way!
@flovilmart No more waves please. 😭 (But thank you. ❤️)
gallaugher@mergesort dang! Be well, heal quickly, and Yelp that K-Mart surf school into the abyss. 🤙🏄♂️
@mergesort I hope that you don’t take this the wrong way, and I’m truly sorry this happened to you, but these posts are pure gold.
@MuseumShuffle I’m always trying to make the most of a bad situation. My mom often says “one thing I appreciate about you is that no matter how sick you are or how much pain you’re in you’re always funny.” 😅
Dave Klein@mergesort After I shattered my tibial plateau my surgery was performed by the Chief of Orthopaedic Trauma at Stanford Hospital. As he's leaving the room after my first checkup he turns back and says, “That was a really bad injury." Also “You were worse than we thought when we opened you up." GREAT.
@dk Though you gotta admit it’s probably better to hear that when you’re leaving than the other way around. 😅
Zeke Cao@mergesort damn dude. Either way, you rock.
@devilsx I think me rocking was the problem here.
@mergesort you'll bounce back. Stay solid.
@devilsx Planks a lot.
Alex Akers@mergesort "It was supposed to be a _very_ romanic moment, Nurse”
viq@mergesort
I mean, how would she know that she *has* seen such a person if she didn't ask? ;)
I mean, how would she know that she *has* seen such a person if she didn't ask? ;)
Rodrigo Escobar@mergesort hope everything is alright and you get better soon!
@mergesort what the fuck, that’s horrible. Hope you get fixed up soon though!
menotti@mergesort that's horrible. that school should be out of business, and liable. a waiver doesn't cover this kind of malfeasance, regardless of what they put in there. and it just sucks that your first time experience was so awful. hope you heal up soon.
@44 It’s not much but I left a very honest Yelp review, the first time I’ve ever left one chase it was legitimately a safety issue! Thankfully I mostly enjoyed myself so I’ll go surfing again, just not with them…
Gavin Nelson@mergesort holy. moly. Hope you’re back to 100% soon!
Mordechai Hammer 🔨@mergesort ?!?! Nightmare status dude. Sorry you had to experience that. Speedy recovery ❤️🩹