Zoomer Antimillenarian@Popehat
CHOOSE YOUR CLIENT
CHOOSE YOUR CLIENT
Ken White@surcomplicated I choose death
SpaceHobo9000@Popehat @surcomplicated how many of those have tried to pick a fight with you on ye olde bird site? At least two, right?
jadeabliss@surcomplicated @Popehat lol!! š
@Popehat You die, the devil appears before you, and laughs!
"CHOOSE YOUR CLIENT. In addition, you will be representing Rudy Giuliani in what I *think* is an unrelated case."
"CHOOSE YOUR CLIENT. In addition, you will be representing Rudy Giuliani in what I *think* is an unrelated case."
Dirk Hohndel@Popehat
Given the challenges many have with suicidal ideation, that's not as funny as it could be... But I understand the spirit of the answer.
I think "I'll become a full-time podcast host answering RICO questions" might also have worked š¤£
@surcomplicated
Given the challenges many have with suicidal ideation, that's not as funny as it could be... But I understand the spirit of the answer.
I think "I'll become a full-time podcast host answering RICO questions" might also have worked š¤£
@surcomplicated
Anthony (he/him)
Mark Harris
Arrestia@Popehat @surcomplicated that's what I was going to say.
ACAB for Cutie 
Pyperkub@surcomplicated @Popehat AFAIK, none of them pay their bills and are more likely to grift you.
Who will pay 100% in advance is the correct answer.
Khloe_the_Red@surcomplicated @Popehat SBF, hes a POS scammer, but hes at least capable of polite conversation
@Khloe_the_Red @Popehat I'd actually pick Avenatti. Probably marginally easier to handle client control with him than the others.
GruntyGinManThe...the Pepsi Harrier Jet Guy
June Casagrande@surcomplicated @Popehat They all pretended to support Democratic ideals at one time. The worst kind of phonies.
John Cutting
rodley@surcomplicated @Popehat
They all steal from customers/clients.
Avenatti is IN jail
SBF will be in jail
Trump and Musk are awful human beings and stiff vendors as a tactic
SBF is the guy. Deeper pockets, more to lose (parents) and doesn't stiff vendors.
Joe Jackson@surcomplicated @Popehat Nightmare blunt rotation
ćć«ć¹ć»ć¹ććć¼ć«@surcomplicated @Popehat
You should at least warn us when you post pictures of these a$$hats.
Maude, where'd you put my eye bleach?
Eric Miller@surcomplicated @Popehat the only winning move is not to play. (unless winning is defined by billable hours, in which case I have no idea)
Women4Popehat@surcomplicated @Popehat Only Elon has both the ability to pay and no history of stiffing lawyers. Thatās our choice.
@Women4Popehat @Popehat Client control will cost you quite a bit at the cardiologist, though.
@surcomplicated @Popehat thought about that, but it worse when theyāre talking themselves into a cell rather than an adverse civil result. Plus there is the greater ability to withdraw.
David Berg
Some rights reserved@surcomplicated @Popehat assuming you have to be paid up front in American currency, that really narrows things down... to zero?
Shannon
Tim Macinta@surcomplicated @Popehat Avenatti. He had the smallest reach and was just a run of the mill scammer.
Iadevaia16@surcomplicated @Popehat Definitely the effective altruism guy.
Pathom3333@surcomplicated @Popehat Damn, the lawyer is the least evil, Bwa-ha-ha-ha
AkauwelaApparently I live under a rock,,, Who's the fluffy haired guy w the crazy grin and dead eyes..
@surcomplicated @Popehat
@surcomplicated @Popehat
@Akauwela @Popehat Oh, he's not real he's actually an AI-generated abomination I cooked up to raise Ken's blood pressure.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sam_Bankman-Fried
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sam_Bankman-Fried
imbou@surcomplicated @Popehat I choose disbarment
Matthew Nadler@surcomplicated @Popehat SBFās broke, Trump never pays, Avenatti is definitely the kind of lawyer whoās a terrible client, so Musk? I assume his check wonāt bounce.
@matthewmuses @Popehat Musk and Avenatti are def the least bad options here--Trump and SBF are absolutely top tier at not only driving lawyers up the wall but driving everyone around them insane.
Lizard@matthewmuses @surcomplicated @Popehat He's currently not paying rent, software license fees, or travel expenses, so, I wouldn't be too sure of that. (Not to mention severances owed to thousands of workers)
alett@surcomplicated @Popehat Iāll pass
Murphyb849
klausfiend has moved@surcomplicated @Popehat is "dying slowly in a dark quiet place" an option here, or does it _have to be_ one of these four trainwrecks?
@klausfiend @Popehat Dying is not an option. If you die, you reappear in Hell, but end up *also* having to represent Rudy G, whoever else you pick.
@surcomplicated @Popehat oh god, it's Kobayashi-Maru, but with more paperwork
jprestonian@surcomplicated @Popehat "Ball-beaten with 2x6s."
Voradams 
@surcomplicated @Popehat client number 3 looks like Aussie Opposition Leader Peter "Mr Potato head" Dutton
Skeptiguy@surcomplicated @Popehat easy: Avenattis. He always fires his lawyers an represents himself.
Ken: I would pick the Court Officer in the bottom left pic.
@surcomplicated @Popehat how can you leave out Alex Jones?
@surcomplicated @Popehat Elon at least pays his legal bills, right?
AkivaMCohen@surcomplicated @Popehat Alex Jones is unhappy about being left out.
@surcomplicated @Popehat top left and bottom right have enough money to pay their bills
KarrieSully@surcomplicated @Popehat Elon is a low empathy āecosystemsā thinker, SBF is a āResultsā thinker with ZERO empathy (like Dahmer level), Avanatti is an Opportunistic Expert with some empathy which puts him somewhere between dictator and asshole, Trump isnāt the brightest bulb - he just uses empathy combined with opportunism to manipulate.
They all suck but the only one with a shot of being a better person is (ironically) likely to be the lawyer.
They all suck but the only one with a shot of being a better person is (ironically) likely to be the lawyer.
OutOfExile_IDR Ā§ Voice Ā®ā¢ļøI've decided to retire.
Take my client, please.