If I had maybe five dollars every time someone suggested "build your own instance" as a solution to any problem encountered on the fediverse, I might not need student loan forgiveness.
That aside, before you're tempted to respond to a critique of the fediverse with "build your own instance," consider that the suggestion is a polite way of saying "go the fuck away?"
I have written some what at length about why "build your own instance" is not an ideal solution for many communities; however, I would like to put all of that aside to make clear a point I thought was too simple to be mentioned.
The entire point of the critique is because we wish to exist in the same space as others as our full selves, and not some sanitized version limited by norms of conduct.
To be clear, whether mastodonians intend to reinforce this perspective is immaterial: the suggestion has the practical and affective force of telling those of us who level critiques that the fediverse will not shift its norms to enable a plurality of ways of being.
As a result, we might as well pack it in because our full selves are not welcome in community with others.
Now, I know that many folks On Here will ask for a solution to this issue and I actually have one. Like many solutions in my area of expertise, it is not a technical solution but it may be just as hard.
Ask yourself why "build your own instance" is your first response to someone who points out that they find it to be their full selves in a given space. Ask yourself why your suggestion is for them to leave? As yourself what that accomplishes.
Then get back to me.
@shengokai Yes, this. There is nothing wrong with building an instance that focuses on a specific theme, but that's vastly different than being told "you don't belong here" or "you must gather there."
The former is building a community of interest. The latter is segregation.
There's enough segregation in physical spaces. And fixing them seems a lot harder than being welcoming and fully inclusive in virtual ones.
Seeing that resistance on a platform that by design brings people together is disheartening and says uncomfortable things about the nature of power dynamics and of human failings.
Welcome to the real world, where no one is required to listen to you, no one is required to take you seriously, and no one is required to have you as a guest on their server.
Of course you can "build your own instance." That will not affect the first two points.
I didn't build my own instance to escape the realities of coexisting in a society. I built it because mastodon.social was getting hammered into jelly by too many users.
Everyone is free to mute or block me.
@chemoelectric @steve *complains about being told that telling BIPOC people to silo themselves isn't OK*
*invites to block*
The course _is_ clear.
@shengokai @steve Are you seriously grabbing the soapbox from *this* message, just so you can belligerently declare that Black people’s only problem in life and society is failing to accept “the realities of coexisting in a society”, unlike yourself?
*faces the crowd and points at the man on the stolen soap box*
This here is the what “nice” racism looks like. Learn from his mistake. Don’t let it be you.
I didn't belligerently anything. Nor did I say anything about "Black people’s only problem in life and society." Or anything about race, for that matter.
Go back and read what I actually wrote.
Wow, this guy is canvassing for Warnock. Tragic, to support Black people with one hand and act like this with the other.
This is a good object lesson in the complexity of our ingrained racism, our submarine racism.
We can be anti-racist with our heads, while still letting our feelings lead us into lecturing a Black man on how to properly deal with racism online. And then think we’re the heroic figure.
I’m taking notes. We’re none of us immune.
@steve @creatrixtiara A specific point of disagreement here:
Your post betrays a belief that you're entitled to be an ass and lecture the doctor.
No sir you are not.
You don't even have the qualifications to speak up on his points, let alone speak down to him as you did.
@shengokai
From the perspective of a Vietnamese American, born in the US... "Build your own instance" sounds a lot like "Go back to where you came from!" This thinking isn't just confined to virtual spaces like the Fediverse, but is pervasive throughout our society. What we need to fix our way of thinking. That isn't easy, but is worth doing anyway.
Thank you for your insight.
@shengokai @thekat03 Spot on.
And it’s not even advice that works. Building a new instance is quickly followed by the whole instance being targeted by the same racist harassment.
It’s shallow “oh have you thought of this obvious thing?” whitesplaining how to solve racism.
It’s “go live in your own towns” followed by “burn their town!” It’s advice to build a digital Greenwood.
@shengokai I think you meant to say "who finds it difficult/challenging/frustrating to be their whole selves" .
I also think the person is hearing it the wrong way.
I am no coder. But I believe, just looking at the documentation in Youtube, that I am capable of building my own server. That is very empowering to me. That I could, if I were willing to dedicate the resources, build a space where I might openly invite only Black Women and openly discourage others from entering, is a
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